Always There
by Lil-Yasha
Summary: A terrible thing happened during a battle with Naraku, even Sess is devastated. Little did they know...he was always there. Have tissues handy, even makes the author cry. IT ENDS HAPPY! OOC WARNING!
1. My Pack

**_A.N:_** **Let me warn you now that it is angsty and full of sorrow at first, but I promise you I will never make it end that way. Now, on to my first story fic.**

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Always There**

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The air was thick with the smell of blood and exhaustion, an injured figure stood before a terrible octopus thing, his sword singing in the delight on finally destroying it's foe. Inuyasha took in breath by shuttering breath, his chest stinging by the awful gashes inflicted upon him by the demon he planned to kill...ever so slowly...

Naraku.

It had proven to be an extremely difficult battle so far,but hopefully the last. The tired but still determined hanyou took a quick glance to the side, where Kagome was helping an equally injured Sango to stand. Miroku stood behind, holding his staff tensely in his uncursed hand, ready for back-up if needed. Shippo and a transformed Kirara were huddled around them as well, staring at Inuyasha with prideful eyes, though concern was evident in all of his companions' faces.

He gave a reassuring smile toward his pack.

Yes, his pack.

He cared for them so deeply. Of course he was considered too young to be the leader of his own pack, but somehow it had just happened. Miroku, Sango, Kirara, Shippo, even Myouga and Kaede, and let's not forget Kagome. The one he knew had helped him to discover his pack. Without her, without any of them, well...

...his life wouldn't be worth shit.

They smiled weakly back, and he turned his attention back to the matter at hand. Destroying the bastard that had cursed all their lives. Inuyasha knew, however, that without Naraku none of them would have met.

That didn't mean he had to show any mercy.

"Prepare to die, you bastard." Inuyasha growled as Naraku began to laugh, a booming, evilchortle that sent a chill down each of their spines.

"Inuyasha, what has happened to you? When did you begin to care so much for these pathetic humans? For these weak, little demons? I thought you didn't need anyone. " The bastard's slimy face suddenly lit up with a disturbing smile. "Ahhh, what a wonderful weakness..."

Inuyasha, as normal for him, began to lose his already fraying temper. "You're the one who's pathetic, Naraku. I will destroy you this day and send you to hell where you belong!" Inuyasha knuckles began to turn white due to his death grip on Tetsusaiga.

Naraku laughed again. "Stupid hanyou, you are the one who is going to die...but why don't I cause you as pain as I can muster before you go? When I am through, you won't have the will to go on. You'll _beg_ me to end your suffering."

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YO--" The hanyou's yell was cut off when he began to hear a sizzle in his ears. Inuyasha's hair on the back of his neck tingled and stood on end by the feel of the electricity in the air. He looked at his huddled companions in confusion, but they held no answers. Moving his gaze back to Naraku, he saw in surprise at the vast amounts of energy and miasma floating in a ball around the demon's tentacles.

"The pain begins, Inuyasha." Naraku than pointed the ball of destruction towards...

Inuyasha's pack.

They stared open-mouthed in horror at the crackling doom about to be released. Shippo jumped on Kagome's shoulder and shivered in fear. Miroku, keeping a brave face, grabbed onto Sango's hand. They all sized up as much courage they could find, and readied themselves for the painful death they all knew they were about to all go through.

Then Naraku, with a final chuckle, released it.

"NO!"_ My pack, they'll all die. I can't have that happen. They mean too much to me. I..._

Inuyasha began to run, adrenaline and the love for his friends..no.._his family_, sending him at a speed he had never once undergone.

_have to..._

He jumped and was surrounded by a bright light. "No... INUYASHA!" Kagome's plea sounded so far away when a powerful wave of warmth blew harshly on his body.

_save them._

The pain came after.

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A.N: ****There you go a bit of a cliffie, now I want to know before I begin to write the next chappie. What do you think, how's my writing? I would like some reviews and a bit of praise and/or critisism, before I keep going. i know you might hate me, actually I hate myself. But writing this, was a bit emotionally draining, cause I know what happens next. Reading the next chappie, you'll know whatI mean. It sounds stupid but I actually have a lump in my throat. I guess i get too into the story. Anywhoo (man I'm in a depressed mood, now) please review, and wait for the next chappie, it'll be longer. I promise.**_


	2. The Death of a Leader

_**A.N:**_ **Thank you everyone for being patient! I'm finally off grounding and had the time to update! WHOOHOO! Anyway, I hated the way my story ended up, Sess was sooo OOC (actually Chapter three wasn't supposed to be up there…don't ask), so I decided to redo Chapter two and three. But it still doesn't go the way I want it too, oh well, here ya go.**

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Always There**

**Chapter 2**

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The first thing that registered in the group's dazed minds, once the bright agonizing light had diminished, was the laughter.

An insane, hysterical cackle that roared in their ears and sent cold shivers of revulsion and terror down each of their spines.

It was certain to haunt their nightmares for many a night to come.

A foreboding feeling gripped at all their chests, they were terrified to open their eyes. What had happened? They were all still alive but…

With great willpower and heavy hearts, they rubbed away the spots dancing in their vision and strained to focus and comprehend the horrific sight before them.

"Oh, please God….no."

A terrible sight that was destined to haunt them for _much_ longer.

A few feet in front of them, burnt and broken, was the mangled body of Inuyasha; lying on his back in a pool of his own blood.

Naraku was howling now, but no one took any notice. All they could hear was the frantic '_thump thump_' of their hearts, pounding in their ears. It couldn't be…but he's not moving…Inuyasha was…

"Still clinging to life I see, Inuyasha, you still don't cease to amuse me. But it's all for naught. I knew that these pathetic creatures you call _friends_ would be your demise. Your greatest weakness, the lives of the people you care for." Naraku gave a malicious grin.

The five stunned friends, hope beginning to bloom in their eyes, stared intently at the dog hanyou. It was true! He _was_ breathing, shallow and barely noticeable, but he was! He was alive!

"Oh, thank God." Kagome gave a shaky smile, but their relief didn't last long as they were brought back to attention of what Naraku was saying.

"I can sense the darkness surrounding you, half-breed. Tell me, are you having difficulty breathing? Does your mind seem to be slipping away? Death is slowly claiming you, Inuyasha, and it won't be long before your soul is dragged to hell. You certainly have saved your precious friends for now, but once you're gone, how long will they last? Hmmm…a month…a week? I suppose I should let them wallow in their grief for you, that is…if they even feel—"

"ENOUGH!" Everyone turned, wide-eyed, to the young miko, tears streaming down her face. Her chocolate brown eyes were swirling with fear, sorrow, and most of all anger. Of her hatred of the wretched demon who had cursed all their lives, who had caused so much pain. Especially to the boy she had fallen in love with, who was slowly regaining painful consciousness.

It was all too much. To have Inuyasha selflessly jump in front of the blow that would have killed them effortlessly, and now Naraku was _making fun of him_. That was it, he was going to pay.

Kagome's hard core fury made her clenched hands tremble, her fingernails digging in to the soft flesh of her palm. Her mouth strained from the enormous pressure she was grinding it to, and the air seemed to spark around her.

In other words…Kagome was downright pissed.

She wondered vaguely if this was how Inuyasha felt when turning demon. Unless it was her imagination…but was she starting to see red?

"How _DARE_ you mock, Inuyasha. He saved all our lives! I will make you pay for hurting him, you vile thing! You…you…BASTARD!"

Oh, boy.

Everyone's eyes, even Naraku's (f you could see under his mask), widened in shock. Apparently the young woman was spending a_ little_ too much time with a certain dog-demon. Of course…under the circumstances…it was understandable. Once shaken out of their stupor, the rest of the gang nodded determinedly and stood tall by her side.

Inuyasha, stubborn and dense, had proven how deep his feelings went for them. Leaping nobly into the range of fire, he showed how a true leader and friend would act. Nobody was going to make fun of him for that. Naraku was going to pay for hurting him.

Readying themselves for battle, an engulfing emotion swept their bodies. Making their hearts feel light and strong. Pride for their leader, love for their friend. They were going to be certain that Naraku did not leave this battle with the last laugh.

With a powerful cry, they lunged for their revenge. Naraku's thin, wiry lips twisted into a disturbing sneer. Arrows ripped in a flash of pure light through his twisting tentacles, ofudas sparked on his grimy demonic skin, demon bone and claws slashed, and the air erupted in a bright blue light. But no matter how hard they tried, the Inu gang couldn't seem to be able to wipe that frustrating smirk off his face.

While another one of Kagome's purifying arrows made its way towards Naraku's chest, he cast one last red eye onto Inuyasha. His smirk soon transformed into a broad grin, before opening wide letting loose another booming crack of wicked laughter. The deafening noise echoed across the valley long after he had disintegrated.

Panting, they all gazed shocked at the place where the evil demon had once stood.

A lone wooden figure stared back with sightless eyes; one slimy black hair wrapped around it blowing mockingly in the wind.

It was a puppet.

Sango gave a scream of frustration and slammed her Hairokotsu to the ground, Miroku's grip twisted fiercely on the cold metal of his staff, Shippo ripped up one of his little leafs and growled, which intermingled with the angry roar of a transforming Kirara. Kagome grounded her teeth but didn't soak long in her frustration as a weak….

"Ka..gome…" reached her ears. Everyone was snapped back to reality by the small whimper and quickly made their way to Inuyasha's side. They slicked through thick blood matting on the grass, and tried to swallow the gritty bile that reared in their throats at the grotesque site they were nearing to.

Inuyasha didn't look too good.

That was a foolish understatement.

Inuyasha looked like hell.

Blood soaked every single part of his battered body, flowing over burnt black skin and once red kimono. His cute little ears were also singed and tweaked weakly at the sounds of their hurried footsteps. One of his legs were twisted sickenly at the wrong angle, while his other had a deep long gash that revealed the pure white bone inside. They also saw with utter horror, that Inuyasha didn't have two arms anymore; his right arm blown completely off at the elbow, now just a shredded stump. His chest, beneath his strong fire rat fur that was shredded beyond repair, was really no better off than his destroyed haori.

The gang fought against their nausea and made their way towards him, relieved slightly by the small beautiful smile that graced his burnt lips, besides the inevitable and unimaginable pain he was going through.

Kagome knelt down beside his decapitated arm and without even acknowledging the blood or mangled joint, placed his head on her lap. He winced slightly but didn't voice any complaints. The rest of the group sat around him as well, all knowing, deep within their hearts, what was going to happen.

Kagome stroked his cheek, her eyes sparkling with unshed tears. "You baka…wh-why…did you do that?" A few escaped her lashes but were swept away by Inuyasha's rough bloody fingertips. His face softened but you couldn't miss how his gaze clearly said…_'you're the baka'_.

"It's my job…remember? I wouldn't let that—"His gentle whisper was cut off as blood flowed into his mouth. His amber eye, the other completely burnt shut, flared with fear as he choked and sputtered.

_Oh, hell, not yet. Please, I don't care what happens to me, just please let me talk to them. Let me finish what I have to say._ As if someone had really heard his plea, Inuyasha was able to swallow back the metallic taste and take a few quick piercing breaths. _Thank you, oh God, thank you._ He opened up his one eye once again to the relief of his friends and smiled once more. "Even though I hate to admit it, that bastard Naraku is right, I am dying you guys. But I'm going to leave with all of you around me, all my wonderful friends. You have made me so proud and…happy."

"What are you talking about? You're not dying…we…we can heal you! We'll take you to Kaede and…and fix you up…just _wait _and see. You'll be just fine…I… I WON'T LET YOU DIE!" Kagome squeezed her eyes painfully against the stinging tears. A warm palm rested on her cheek and she gazed down at Inuyasha once more.

"I'm sorr…sorry for making you cry…I've always hated to see you cry. It's always my damn fault…isn't it?" Kagome shook her head franticly and his hand fell back down limply to the reddish stained ground. He gave another soft smile. "Even when I try to do something…nice…you do. But that's okay…hopefully this will make you happy."

He took a deep steadying breath and stared into her eyes, "Kagome…for so damn long…even though for the longest time…I couldn't admit it… but I…I love you."

The young priestess's voice hitched in her throat and more of those damning tears trailed down. Sango and Miroku smiled, as Shippo pounded his fist in the air. _It was about time._

"I'm…really…kicking myself…for not telling you sooner…but…oh, hell! I still made you cry!" Inuyasha's smile fell, and he looked up at her with unconcealed concern.

"No, it's just that I'm…s-so happy. I…I love you, too, Inuyasha, for as long as I could remember." The smile made its reappearance once more, and his relief and joy shone in his amber depths. Kagome hiccupped, "Oh, God! Please, don't go! I need you here with me! I…I can't live without you! Please…don't…don't go…"

"You're…going to have to…gome. I know…I really…don't want to leave you, either. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. But I ca…oh, dammit! Don't cry…I hate to see you cry. Please…just try to smile…for me. I've always…l-loved your smile." After several sniffs, the distraught girl, managed to lift a corner of her mouth upward. "There you go…that's..so…so beautiful. Now, you all have to…do me a favor…okay?" His wounded features radiated of stubborn command as he brought his attention back on the rest of his pack.

"Okay." Miroku nodded, a brave face plastered firmly on, but his bluish eyes were storming with grief.

Inuyasha nodded stiffly back and beckoned them all closer. His voice beginning to strain as numbness began to descend along his body. "You guys…do me a favor…and kick Naraku's ass…okay? He doesn't deserve any mercy…finish…what we started…and win…alright?"

"We'll make him die, a slow and painful death. We won't let you die in vain, Inuyasha." Sango said rigidly, her back straight and tall, though her own tears of sorrow made themselves known.

"Good…perfect…….get rid of that wind tunnel….avenge your people….and avenge…Kikyou as well." His eye clouded with thought and he looked back up at Kagome, "Kagome….can….can you…"

The young woman nodded in understanding, "Yes, I…I'll tell Kikyou, you loved her. And that you—"

"No."

"What?"

"I love you….remember? But do tell her…that I'm sorry….for everything I guess….whatever. She needs to move on…I don't care if she still hates me…just….Kagome you're so good at helping people…much better than me…could you help her find peace?"

Kagome managed to give a small '_yeah'_ between her newly sprung tears.

"Good…you guys…are so important to me…you know? I'm so glad that you'll all live….make sure you don't die any time soon….okay? Live a long, happy life."

"We can't be happ—"

"We'll do our best to stay strong and do as you wish, Inuyasha," Miroku said, cutting off Kagome's words, "our friend."

"You all…made my life worth living. The only true friends I ever had…my best friends…" Inuyasha's eye began to well up with tears as well, he made no move to cover them up or wipe them away, "My…family…my wonderful pack…I know you all make me proud. But I will find someway…to always be with you. Somehow…I will…no matter what. I still want to keep my promise…of always protecting you….all."

"Inuyasha….please….you big jerk…you can't go now." Shippo sniffled and made his way over to nuzzle the hanyou's large, clawed hand. "I…don't want to lose…another…oh, papa, please don't go!"

"Shippo," Inuyasha gave him an affectionate caress atop his fluffy, orange head. "I…don't want to…but I have to. It's my time to go, I guess. Take care of everyone, okay? You're going to be the top demon now…you have to be strong...for me.You take care and be happy….son. Don't ever stop smiling…"

"Okay, papa," Shippo summoned up as much courage he could muster, and hoped it looked real, for he didn't feel that way inside. "I'll protect everyone just like you…I'll be strong."

Inuyasha gave another brilliant smile, overflowing with fatherly pride, "Good boy…my pup." He moved his gaze slowly, now, onto Miroku and Sango, "Speaking of pups….you guys are perfect for one another, you know? Just stop being such a lech, Miroku…and Sango, admit it….you both love each other. Make sure…when all this is over…with the jewel…to have a big family…that is if Sango…or Miroku, too…can handle that." He chuckled quietly at their blushing faces, "Oi, I'm not _that_ dense."

Sango and Miroku gave him a soft, trembling smile, holding each other's hands. "Okay," Sango whispered, laying her head onto the monk's shoulder.

He seemed a bit surprised at first, but then his features turned into a loving look, turning back to the dying half-breed. "Yeah, we'll even give one the honor of your name." Sango nodded in agreement.

"Heh…that'd be nice."

"In…uyasha." He turned his head back up at Kagome.

"Kagome…you can have pups, too, kay? As long as it's not with that mangy wolf…or that Hoho guy," Inuyasha gave another weak chuckle. "Find a wonderful guy…who treats you kind…and loves you at least a little of how much I do…and live a long happy life."

Kagome shook her head violently, exasperated, tears splashing all over the dog-boy's body, "No, no, no! I could NEVER be with another guy! I could never love another! I CAN NEVER BE HAPPY WITHOUT YOU! NEVER EVER EVER--"

"Kagome," She paused, panting lightly. "I understand…I could never love and be with someone else after you...if you died….just, please…_try _to be happy." The young priestess, her heart breaking, nodded sadly; trailing her fingers softly down his cheek. "I don't want you all to stay grieving…and sad. Don't wallow too much in your pain, move on, and enjoy life as much as you can together….don't waste it." _Like I did._ "Do you promise?"

Greeted by tiny nods and sad eyes, he growled, and winced against the slight pain "Dammit…what did I just say?" He kept glaring, ignoring the throbbing in his Adam's apple, and waited as they all tried their best to smile. Inuyasha sighed. "Just try…okay? Now…I want you to burn my body…before you do whatever the hell you'll do with it."

"Wha—"

"I don't want…Kagura…or whoever…to use my body against you. So…promise me and _burn my body._ I'm pretty damn sure I won't feel it."

"Very insightful, my friend, we'll be sure to not let your body be used for evil purposes."

"Thank you…Miroku." His voice was barely above a whisper now. "I…love you guys. Tell the ol' hag…and that wimpy coward of a flea…plus your family, Kagome…the very same thing. I've never felt so accepted…by anyone before. You've all made me so happy….I'm so glad that I met all of you. Thank you…for not letting me die alone…like I thought I would…thank you…for being the best family I got."

"We…WE ALL LOVE YOU, TOO!"

"PLEASE DON'T DIE ON US!"

"I DON'T WANT TO LOSE ANOTHER ONE OF MY FAMILY!"

Miroku was the only one left who wasn't sobbing, and gave a gentle pat on Inuyasha's shoulder. "We all feel the same way for you, Inuyasha, I hope you know that. We'll be sure to carry out your final wishes."

"Thank you…" Inuyasha's eyelids began to grow heavy, and it was getting a bit difficult to take in a breath. "Could you please…also…Miroku…tell Ses…shomaru…that I'm sorry…for being such a disappointment to him…tell him that I'm…I was proud to be called his brother."

Miroku nodded.

"Kagome…" She sobbed and clutched him to her chest. He smiled. "I want to die just like this, thank you." With the last of his strength, he leaned up and kissed her tear-stained cheek. "For everything…I love you…I promise...I'll find a way…to always…be with….you."

Kagome gasped as she felt the last of his warm breath hiss onto her skin. She looked down at him, and was greeted with the dull, lifeless amber eye of Inuyasha; the beautiful amber depths, no longer showing any emotion, or sign of life. She waited with baited breath for her beloved hanyou to perhaps take another inhale, to blink, or yell at her, to make any sort of sign that his delicate soul, hidden under his scowl, hadn't been taken away from him yet.

Nothing.

Instead, his corpse grew cold and rigid.

With trembling fingertips, she closed his eye for one last time. Kissing him tenderly on his chilled lips, her body shaking…..

She exploded.

"AUGH! INUYASHA! YOU BAKA! YOU INCONSIDERATE, EGOTISTICAL, JERK! YOU…you….AHHHH! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT!" Everyone stared, as Kagome breathed heavily trying to calm herself down to some depressed level, at Inuyasha's rosary; amazingly unscathed by Naraku's devastating blast.

They waited.

And, of course, it neither glowed nor pulled Inuyasha's body to the ground.

It was as dead as he was.

Kagome cried out in despair and grief, hugging the hanyou, and rocking back and forth. The rest of the Inu pack stared sorrowfully.

"It…didn't work…?"

"His soul is gone."

Shippo hopped onto the miko's shoulder and tried his best to calm her, but soon gave in to his own tears. Sango, Kirara gripped like a shield to her chest, did as well; Kirara's sad, little mews muffled in her taijiya outfit.

Miroku, surrounded by his sobbing friends, was the only one who didn't shed a single tear. Though he felt like his heart had collapsed onto itself and he still wasn't able to swallow the painful lump in his throat. He suspected that he might never be able to do so.

_Goodbye, Inuyasha. Our dear friend._

It was hard to believe and accept.

But it was true.

Naraku had finally done it.

Inuyasha was dead.


	3. Reunion and Rebirth

**A.N Hello, everyone I'm so sorry for not updating, I've been having more fun with my other story and I was having a writer's block. I redid this third chapter like three times, but no matter how much this one sucks I'm not deleting it. So anyway here you go, enjoy.**

**Always There**

**Ch3**

He was dead.

That was almost like commenting on the weather or something, but this wasn't some little casual thing….he….was _dead!_

But he didn't feel like it, maybe which was why he didn't really…freak out when that realization hit him as he regained…consciousness? No, more like awareness, he was dead, remember? The eternal sleep, he wasn't supposed to 'wake up'.

So, when he finally gained ground of his mind, so to speak, and looked around the vast blackness he was surrounded in…his first calm thought was….

_I'm dead._

Hmmm, you know what…dying _sucked_.

There was pain, duh, but when you finally closed your eyes and listened to your heart beat getting slower…and slower, the salty smell of tears coating the inside of your nose and the warmth of arms wrapped around you…nothing spectacular…or horrible happened.

He just felt like he fell asleep and he was now having a very strange and incredibly boring dream.

He felt like at any moment, the heat of the rising sun would render away this blackness soon and he…would wake up.

He could almost smell the forest in which he, and his pack, would have camped in and the cranky half-asleep grumbles that would ring in his ears as he rudely awoken everyone up to get a head start in there jewel shard hunting.

"_No, get a hold of yourself, Inuyasha. You're dead. Do I hear me? I am dead!" _His gruff voice echoed in his head and he sank down to the invisible black floor. Even though he appeared to be floating in some dark void, he could feel solid ground beneath his feet, and his back side too it seemed as he crossed his legs and swallowed his arms in the enormity of his haori sleeves.

Nope, he still felt like he wasn't supposed to be here, that he wasn't supposed to be dead, and that he was really sleeping in rolls and rolls of bandages on the hard wood floor of Kaede's hut.

"_But…what about Naraku…and all that pain…there was no way…even with my blood that I could have survived. Ugh, that stupid bastard, I wish I could sink my claws in that damn ugly face of his…" _Inuyasha growled and cracked his knuckles.

Oh, there was another reason to add on the 'he was dead' list. His body was completely healed.

He had two arms, his chest was in one flat piece, and even his kimono looked brand new. _You see, you're dead._

There was no denying it, even though it made him so damn angry! Naraku had actually killed him! The bastard, he so wanted to get revenge!

But, he couldn't, he was dead. _I suppose I can deal with him when he comes to hell, though. _Inuyasha smirked and then sighed, dejected.

Hell…he should have been there by now. No one should really be taking so damn _long_, to go through his life, he was meant to go to hell. All the bad things he had done, stealing, being rude and cruel, killing, he was evil.

From the very beginning, he was doomed to go to hell. There he went, commenting on the weather again, he should really be feeling scared or incredulous but it was just another calm understanding that he had always known. From the first time he had awoken up with a headache and the smell of human blood on his claws, he knew he was evil.

So what was, whoever it was, waiting for!

Unless, this _was_ hell…but where was the torturous, soul damning persecution of floating in darkness, of course, it was extremely boring he could go crazy in a matter of hours…or minutes really. There was no mention of time here.

Nah, it didn't sound right to him. He felt really serene and tranquil here, like he was just waiting for something, and he should be as patient as he could for it to happen.

Wait, for what to happen? For the devil, or the reaper to come and drag his sorry ass to the depths of hell, wow he should be _really_ patient. Yeah, what was he supposed to feel so peaceful and composed about?

Whatever, his time would come soon enough. And if this was some way to teach him a lesson, well, he deserved it so…yeah, whatever.

Inuyasha sighed again and closed his eyes, just concentrating on his breathing but pretty soon his thoughts went to the most natural subject.

Kagome, her hair, her eyes, her _body_…great, now he was feeling guilty.

What will happenwhen she dies, and she comes to heaven, he wouldn't be there to greet her? He wouldn't be there to see her at least one more time, to hear about how her life went?

Of course not, there was no heaven where he was going and it was sure as hell the devil wouldn't let him see her. He was evil, she wasn't.

"_I'm sorry, Kagome. I won't be able to protect you anymore, like I promised. I won't be able to see you, or any one else from my pack again. I failed as a leader."_

"_**No, I don't think you did. I'm so proud of you my boy, you went down like a true pack leader."**_

"_**I agree we're extremely proud of you Inuyasha."**_

"_Whoa, what the hell!" _Inuyasha jumped to his feet and instinctively placed his hand onto the hilt of his sword, except for whatever reason it wasn't there. _That's right, I forgot. Tetsusaiga and my rosary didn't come with me. _He still couldn't come up with a logical reason for that one. And at the moment, he was missing the relaxing power of his sword _very_ much.

Inuyasha jumped again, racking his claws into the shadowing darkness in hope of hitting something as the echoing voices spoke up again, as if from down a long tunnel.

"**_Inuyasha! Watch your mouth, young man! Such language, he got that from you, you know"_**

"_**Yes, and another reason why I'm so proud…OUCH, honey what was that for."**_

"**_You shouldn't encourage him."_**

"_**Hey, I died before I could teach any more, you should be thankful."**_

Inuyasha's keen ears didn't miss the sound of an exasperated womanly sigh. He tried to calm the fluttery pounding of his heart and think logically.

Okay, so he died in an attempt to protect his family in a battle with Naraku.

He 'woke up' surrounded in this darkness and sitting in a huge beacon of light that acted as a circular barrier from being completely swallowed up in black.

And now he was hearing voices of apparently a couple arguing about his bad language.

Great, now he was going insane.

Taking a deep shuttering breath, he tried to keep his voice devoid of any inflection besides his usual arrogant gruffness. _"Uh…hello… I mean, who the hell are you and what are you doing here? Are you here to take me to hell or something? If…you are…well, it's about time, dammit!"_

He was answered by the woman's voice, the motherly disapproval sounded so familiar for some reason, and it also sounded _much _closer.

"_**Inuyasha, what did I say about your language! That's no way to talk to your…"**_

"**_Dear, give the poor boy a break. I mean he just died, and he hasn't seen you or me for years. Besides he's a man now, you don't need to act like this with him, we came here to talk to him not lecture him."_**

"**_Oh," _**a sigh, **_"Alright, you make a point. He has dealt with a lot of things in his life. I guess a few bad words are needed."_**

"_**Exactly."**_

Inuyasha's fine hairs on the nape of his neck stood on end, they were getting closer.

He flexed his hands and whirled around, trying to squint into the gloom. _"Could…you two…like NOT talk about me…I mean, I'm right here." _The hanyou gulped, without Tetsusaiga he felt really nervous and vulnerable.

_But you're already dead._

Yes, but habit was a hard thing to break after years of practice, he supposed. He didn't like feeling weak and exposed, even if this pair was apparently dead as well and didn't seem too dangerous.

He wanted his sword either way.

"_**I'm sorry dear, you're right. We're wasting a lot of time anyway, even though I would really like to hear about your life. I've missed you so much, puppy-kun."**_

The half-demon froze.

_Puppy-kun._

Nobody knew about that nickname of his, nobody had used it except….

Inuyasha's amber eyes widened. No, it couldn't be…but they did say they were dead…and she sounded so familiar…was it a trap…or an illusion like with Sesshomaru that one time…….well, only one way to find out.

"_M…Mom?" _He could feel the rush of blood in his ears and inhaling was getting harder to do as a figure emerged into the light with him.

Amazingly long black hair, as dark as the shadows around him, and a beautiful kimono bright and clean, flowing in thick folds down her thin form; her face was as lush and warm as he remembered it, and her violet eyes glimmered with tears.

_Just like in the village…so long ago._

"**_Hello, son, I've….I've missed you so much!" _**The woman burst into sobs as she ran up and hugged him, the strong scent of lilacs and jasmine filling his head, awakening all those memories.

His mother.

Stunned beyond coherent thought, Inuyasha brought his arms up around her and took a tentative scent. No one, not even that clay copy his brother had used against him, could do that smell justice. This was his mother.

Like a spell had been broken, Inuyasha let out short hasty exhale and squeezed her into him, burying his face into her shoulders. He became aware of a stinging in his closed eyelids and a hard painful lump in his throat that he couldn't swallow. Warmth had flown into his chest making it feel light but incredibly tight with emotion, if that was possible.

Her strong arms held him tighter and one soft hand stroked his hair, he had never felt so happy in his life…and so close to tears. His mother, his momma, she was real and here with him. He wasn't alone and she had come to see him.

Probably to lecture about his horrible choices in life, but she was there and hugging him, soothing him just like so many times in that human village when he got picked on.

God, he missed her so much. The thought that he may not see her didn't come into light in his mind, but he knew it had hovered in the back ground. The little boy inside of himself that still cried from the awful death of his mother was making himself known.

His momma was back.

Words tumbled out of his dry mouth before he even realized it, _"Oh, momma, I missed you so much……I'm so sorry for everything……I couldn't…I didn't know what……all the horrible things I've done…I'm sorry………I'm so glad you came……to see me before I left…" _He willed away the urge to cry and snuggled his face further into her colorful fabric.

"**_Oh, puppy-kun I've been watching you. I know how hard your life was, I'm so proud of you though on how you never gave up. Oh, and I'm so proud of you for what you did for your friends, my poor brave little boy. I love you so much."_** She hugged him even tighter cutting off his air a bit and more tears took over her. **_"I was so worried about you…I wasn't sure what would happen to you…I thought you could never be happy for the longest time. And then…that sweet girl came and woke you up…how she gave you a family again…how you came to care for her and the way you protected her…….dear boy, I was a little worried though about how you argued with her but then you would…"_**

"**_Honey," _**there was a rumble of manly mirth in the stranger's voice, **_"we don't have a lot of time. We all know Inuyasha and that girl, Kagome I believe, love each other dearly. And if you recall they finally told each other as much before he died, so you don't need to relive his relationship or anything."_**

Inuyasha had completely forgotten the other person and he blinked his eyes a few times and sniffed as he raised his head. His mother laughed embarrassed like, and slowly eased away from him, wiping her eyes.

"_**You're right dear, let's get on with this. We can talk later, much later. First we need to discuss a few things with…"**_

"_Who are you?" _Inuyasha stared confusedly at the, to be honest, Sesshomaru copy. Standing regally in a thick kimono, such as his brother's, the man blinked at Inuyasha surprisingly with bright amber eyes. He had long white hair, just like the two brothers', but the rest of his features were very…Sesshomaru like. A purple crescent moon adorned his forehead beneath frost fair bangs and there were two youkai stripes traveling down his cheeks from two pointed ears.

The only difference from Inuyasha's brother was the flurry of emotions in his eyes, instead of the cold ice lingering in Sesshomaru's. At the moment he seemed a little staggered by the hanyou's innocent question.

Inuyasha cocked his head to the side, released his mother, and stared unflinchingly at the man with a curious gaze. _"Why in the hell do you look like Sesshomaru? Don't tell me the bastard is making clones to take over the world…" _Inuyasha smirked to himself; he had watched way too much _tee vee_ in Kagome's time.

"**_Clones…what are you talking about…what the hell is a…?" _**The perplexed demon seemed to want to question further but quickly brought himself back to the present situation. **_"Never mind," _**He sighed and rubbed the back of his neck with a clawed hand. **_"It seems you don't remember me, ah but you were such a tiny pup when I was alive, so I guessed you wouldn't. Well, this is awkward so let's just come down to it. Inuyasha…I am your father."_**

Inuyasha immediately thought of a movie he had once seen with that line but then the information finally sunk in.

Whoa…wait… back up, his…_father!_

"_Oh…**SHIT!" **_The man smirked a very familiar looking smirk and grabbed Inuyasha by the shoulders and pulled him into a one armed hug.

"**_That a boy! Look how much you've grown and I can't believe how far you're coming along with that sword of mine. Liking it I bet, and using all those words and moves I taught you, you know you should thank me for teaching you that 'blades of blood' maneuver. Sure got you out of a few scraps a couple times didn't it?" _**He rubbed Inuyasha's hair affectionately and gave a bark of fatherly approval.

Inuyasha was stunned.

A few flashes of memory seared his brain, a deep voice and mirthful laughter, strong arms pulling him into the air, and a commanding bark whenever he got into trouble.

It was hazy and foggy but he couldn't deny it.

This was his father.

Inuyasha broke into a smile, _"No, shit."_ He said again He began to laugh, soon joined in by his father. He could see the gleeful smile on his mother's lush lips as she watched them.

"**_Oh, damn boy. You've sure made you're father proud, I can't believe though that you took the job of being a pack leader so young."_**

"_I know…I didn't really do a good job."_

"_**Are you shitting me, you were wonderful. Of course there were a few times, I had hoped you would have claimed that girl of yours to be your mate a long time ago."**_

Inuyasha's face turned bright scarlet.

"_**But the way you sacrificed yourself for your pack…yeah… you sure don't find a leader like that every day. Good job, son. I'm so proud of you; you've sure gained my respect."**_

A huge wave of warmth and pride heaved in Inuyasha's chest, his father's approval and praise, the hanyou became aware once again of the pricks in the back of his eyes. He grinned and looked admirably up at his father's glowing face.

Inuyasha's mother laughed and clapped her hands to get their attention, **_"It's wonderful to see my men together again, but didn't you tell me dear that this is no time to dilly dally, we don't have much time."_**

"**_Oh, yes, quite right honey." _**Inuyasha's father released the hanyou to allow him to straighten once again. Inuyasha looked confusedly between them.

"_You two keep saying that…what does…oh is hell ready for me now? Can I finally go? It took them long enough…"_

"_**What are you talking about, puppy-kun. You're not going to hell."**_

"_**Yes, son, you sure are way off. You're going back to Earth, not hell." **_

Inuyasha blinked, _"Wha…but I can't…I thought…what are you…?" _His mother tutt-tutted and lifted his lower jaw closed with her pointer finger.

She chuckled at his shocked look. **_"There's no need to seem so surprised, I don't know where you got the notion that you would be going to hell."_**

"_But…all the people…and the things…"_

"**_Honey, everyone makes mistakes and some of those things you did to survive. And the people you killed was under the influence of you're demon blood and to protect yourself, besides it was their destined time to go anyway."_**

"_B…but I…I don't understand…"_

His father slapped him on the back reassuringly, **_"Son, he forgives you. So stop beating yourself up right now, besides on the most part, you've paid off your debts by what you've done for your pack. And he understands how hard life is for you_** **_and what you've done and he still loves you. No matter what, so stop stammering and listen to what we have to say."_**

Inuyasha nodded and tried to quell the thousands of questions bubbling up inside of him.

_I'm going back to earth? What to life or as some ghost? Am I going to end up like Kikyou!_

"**_Okay, dear so let's explain as fast as we can. First of all, you weren't supposed to really die, be in pain for a few days yes, but somehow the blast did more damage than we originally thought and it was certain by such injuries that your body was broken beyond repair. So…"_**

"_Wait…" _Inuyasha stared at his mother,_ "I…wasn't supposed to die!"_

"**_Inuyasha hush, sometimes things don't go as plan alright? So let me finish…where was I?" _**she glanced questionably at Inuyasha' father.

"_**You weren't meant to die so early, but nothing could be helped about the severity of your wounds and besides you would have died any way if we had waited for Sesshomaru to come."**_

"_Like he would have done anything anyway." _Inuyasha's father grumbled in response, looking a little agitated.

"_**Yes, well, let's deal with that later. I believe you two care for each other more than you think anyway, what about what you said before you d—"**_

"_Mom, whatever…now didn't you say you were running out of time?"_

"_**Oh, yes, so let's just say dieing was the only option at the time and its over and done with now anyway. But you were supposed to live much longer, you see, and finish your destiny."**_

"_My…destiny?" _

"_**Yes, puppy-kun, you know rid of the world of Naraku? I thought you would have already realized that and you're supposed to marry and live happily with—"**_

"**_Honey, don't tell him his life's story, he hasn't lived it yet!" _**he sighed, **_"let me finish for you dear, so the world needs you, your family and pack needs you, that girl needs you and so you're coming back to life. Got it?"_**

Inuyasha nodded stiffly with wide eyes, _"Oh…shit……but how? I thought my body was broken beyond repair?"_

"_**It was dear, and it's already been cremated and buried anyway. So, a new body, just like your old one, is going to be made for you and in the mean time you're going to borrow a different one until it's done." **_

"_That's being done…for me? Wait…what kind of body? How long?"_

His mother shook her head a bit frantically, **_"No time. We can't stay long and chat. You'll know what body when you wake up and you'll know when you're new body is done. So let's hurry and say our goodbyes, we'll see each other again, and I hope meet that young lady friend of yours as well. I love you, son." _**She walked over and hugged him, which Inuyasha gave back just as enthusiastically, and kissed him lovingly on the forehead also tweaking his ears. She smiled, **_"I sure have missed those cute little ears of yours, be good son and make us even prouder. Help your friends also when you find them, they're not doing so well without you."_**

Inuyasha nodded as his father also gave him a fierce hug, **_"Kick that jackass Naraku to hell, son. Oh, and tell Sessho hi and I miss him, oh and also that he better be a good older brother and…"_**

Inuyasha's mother grabbed the demon's sleeve, **_"He will, honey, now come on. Puppy-kun has to take a little nap."_**

She smiled at the hanyou and Inuyasha was about to question what she meant when a dizzying wave of fatigue washed over him, he felt like he was sinking through the floor and black began to fuzzy the outlines of his vision. He felt warm and heavy but he still tried to say something before his parents would disappear.

"_**Don't worry, son, we love you too."**_

"_**Your brother too, tell him that and…"**_

"**_Honey," _**Inuyasha could see the small kiss his mother planted on his father's cheek, **_"let the boy sleep. Now, be happy son, and live your life to the fullest. We'll be waiting for you."_**

"_**Yes, we love you, pup. My son."**_

The soft voices of his beloved parents intermingled together into a lulling hum as he succumbed to slumber, the feeling of being held and rocked in a gentle embrace of warmth all the way through his transformation.

**A.N YAYAYAYAYAY! I updated and that conversation with his parents made me cry! AHHHH! Anywhoo, hope you're happy, I'll update again soon but it's a new semester so I don't know when. Stay in tune, review, and I love you!**


	4. I want to die!

**A.N Silent Hanyou has been updated! Sorry, I like that story better but I'll muddle through with this one. :sigh:**

**Always There**

**Ch.4**

They had done what he had asked. With such a detached feeling and endless fervor to keep busy that it was like all emotions had been drained from them.

At least that's what Kagome felt.

She sighed as she trudged up to the old battered well.

She was going to go tell her family today.

It wasn't going to go well, that was certain. _Poor Souta, _she swallowed against the lump forever formed in her throat for the past week and kept walking.

Visions of Inuyasha danced into her head like a blessed curse as she neared the portal that brought her to him all those months ago.

His moon white hair blowing against his peaceful face as she walked up to the seemingly asleep boy. Vines and roots wrapping around him like a snake's vise grip, as if the tree was saying 'No, don't take him away'.

His golden amber eyes flaming in a heated argument swiftly smothered in dirt as she sat him.

His melancholy face as he stared up into the sky, thinking about the love lost between his dead priestess, Kikyou.

_But he said he loves…loved me. _Kagome gave the thing closest to a smile and sat onto the lip of the well. She hadn't really smiled ever since…that day, she hadn't laughed or hardly even talked. She wasn't sleeping or eating well, and she knew that she must look like hell.

"But who cares, dammit. I don't." _Inuyasha would be so surprised to see me cussing like this…but...I can't help it…he rubbed off on me more than I knew…_Kagome sighed and looked up into the sky.

Inuyasha's body was in the village right now. Kaede and several villagers were readying his body for cremation, just like he had wanted.

She should be helping, it would be the last time she would ever see him. And she really had tried, but as she neared the cold shredded body of her lost soul mate lying on his back in silent wonder. It began to get harder to breathe and her vision wavered, her stomach flopped uneasily and all of a sudden earth greeted her.

Kaede said after she regained consciousness, that perhaps it would be better if she busied herself with something else. That's why she decided to go visit her family, even though it made her heart clench tightly.

Looking down into the dark, unyielding depths that would send her to her time, her mind wandered to the new attitudes of her once happy companions.

Shippo was getting quite a temper, snapping at everyone about everything. But she had found him sobbing by himself in the quiet of the night, wailing about how he wanted his papa. She wished she could comfort him…but she didn't know how.

Sango was the opposite. She always tried to have a smile on her face or a cheery remark. But it never reached her eyes, in her eyes she was weeping and in horrible grief. She had lost another family member and it was eating at her.

Miroku, it was surprising how deeply the monk had taken to Inuyasha's dying request, there had been no echoing slaps or womanly curses for a long time. But he had become quite depressed. There were no more smiles on the usually warm handsome face. His violet eyes had grown cold and hard. Kagome had seen him eyeing his cursed hand a lot more lately, but he didn't wander into a sulky mood for long before aiding anyone with anything no matter what it was.

They had all grown exceedingly busy during the past slowly folding days, keeping their minds on meaningless tasks to keep from wandering into painful memories.

But Kagome couldn't keep her mind from wandering, sometimes her imaginings became so real that she was shocked to come back to reality and find that Inuyasha was dead and it all wasn't true. She was going mad, but the realization didn't worry her. She would rather be in a dream with the man she loved then make it through another long day without him, working on his funeral.

_Maybe I should just get rid of the pain. I mean, people like me kill themselves all the time._

"_**Don't wallow too much in your pain, move on, and enjoy life as much as you can…"**_

His whispered words, laced with pain and a strange wisdom, echoed in her ears. Almost like he was there with her, but he's not she reminded her self, he was dead.

"You were wrong, Inuyasha, my love. I can never get rid of the pain or move on…."

"…_**try to be happy…"**_

"…or be happy, but I will live. I will keep going. I just hope I don't live long." Bowing her head, she jumped into the welcoming darkness and weightlessness.

* * *

They decided the God tree was the most perfect spot to bury him. Underneath the looming figure, its leaves blowing musically in the wind, his special place…it was perfect.

His body had been burned and was now residing in some tacky vase, that wasn't perfect, that their proud, arrogant leader was inside a jar seemed stupid and wrong. But nothing could be done, that was what he had wanted.

They walked mechanically, presents in hold to the darkness of his forest, the one named after him, the one that held him prisoner for 50 years. And now he was going to reside there for an eternity more, how ironic.

Staring up into the bare braches of the God tree, Kagome noted how depressed it looked. The tree was grieving too, with its ashy wood and drooping limbs…but it would be soon reunited with its hanyou, forever keeping it company…its baby was home.

Baby, Kagome's churning mind flashed to the visit to her family. That was what her momma had wailed when she had heard about Inuyasha's death.

"Baby, my baby is dead!"

Kagome had watched with a bland eye as her mother burst into tears, she hadn't cried like that since her father's death. It was slightly flattering in a bitter way to know that her momma had loved the hanyou so much, just like he was her own son.

Inuyasha would have liked that, he would have liked a mother, a family.

_You see, my love, people do love you, besides just me. People accepted you as a part of their family, and we all miss you. I miss you._

The vulgar jar was buried under the weathered soil beneath the tree's overhanging arms, the full moon glowing down onto the deep, respectable grave. It was done, he was dead and buried.

Under the full moon, glowing as brilliantly as his long hair, another perfect element, Inuyasha would probably damn her if they buried him under the new moon.

She had caught him several times looking up at the full moon actually, captured by its brilliance. She remembered how she had asked him why he liked looking at it. And she remembered his soft response, never once moving his gaze up at the hanging sphere.

"_**Because it never changes. I mean, it does change shape but it never leaves. It always comes back, no matter what. I like that."**_

A vulnerable moment, so rare and wonderful when it happened, those words and his surreal peaceful face was forever placed in her heart.

_I hope you always look up at the moon, Inuyasha, I hope there's one up in heaven._

Kagome came back to reality reluctantly as their personal offerings and presents were placed onto his grave one by one.

Shippo had given a beautifully drawn picture of everyone, Inuyasha in the middle in his usual crossed leg pose. All of his companions and friends, his family, all around him hugging him lovingly; all were smiling, all were happy under a bright yellow and orange sun.

Heaven.

Sango had given a perfectly woven sword string, to be able to tie his Tetsusaiga better to his waist. He would never be able to use it, his precious sword was at the moment clutched protectively against Kagome's chest, but it was the thought that counted.

He would have loved it.

Miroku had laid a regal red robe, warm, thick and dazzling; the perfect thing for winter or after a harsh battle that he could never use as well.

It was his favorite color, and he would argue that he wouldn't get cold but Kagome knew that he would have used it.

He would have loved it as well.

Kaede, looking more worn and old the past week, placed sweet smelling herbs and spices. The air now singing with the smell it gave the grave a welcoming air, it was much more welcoming then the smell of death and carnage.

With such a sensitive nose, it would have been bliss for their hanyou.

Kagome's mind trailed to that one human night after he had gotten poisoned and was close to knocking on death's door. And the way he had whispered gruffly on how she smelled nice…things were different now, he died surprisingly not on his weak stage and death's door had opened and ushered him in.

It was her turn now. She took in a deep breath and kneeled downonto the dirt.

"Hello, my love, I hope you're happy up in heaven. We're trying our best to do as youwanted but we miss you terribly. You've gotten such nice and wonderful things from everyone, now mine seems a little stupid. But I got you your second love in life, hell maybe your first," Kagome sat down several containers of ramen among the flowers.

"You always made me make you those but that's okay, they are pretty good. I love you, Inuyasha, never forget that. Oh, and everyone in my time; Momma, Souta, Grandpa, they all miss and love you too. Souta said that he always thought of you as his big brother and…and is hero. Momma thinks of you as her son, and she loves you dearly. Grandpa is being stubborn but I know he loves you too."

It was hard getting the words pass that painful lump but she went on determinedly. "I…I took off your rosary by the way, Inuyasha. I figured you wouldn't want to fall flat first up in heaven every time I say sit." She fingered the smooth pearls and fangs of the necklace lying comfortably around her neck. "I want you back…so bad, but I'll wait till I just come to you. I can't wait for that day. Everyone can't either, but we'll make sure Naraku dies and ends up burning in hell…before we do. You were…are my best friend and my only love, I'll never leave you or forget you. Oh, Inuyasha…"

It had been so long it seemed she thought she was stone dry, but tears actually welled up in her cobalt eyes and trailed down her cheeks.

Her whimpers were joined by Shippo's, Sango's, and Kaede's own tears. Like always Miroku didn't break down, he hadn't once, with a stone etched face he stepped forward.

"Let us pray." He whispered gently.

* * *

A pounding head ache and his whole body felt stiff and cold. Where the hell was he? His thoughts were sluggish and it took a while for them to pierce through the fog shrouding his mind.

Death, heaven, hell, his mom and dad, new body …ugh, so tired…why did his head hurt so badly?

His yearned to fall back into darkness…sleep sounded so good…Kagome…

Inuyasha's eyes popped open, _Kagome!_ He whimpered as his eyes stung, why were they so sensitive? He blinked a couple times and was finally able to look around at his surroundings.

He was stunned by the brilliant colors and shadows, everything was so sharp and clear, even though he knew it was the middle of the night. _What the hell?_

He tried to roll onto his arms and legs but his limbs felt like…what was that stuff in Kagome's time? Oh, that's right…jello.

Rolling onto his stomach he stretched his arms out in front of him…but they weren't arms……oh, shit they were paws!

A burst of shocked adrenaline had him on all fours and he spun in a circle to see himself. Mangy white fur, a snout with a black nose, paws with clear white claws, and shit even a tail!

He was a damn dog! A damn puppy!

He sniffed irritated. _This had to be momma's idea…_He looked up at the sky, briefly distracted by how bright it looked and shook his head. _She's probably laughing her head off…and what about my dad…_

He gave a puppy sigh and rubbed his nose with his paw, wow, he was actually growing used to this very quickly. _At least I didn't become a cat or…a girl or something…_

He shook his whole body from head to hiney and looked around, sniffing the air.

Oh, he could get used to that. His sense of smell…was brilliant!

He trotted around putting his nose onto every leaf and tree, so clear and wonderful! He could definitely learn to like this body.

And he still had the same ears, he could feel them swiveling and twitching, feeling just like on his old body. The only difference was that his hearing was even more acute. The hum of crickets, the breathing of sleeping birds and…

"Hello, my love, I hope you're happy…"

_Kagome! _He made a happy doggy yip and began sprinting to where her voice was coming from. _Kagome, Kagome, Kagome, Kagome, I can't WAIT to see you!_

He skidded to a stop when he came upon them all, the smell of depression and sadness so thick that he had the urge to sneeze. He hid himself behind some bush and watched them intently.

They all looked like hell. They seemed withered and old, like they would just want to curl up and sleep forever.

Especially Kagome, with a twinge of his heart, her hair was greasy and hadn't looked like it had been brushed for days. Her face was pale and almost hollow with sunken eyes which were now glassy and seemed like she was looking at something far away. She was incredibly skinny and her fingers were trembling slightly. _Oh, Kagome…_

"I want you back…so bad…"

_Kagome, I'm here now I won't leave you. _He wanted to go over and hug her, but he couldn't in this body and he wouldn't be able to talk to her either. He growled annoyed. _I guess I'll have to find another way to ease all their pain. _

Inuyasha glanced at everyone behind her and was distracted by the cold harshness in Miroku's eyes. Staring with an almost bored look but he had an air of…chaos around him.

_**Go ease that human's pain…he needs someone…he needs you. **Whoa, where did that come from?_ Inuyasha cocked his head to the side, it was his voice but it sounded like it was whispered. Like his conscious or…no he had heard that voice before…not quite like that because he was half human but…….now, that he was a dog, his instincts were louder and more profound. The need to go lick Miroku's face and make him smile like he used to was overwhelming…actually he wanted to do it with everyone.

Sango seemed shrouded in grief and Shippo seemed so angry and Kaede looked like she aged 50 more years. His pack was so miserable…he had to do something…

Inuyasha was about to walk out of the bushes when Miroku suddenly stepped forward.

"Let us pray." Inuyasha's ears twitched by the gentle but constricted tone of his voice. It sounded like he was trying to push something away. _What happened to the happy, go-lucky pervert I used to know? What happened to my pack?_

With sad amber eyes he watched as they all bowed their heads and Miroku mumbled some beautiful verses. Inuyasha looked as his grave and felt his throat tighten but he knew he probably couldn't cry.

They had buried him under the God tree, under the full moon, and they had given him gifts. Now, they were praying and crying.

They all missed him…they all loved him. He had always thought that when he died no one would care…he was wrong.

He was about to walk out again, having the urge to be with them, when a creak and a snap echoed in his puppy ears.

Someone was coming.

He ducked onto his stomach and watched through the bushes' leaves.

Who could it be? If they were there to attack his pack then they would be in big trouble.

The branches rustled and his pack turned, Kaede stepped forward with a sad smile.

"Why…why are you all here?"

Inuyasha was stunned beyond thought when people walked out of the foliage, carrying lanterns and gifts.

His nose was stuffed with scents…from the village…from the west…demons and humans. _Why are they here? Whoare they?_

Inuyasha's mouth hung open when Jinegi, that sweet old hanyou Kagome and he had once met, lumbered out. "We're here for Inuyasha's funeral, to pay our respects. He was a good man and a great friend."

Kouga also stepped out. _What the hell? _"Yeah, we're here to say good bye to the mutt." The wolf demon smirked but there was a small flicker of sadness in his diamond blue eyes.

Ayame, that white wolf that pined for Kouga, wrapped an arm around his waist. Kouga looked down at her and smiled. _Hopefully, he's given upon Kagome. Finally!_

Dozens of humans also made themselves known, some he recognized from the village and others he had never met in his life. All were carrying those beautiful paper lanterns and offerings of food and cloth.

They had all come…to his funeral.

A small puppy whimper came out of Inuyasha and he could feel his ears droop. He was so…touched…even that stupid mangy wolf had come. He never knew that all these people would even care…about his death.

_But…where's Sessho? _Inuyasha sighed; of course his brother wouldn't come. He was probably whooping for joy, he and Naraku.

He pushed those thoughts away; he didn't care if his own kin wasn't there or not. Everyone else was. The puppy sighed as he watched everyone bowed their heads and Miroku began to recite a prayer.

Everyone else was.

* * *

It was perfect.

Kagome wiped her eyes until no sign of moisture was present and she stared at all the many gifts lying on her love's grave. He would have been happy. He would have been so happy to know that everyone had come. Even his rival, Kagome smiled an extremely small smile.

She thought about the day Kouga had come to her, sweaty and panting from probably days of running. He had just found out about Inuyasha's death and he couldn't believe it.

It took a while to finally make the poor wolf boy to understand that Inuyasha was dead. It took Kouga on seeing his body with his own diamond eyes to comprehend the news. Kagome could never forget the shock and dismay on his face when he poked Inuyasha's decapitated arm.

"Naraku…killed him?" He whispered gruffly, his head bowed over Inuyasha's unmoving body.

"Yes, he died saving us." She stood in the doorway of Kaede's hut and twisted the hem of her shirt in her hands.

"He died like a noble pack leader, "Kouga turned with distraught and glassy eyes. "You should be very proud of him. Not a lot of demons…or humans are that brave. His name will forever be remembered. I'll make sure of that." With that said he began to walk past her before suddenly stopping and looking at her, "You loved him very much didn't you?"

Kagome choked back the rock in her throat, "Yes, very much…and he said he loved me too."

Kouga smiled, "You two would have made wonderful mates, I'm happy for you. I'm going to be there by the way…"

"Be where?"

The wolf stared straight ahead and walked on, "To his funeral of course. I may have fought with him and said I hated him…but I damn well respected him as a…fellow demon….he may not want me there…but I'm going."

Kagome watched as he went to the path heading for the forest. "I think…Inuyasha wouldn't mind having you there….thank you…Kouga."

_Ayame has been there for him…and Sango to Miroku…I'm all alone…_Kagome took a deep breath and looked up at the night sky. Velvety soft and sprinkled with stars, it was beautiful here in this time. _I don't think I'll want to leave…I'll put the jewel together…and we'll destroy Naraku…and I'll stay here…_

Kagome had once thought on just wishing on the jewel to having Inuyasha come back once it was whole and pure…but she knew that wouldn't work. Inuyasha wouldn't have liked that and the jewel only created torment and chaos…it would have done something wrong.

_It could…make him like Kikyou…_Kikyou; the priestess hadn't come to the funeral. Kagome figured either she was happy Inuyasha was dead or was too grief stricken to come. _Or maybe she didn't feel welcome…maybe she feels guilty or angry or…ah, hell who cares…_

She touched a soft petal of many a flowers adorning Inuyasha's grave. It smelled heavenly and soft and Kagome's ears were still ringing with the soft funeral music played in mourning for the hanyou.

It was perfect…and it was over.

He was gone…and life would go on.

"Inuyasha…I need you. I miss you and want you here with me…Inuyasha I don't feel safe anymore…I can't eat, I can't sleep, and I'm going insane…" Kagome lay amid the presents and rubbed the soil with trembling fingers. Her love was underneath this dirt, underneath the mud and the grime.

She was alone, everyone had left a long time ago, and the night was growing cold and was ticking away to morning. She didn't feel tired.

"Please come back to me…I need you….I love you…I want you back!" She pounded the ground with her fist and curled up into a little ball. "Come back, come back, come back…I need you…Inuyasha….I miss your ears…your eyes…and your hair…I miss arguing with you and watching you sleep…I want to hold you…and kiss you……Inuyasha…."

Her eyes stung and her throat was tightening so bad she wondered when she would taste the metallic wine of her blood.

She was dying…this is what it felt to die. Her body and her mind were withering away…her heart and her soul was in so much pain…she had to be dying.

"I want to die…I want to be with you…." She stood up on her knees and lifted her arms to the air, welcoming a lightning strike or a tree to crush her. "Kill me…God dammit! KILL ME! I WANT TO DIE!"

She flung her head back and her tears mixed with the dirt on her cheeks, "Please…I don't want to live anymore…it's only been a week…and I can't take the pain…and the loneliness…kill me…give me salvation…and make it go away…kill me…" Kagome sobbed and buried her head in her arms. "Kill me…I want to die…"

Inuyasha wanted to cry, his heart was hurting so bad that he knew the only way to ease it would be to cry. But dogs can't do that…that was one disadvantage. _Kagome…_he whimpered and walked slowly over to her shaking form. _I want to hold you…I want to kiss you…I want to make all your pain go away…but you have to be patient…I have to be patient……my body will then be finished and I promise you that I'll never let you go…I'll kiss you and hug you and rock you to sleep every night……I'll make all this pain evaporate into thin air…just please wait for me…_

He kneeled beside her and crawled on his belly, making his way to her arms he whimpered again and nuzzled it with his nose. _I'll make it go away…_

Kagome jumped when she heard the soft pleading sound and she reared up looking around frantically. She felt something cold and wet snuggle against her hand and she looked down.

Two amber eyes looked back. Her heart stopped, they were the same eyes that she dreamed about, that she missed so dearly.

But it wasn't him…it was just some puppy. He was covered with dirt but you couldn't miss the shiny white fur coat that covered him, it gleamed just like the long locks she missed as well. His paws her small and soft but adorned with sharp looking claws and he had a cute little tail that wagged a bit as she smiled softly. She looked into his eyes and was amazed by the intelligences that shone in them, there was also a look of relief as if he was happy that she wasn't crying any more and pleading for her death.

Two ears, standing upright instead of drooping, twitched adorably atop his head. _Just like Inuyasha's…they look just like his…and his eyes…and his hair…it's a puppy version of my love…_

Her eyes welled up with tears again and the puppy jumped up in alarm, frantically licking her face. _Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry, don't cry…please don't cry…_

Kagome wrapped her arms around the little puppy and placed her on his lap, he looked up at her with concerned amber orbs. She rubbed his head affectionately and he gave a doggy grin, leaning into her palm. "Hello, little fella, why are you here." She gazed at the grave behind him, "Coming…to pay your respects as well…" The puppy nosed her chin upward, as if saying 'perk up, it'll be okay'.

She smiled down at him and then hugged him fiercely to her chest, "We buried him today, "she croaked into his fur, "we burned him till nothing of him was left and we placed him in some stupid God damn jar. Naraku, that damn bastard, killed my love and now I have to live the rest of my life without him. I never got to kiss him, or marry him, or have children with him."

Inuyasha was sure he was blushing. Maybe fur was a good thing. He snuggled into her and gave little whines, licking her neck and face.

"I lost him…I couldn't save him…it's not fair. Inuyasha should have lived…we need him the most!"

_I'm right here Kagome, I'm going to come back...please stop crying…_

Kagome trembled and her breathing was choked and quick, Inuyasha didn't know what to do. **_Just be there for her, let her talk, let her give you her troubles, take away the pain by being there for her…_**Inuyasha nodded and thanked the stars for instincts and let Kagome hug him tightly, not trying to get away or to make her stop. She had to let it out. He had to be there for her, to take her troubles away.

And pretty soon, Kagome did slow down in her sobbing and now was just stroking his fur and wiping her eyes. _That a girl…all better?_ He licked her chin, she tasted like dirt, salt, and a warm mix of vanilla and cinnamon.

Kagome chuckled lightly and rubbed his ears, "I'm sorry boy. I thought it was all over. I thought I was dry to the bone but it seems I still have some tears left in me. Thanks for being there for me, though, I probably freaked you out didn't I?" Inuyasha nodded and she gave another soft smile. "You look a lot like him, you know. The same ears, hair color…and eyes…I love your eyes the most." She sighed and stroked his snout, "So, what's your name boy? Where are you from? Do you have a home?"

Inuyasha shook his head and snuggled closer to her, God, he missed her so much. "You sure are smart…I guess I'll keep you then. Would you like that? Staying with me?"

_Duh! _Inuyasha barked happily and covered her with doggy kisses. "Okay, okay! I get it!" She batted him away and Inuyasha's heart glowed by her little smile. Not like before but it was a start. "Now, what to call you…hmmm."

_Well, he does look a lot like…my love. And he is a dog…_

"How about Yasha? Do you like that?" She was rewarded by another puppy kiss. "Okay then, let's take you home. You seem cold and hungry." She stood up and cradled him to her chest like a precious baby.

Inuyasha sighed happily and made himself comfortable, soaking in her warmth and her heavenly scent. _It'll all go well in the end, Kagome…I'll be back soon…in the mean time I have a lot of work on my hands…I mean paws…_

His instincts were bugging him non stop to make his pack happy. He had to get his old friends back; he couldn't stand seeing them so sad and miserable. It was pissing him off to no end.

But first things first, he wanted to take a little cat nap. Ha, a joke. Inuyasha closed his eyes and welcomed the coming sleep, finally heading home.

**A.N I didn't know how to end it and I know that's stupid but whatever. I hope you guys like it, I know it's an old story line, him as a dog. I actually like the idea of him becoming a wolf and part of Kouga's pack, but this was in my head for a long time so I went with it. Please review and if you guys are depressed (I was crying non stop on this chapter) then read my other story the SILENT HANYOU, that one's cute and heart warming. From what I've been told. Till next time!**


	5. A son's cries

**Always There**

**Ch.5**

The hut was shrouded in a cloud of depression and sadness, so thick and unyielding that the occupants inside felt like they had all suffered this curse for so long that there was no such thing as happiness and smiles. That didn't exist anymore, they could never be truly happy again, they just had to keep going. Kill Naraku, get rid of the jewel, and then wither into nothingness.

A week down…the rest of their lives to go.

Orange and yellow flames licked and crackled gleefully, eating at the wood with a greedy intensity. They all stared into the hypnotizing light with hard, sightless eyes. Dried tears streaked down most of their cheeks and no one spoke or made a move to really eat the soup placed in front of them. They couldn't taste it anyway.

Shippo was sitting cross legged in a favored corner of his deceased papa and had an indifferent mask marring his once happy face. Torn and shredded pieces of scribbled drawings and broken crayons littered the wooden floor around him but no one scolded him or pushed him to clean it up.

Sango had her precious boomerang lying on her lap and a polishing rag clenched forgotten in her slender fingers. Her cheek was resting against the hard demon bone stroking the fur of Kilala with a distracted and mechanical motion.

Kaede was rubbing a ripped piece of red cloth in her old wrinkly hands. A needle and thread held in one hand, the other petting the cloth like it was a beautiful masterpiece.

It was once Inuyasha's proud and vibrant red haori.

Miroku was clenching and unclenching his beaded, cursed hand; his forehead resting against the cool metal of his staff, lying against his shoulder. He seemed restless but made no effort to move or say some words of encouragement that he once said so well. He had hardly said a word…since…that day.

No one moved, no one lifted their head or flicked their eyes or gave a polite friendly greeting as Kagome walked into the hut, the makeshift flap ruffling and slapping the wood behind her.

Kagome sighed as she came into the room from hell. No longer rumbling with laughter and pleasant conversations, bedtime stories or slap-and-grope-a-thons; it would never be that way again. She looked down at the little puppy, conked out in her arms and she had the sudden urge to end the silence. She had made no move to do that for so long it seemed but she knew that it was desperately needed to right now. If she didn't, the silence would surely send her to an early insanity.

"Hey guys," she whispered thickly, "look what I found." No one moved and a tiny flicker of irritation erupted to life within her.

She walked into the middle of the room and sat down. "You guys," she raised her voice a fraction louder, "listen to me!" They all jumped as if finally registering that she was there, which really they had, and instantly looked down at the slumbering puppy tucked in her chest.

Sango leaned forward and smiled slightly, that same fake smile she had used for the past week, "Oh, what a cute little puppy. Where did you find him, Kagome?"

"At In…I mean I found him in the forest. Isn't he cute?"

"No, he's just some mangy mutt." Shippo growled gruffly and sulked farther into the corner. Kagome frowned at him with sad eyes, the poor kit.

Kaede made her away next to Kagome and stroked the pup's ear, making it twitch. Yasha snorted and snuggled to a more comfortable position. "He looks like a stray and so young but his age is hard to figure. What have ye decided to call him, Kagome?"

The girl sighed once again, turning her melancholy eyes down on the dog. "Yasha," she murmured.

Shippo snorted, "Feh, that's original."

"Shippo, shush." Miroku whispered in a soft dangerous voice, devoid of all emotion, "That's a very nice name, Kagome."

Kagome tilted her head towards him in appreciation, "Thank you, Miroku."

He nodded but did not smile, instead turning his violet gaze back onto his hand.

Yasha suddenly squirmed and opened his eyes. Sango and Kaede gasped, irking the other's curiosity, as Shippo and Miroku walked over to see what was so amazing.

They all fell in shocked silence, and Inuyasha stared at them with confused amber orbs, the meaning of everyone's stunned faces. _What the hell's wrong with them?_

"He has the same…" Shippo started.

"His eyes…and his ears…"

"His fur as well…" Sango and Miroku exchanged startled glances.

"He's cute isn't he?" Kagome patted the top of Yasha's head in slight pride.

"Very…quite shocking actually," Kaede whispered. Inuyasha rolled his eyes and stretched his paws out in front of him, giving a mighty yawn. Sitting up tall, he cast his gaze upon his pack in the quizzical air of a leader.

_You all look like shit, you know that?_ Inuyasha trotted off Kagome's lap and walked around them, sniffing and eyeing them in a strangely judging way.

Then a powerful rush of excitement and joy of finally seeing his pack seized him uncharacteristically and he tried to suppress it…but with no avail.

_Ah, what the hell_... he yipped and bounded after each and every one of them. Jumping onto their laps, licking their faces, his little tail wagging, and then he would go to the next person. They were all stunned as the puppy bounced and barked happily, making his way to Shippo…who was up and ready. With a surprising strength, Shippo�pushed him away.

With his momentum he was running, Inuyasha rolled on the floor by Shippo's attack. Yasha growled and hopped to his feet, glaring at Shippo who just glared right back. _What the hell you little brat? What was that for? _He snarled and walked towards the kit cautiously, sniffing and not breaking eye contact.

His pup's emerald green eyes were blazing with fury…and pain. Inuyasha was momentarily distracted and stopped in his tracks. **_He's sad…and he's blocking the pain with anger…you have to help…soften him…he needs you…your pup needs you…_**Yasha's eyes softened and he trotted toward the kit with determination…to make the pain go away.

Shippo growled and backed away, "Go away, you stupid dog! Leave me alone!" Inuyasha snorted and came closer. "No, you leave me alone," out of nowhere the kitsune slashed out his claws and missed mere inches of striking Inuyasha's nose.

Everyone gasped and Kagome shrieked but the only means of the hanyou's surprise was a hardened glare and several blinks. Inuyasha snorted at the panting Shippo, who fell into shadow of his corner, and walked back to Kagome, eyeing his pup with a determined gaze. _I'll deal with you later……son…_

As he neared the distraught girl, he suddenly felt a weird hum fall over his body. He slowed and rubbed his nose with his paw, but the trembling only increased. His fur stood on end and he couldn't quell the small tremors of every muscle in his body. _What the—_

"Oh my God, look at the rosary!" Everyone gaped as the black wooden beads began to lightly glow pink and was lifting off Kagome's chest. Inuyasha yipped as suddenly the necklace broke into dozens of floating pieces and dashed towards him like comets. His head flung from side to side as they all fitted together into a circle around his neck….

This looked familiar.

As the light faded a well-known and actually missed weight fell onto his chest. Inuyasha looked down…his rosary was back. _Oh, wonderful…_he scratched the back of his neck with a hind leg and sighed, trotting over to sit in a shocked Kagome's lap.

"Wh-why did that happen, Kaede?" Sango asked with wide eyes as Yasha curled up into a ball.

"I…don't know…it should only work for…"

"Inuyasha," Miroku stated with a bland tone.

"Yes…"

"Than why did it…go around Yasha's neck?" Kagome asked, stroking the back of a content little puppy.

_I know. It's because it's for my soul only and now I'm back. But you better not say 'sit' dammit, I can't even talk._

"That…I'm afraid I will never figure out?" Kaede sighed, "Come, it is time to go to sleep. It's…been a long day."

Everyone nodded dejected and readied themselves for bed, Kaede dousing the fire. It's hissing of pain and costly demise of losing its light pierced their ears, while they laid themselves down on mats and in sleeping bags; a puppy taking a kit's place next to Kagome's side.

* * *

Inuyasha waited as patiently as he could as he listened to everyone's breathing slowing and deepening into slumber. Kagome's tight hold around his waist lessened to the point that he could easily inch out of her grasp without waking her, she whimpered at the loss of his heat and he licked her chin gently. _I'll be back…I have to see Shippo first. _

Looking around in the gloom of the moon and dying embers still trying to spring to life one last time, Inuyasha finally was satisfied that everyone was in dreamland. His claws clicked on the hard wood floor as he made his way towards his favorite corner, the small breathing of Shippo reaching his ears. _My poor annoying little pup…_Inuyasha paused as he smelled a fog of salt around the little demon. A single tear glistened on his cheek by the night's glow and Inuyasha's heart tightened.

Inuyasha resumed tip toeing as well as his newly acquired paws could allow him towards the, he knew, wide awake Shippo. He could see the twinkle of the kit's emerald eyes welling up with silent tears, his body shuddering with controlled sobs and he gripped something close to his chest.

The Tetsusaiga, Yasha had almost forgotten that. Thank god it was safe. His head cocked to the side as he saw something else also clutched protectively in Shippo's arms.

Inuyasha's eyes clouded in memory and slight confusion of where the demon child could have apprehended it. The small yellow and red striped ball given to him by his mother, his favorite and most cherished toy, which had resided lovingly in the confines of his kimono. He was astonished that it had survived Naraku's blast.

Shippo held onto these two items in a death grip and the hanyou was certain he would fight to the death to protect them. Inuyasha gave a doggy smile and resumed walking over to his side.

The kit didn't move or alter his hollowed gaze from the wall as he spoke harshly, "Go away, dog. I don't want you, leave me alone, or I won't feel sorry if I rip you to shreds." He glared angrily and growled as Inuyasha only moved closer. "I mean it, _Yasha."_

_I've already died once so far…and I know you wouldn't. My Shippo wouldn't be like this…you're in horrible grief for no reason…just let me help you…_like he had anticipated Shippo didn't attack or even move as he finally reached his side. Inuyasha sat and watched him; he would be patient on getting any closer. He would wait till Shippo had said what he needed to say, just like Kagome had.

It didn't take long.

"You don't deserve that name, you know." His voice was soft and bitter, "You don't deserve to have _my papa's name!"_ Shippo at last turned to look at the hanyou, and Inuyasha was at a lost for words by the grief and sorrow in his eyes. Once shining in mischief and joy but now…Inuyasha wanted the old Shippo back. "My papa was a great demon and you're some mutt, you shouldn't even bark that name! He was a hero…and he died saving us…you don't deserve it…" Shippo hugged the sword and ball tighter and muffled his sobs in his skinny arms.

Inuyasha took the chance when he was busy to come to his side. The dog nosed his arm and when Shippo didn't kick him away, Inuyasha laid down beside him and nuzzled his way to the kit's chest. Shippo gave a high choked sound and suddenly gripped the hanyou tightly to him, the other belongings forgotten. _That a boy, Shippo, now talk to me…get it off your chest…I'm right here…_

"I miss my papa! I've lost two daddies now and it's not fair! I want Inuyasha back! I want my daddy back!" Shippo couldn't control his crying no longer and in a panic of waking the others, bounded to his feet and fled out of the hut; Inuyasha hot on his trail.

Shippo ran for a time in the sweet piercing night air until he slipped in the dew and fell face first in the grass. He shivered and curled into a little ball, wailing into the ground. Inuyasha huffed to him and snuggled back through his arms to get to his chest. _It's okay to cry, Shippo…let it all out…give me your pain…_Shippo buried his face in the dog's coarse white hair and shed a waterfall of a week's pain and loneliness.

"There was…so much blood…and I hated that damn smell……I thought he could make it…like all those other times. He…actually called me his son…and then…oh God and then…" Shippo screamed in grieving agony. "My papa's gone! And I watched them burn his body!"

Inuyasha stilled. _Oh shit, oh damn, you didn't…_

"Those bastards acted like they didn't care! Setting fire to my papa like that…make…making him disappear forever…I couldn't stand it…" All of a sudden, probably reliving the horrible images of a body burning to ashes, Shippo's body trembled and then he graced the ground with the little food and fluid left in his stomach from the past week. Inuyasha whimpered as Shippo held his abdomen and panted, doing it once more before collapsing in the dirt.

_How in the hell…why did you watch something like that…who was watching you? Oh shit, my pup, my poor son…_Inuyasha whimpered again and laid next to Shippo, having his body heat warm the shaking kitsune. He nosed his neck and snuggled closer.

"I love my papa, Yasha…and I want him back. I miss teasing him and arguing with him…I wish…we had become more like father and son…before…he died. I wish…he was still here…papa…" Shippo eyes suddenly drifted closed, with sobs chocking in his throat�and pretty soon he had succumbed to an exhausted sleep.

Inuyasha wished once again that he could cry. He knew how Shippo felt, once dealing with the same pain of watching his own mother die, and he wished that he also had treated the kit more like a son when he was alive. _But I will when I come back…I'll become like a true father to you Shippo…I promise…I won't let you suffer in this pain…I'll always be there for you…_

Inuyasha didn't sleep the whole time he was with Shippo, even as the warmth of the morning rays kissed his fur. He stayed by his side…to protect his son…like the father he wanted to become and Shippo slept peacefully for the first time since…that day and if you looked carefully there was a soft smile�lingering on his face as he dreamed happy dreams and was unknowingly being guarded by his papa.

**A.N. I cried yet again. My nose is runny, I need a tissue, and I'm trying to not wake up my family. I can't believe I'm so evil, I wish Shippo was real and I could hug him or at least have Inu talk so he could help him. Oh, it's real bad when the author cries! You all hate me don't you? I know I hate myself. Oh, poor Shippo, I should have a box of Kleenex next to my computer from now on. Excuse me…oh, and please review. :blows nose and then sobs some more:**


	6. It's all your fault

**A.N Okay, before I begin I must say thank you to all my wonderful reviewers, I thought for certain you all hated me after the second chapter but you all stuck with me. My deepest thanks and I hope you all keep reviewing, it makes a heart swell. Also, I've had some confusion with a few readers so let me clarify, Inu does not have a real 'pack' I was referring to the instinctive trait of him calling his companions, his friends, as his pack. From what I gather Inu has been alone all his life and even though they aren't the same species, Inu calls his friends his pack. Okay, it's confusing but don't fret about it, so now onward to chapter six.**

**Always There**

**Ch.6**

It was becoming a very slow effort but Inuyasha, to much personal pride; felt that he was taking great leaps and bounds on cheering his pack up. He couldn't miss how they didn't seem as enthusiastic towards things like when he was alive but he thought for certain that they had gotten better. Shippo didn't snap as much and Kagome was smiling more, but it was starting to worry him how much she was daydreaming. He'd have to figure out a way to solve that little problem later but first, it was the next person on his list; Sango.

He sat and watched with a keen eye as the taijiya in question was helping to build a village hut. The hanyou noticed right away the strict mental concentration she put into her work of hammering and sawing, as if it was the most fascinating and important thing in the world; a clear indicator that she was pushing against any other thoughts and feelings. His next observation was that damn annoying happy, perky attitude she would display in front of everyone, the one where she smiled and laughed a choked laugh but her dark brown eyes were hazy with hurt.

It definitely was pissing him off.

Sango suddenly dropped the hammer to the ground in a huff and then fell to one knee, breathing hard. She was drenching in sweat and her face had gone pale. Inuyasha rolled his eyes and hurried over to grab a flask filled with water and dragged it over to the over worked and dehydrated warrior.

He gave a puppy whine that he had experimented with to perfection the past few days and nudged her hand. Sango smiled down at him and guzzled the thanked fluid greedily. "Oh, thank you boy," she wiped her mouth, "I guess I tired myself out."

_Duh, you stupid wench, I can't have you passing out when we finally continue our journey. You better drink all of that. _He growled when she was about to pick up the hammer.

Sango sighed, "Okay, Yasha, I get it. I'll take a break." She laid her back against the finished wall and drank the rest of the flask's contents with a slower digression. Inuyasha grinned and settled on his back beside her, showing his flank for attention.

Another thing he had learned…tummy rubs were _amazing._

The taijiya chuckled and lazily stroked her hand on Inuyasha's soft stomach, earning a happy little grunt from the puppy. Sango trailed her fingers in little circles in his pure white fur when it seemed the silence was getting to her and she started to talk.

Inuyasha smirked, his plan had worked. He had come to find that the quickest way to get everyone to get on with life was to talk their brains out, maybe cry, and then they acted as if a horrendous weight had been lifted off of their shoulders. Kagome wasn't there yet, she still seemed a bit depressed, but it definitely worked a few noticeable wonders with Kaede and Shippo. Now, it was Sango's turn, then Miroku's. Inuyasha had decided to keep him last; he looked like a challenge and the most filled……with chaos, whatever reason that might be.

"You've been quite a miracle, you know that Yasha? Everyone was such a mess before you came. Now…it seems…almost back to normal."

_That's my plan._

Then Sango sighed, a heart felt, tragic sigh. "But it will never be the same…never again. It's strange how easy it was to…I guess overlook Inuyasha. He was just…always there, either sitting in a tree or eating a bowl of ramen," Sango chuckled reminiscently, "or arguing with someone……or protecting…all of us. He was so important, but I never…thought about how much. Now, that he's gone…..I don't…feel safe anymore."

Inuyasha opened his eyes in slight surprise. _You don't feel safe…?_

Sango gaze turned pained as she stared off to the middle distance, "I've always been the older sister, taking care of my younger brother and being the responsible one. But then…I joined this group…became a part of this family…….and Inuyasha….became my older brother. He took care of everyone…like an older brother, protected everyone and took all the responsibility of being the leader of our…pack. He watched everyone at night, saved us all from I don't know how many dangers……I always felt safe knowing that he would be there."

A faint trace of salt licked his nose and Inuyasha placed his head on her knee, staring up at her with awed amber eyes. _An older brother……_

Sango rubbed at her eyes but it was of no use. "I…I, ah…I don't feel safe anymore. I keep thinking that Inuyasha is really sitting in a tree somewhere and watching for danger…..but he's not…._he's dead_ and now we're all alone. No one could ever take his place, no one…..we're all alone. Everything seems so…bleak now. I didn't know how much….we…we…_loved him!"_ Sango shut her eyes tight as tears squeezed out of their corners, laying her head on the back of the wall, her chest began to hiccup with sobs.

Inuyasha sat on her lap and licked her chin. Sango wrapped her arms around him, like so many others had, and more tears came. "It's selfish….but I don't want the responsibility……I want Inuyasha to do it…like he did so well……I feel so awful that we never said thank you or something….it must have been so hard…we…we took advantage of him. Inuyasha…..why do I keep losing more and more members of my family? Why?"

The hanyou pup sighed through his nose and snuggled into her chest. _I wish I could talk…yeah, but I'd probably say the wrong thing……Sango, my family…I had no idea you would all act this way…feel so strongly……damn, when is my body going to be finished?_

Sango took some deep breaths and finally straightened, smiling down at the pup as she wiped her eyes. "Sorry, but I bet you're used to it though, huh? It's a bit surprising how much you look like him,' she rubbed his ear and then gazed off to the side. "I miss Inuyasha…but life does have to go on. We have to get our revenge on that damn bastard, Naraku," her hand clenched, "and we also have to get rid of the jewel. I've dealt with deaths before…the pain should lessen soon."

Inuyasha nodded gratefully and licked her cheek, the girl laughed. "You really are a miracle….Hey…Have you done…Miroku yet, Yasha?" Sango sighed and a single tear trailed down her cheek, "I think he's the one you should help next…and most of all…besides Kagome that is. It must have been so hard for her….I should really be there for her, since I'm her friend. I've been so depressed lately…and I didn't know what to say. I can't be all, 'oh, the man you loved is gone and is never coming back so get over it'." She chuckled dryly, "I've been so horrible….I haven't even tried to help Miroku either…and he seems to be in so much pain. He hasn't groped me at all since….and none of the other women in the village too."

Inuyasha eyes narrowed speculatively. _Oh, really…that's amazing…_

"…_**stop being such a lech…"**_

_Is he really…trying to follow what I said….is that why he's so depressed. No…it's something more…something worse than a lost 'hobby'._

The taijiya sighed and pushed Inuyasha off her lap, petting his head lovingly, "Well, thanks for listening Yasha, you're a good dog. Now, I better get back to work. I'll find Kagome later…and maybe ask her to go bathing with me, like before…that'll be nice. I don't think Miroku would follow us…there's something wrong with him…can you do me a favor Yasha…and help Miroku? You can't talk but you have no idea how nice it is just to have someone there."

She ruffled his hair once more before picking up her hammer and setting back to work. _I'll always be here Sango, for all of you. Now, to find Miroku…get ready monk, you're next. _Yasha sniffed and scratched his ear with his hind leg and trotted down the road, several villagers taking the time to pet him and give him treats, as he looked around for the once perverted monk.

* * *

The night air was brisk and cruel as it slapped against his pale skin, playing with the many thick folds of his kimono. The damp dark grass crunched by the added weight as he silently walked through the forest, branches seemed to bend for him and the moon brightened a clear white path to his destination.

He still couldn't make himself believe it, though his nose never lied when that thick disgusting stench had floated along the wind. But he had to see it for himself; he had to see if it was true.

It was silent as he came upon the grave. A tense silence as his golden eyes raked down the wilting flowers and rotting food littering the soil around a makeshift stone etched with fluid characters of his brother's name.

A cold claw eased at his insides, he was used to that feeling of winter chill, but this time it shivered all the way through his limbs freezing his very regal blood to the core.

His younger brother was dead.

Sesshomaru stood absolutely still not even swaying by the night wind or locked knees and he stayed there for an unknown time just staring at Inuyasha's final resting place.

Inuyasha was dead.

He had never been this close to shock and the small flickers of unidentified emotions deep inside himself had him blink in curiosity.

He gripped the hilt of his Tenseiga, the only movement he had made thus far, and waited another tense moment. He didn't know why he wanted to feel his sword's pulse, the notion that there was still a soul and he could bring the dead back to the living, and he didn't understand another unsettling feeling that weighed down in his gut.

The sword had remained silent and that only meant one thing.

Inuyasha was really gone and Sesshomaru couldn't bring him back.

But why did he even want to bring his useless half brother back anyway?

_Because I was not the one who ended his life. _It was a simple answer and it eased the feelings back into the hard arctic place he had created for them all those years ago. It was only disappointment that was the only thing, he wanted to rid of the world of his bastard brother and he had not succeeded.

Naraku had.

Sesshomaru's nose was still coated by the unrelenting reek of that pathetic demon mixed with the scent of death and Inuyasha's blood. Naraku had actually killed him and for some reason that irked him.

But only because he was not the one to kill Inuyasha, that was the _only reason_.

"You failed little brother. Always so cocky and arrogant but you let such a pathetic demon, even more than yourself, to destroy you." The royal dog demon spoke passively with a bland face as always.

"I thought you said you were strong but it was only arrogant talk. You've proved that you really are not worthy of father's blood." His hand around the hilt of his sword was growing tense and even paler.

"You were weak, just like your mother, a worthless human." Sesshomaru's chilling voice was tight and his golden eyes pooled with red. "I was supposed to kill you. Inuyasha, you wretched hanyou, you stupid half breed, _you weren't supposed to die!"_

Wood splintered and cracked as the demon gave in to the quick burst of rage, an unfortunate branch littering the ground. Sesshomaru blinked and straightened gracefully, willing his eyes to flicker back to amber and his cool façade to fall back to place.

Somehow…an emotion had broken free of that cold dark place within him. But anger was allowed…it was the other feelings…that would destroy him…those were kept under lock and key. However, he could feel them raging and churning within him, like a thunderous storm urging to break free. He had to keep them under strong rein, he was not to ever show emotion besides anger or hatred…it was unacceptable.

Willing his hand to relax from Tenseiga's hilt he gave an inaudible sigh, the air whisking past his nostrils.

He knew he was there long before he made himself known.

"Do you know the details of how your brother died, Sesshomaru?" Miroku asked calmly, no hint of fear or anxiety given away in his now haunted violet gaze. He almost looked like the dog demon himself. The monk's staff jingled eerily as he walked towards Sesshomaru. "Do you know what happened on that desolate battle field?"

Sesshomaru didn't spare a single glance towards his brother's companion. "I know…what my nose told me. Naraku has succeeded in killing Inuyasha. It is proof by what we're standing before."

Miroku stopped off to the side of him and gazed thoughtfully and a hint of sadness at the hanyou's grave. "It is true…Naraku did succeed in killing him but it was not in the way you have believed it to be."

"And what is that, monk?" Sesshomaru turned, not able to stare at the gravestone no longer.

Miroku met his eyes unflinchingly and he held contact with him as he spoke. "What are the qualities of a pack leader, Sesshomaru? What are the holy and noble requirements of a great dog demon leader, such as your father, I am told."

The demon was momentarily taken aback by the question though he did not show it. "An honorable pack leader for my kind would be someone who is brave and would willingly go into battle for his pack, to protect them with his own life."

"Would you respect anyone that would have done that?" Miroku's eyes were sparkling with a fine regret and wisdom. He looked much older than his true young age.

Sesshomaru didn't hesitate and there was no flinch in his emotionless voice, "Yes."

The monk nodded, satisfied with something unknown to the dog demon and looked back at the grave. "Would you like to know the whole story of how…your younger brother met his end?"

"You would tell me either way."

Miroku gave akin to something of a smile, but it was really only a ghostly twist of his mouth. "True, but will you listen?"

"Yes, monk, now speak." He was staring to grow irritated with all these questions and riddles.

Miroku sighed and turned completely to stand in front of Inuyasha's burial place; he closed his eyes and muttered a quick prayer before talking. His voice sounded far away and his hooded eyes stared to the middle distance. "It was meant to be the final battle…we were doing so well…..Naraku had his moments but we were all holding our own…especially Inuyasha. I believe your father would have been proud of how well Inuyasha can," Miroku cleared his throat, "…could handle his bequeathed sword."

"It should have gone to me."

The monk gave another sigh, "But it did not, and you should accept that. Now, to get on with the story…no matter how painful it is…Inuyasha was about to deliver the final blow with his wind scar when Naraku…distracted him…"

Sesshomaru's gaze narrowed, "Inuyasha got distracted in battle," it was more of a bitter statement than a question, "he was pathetic…"

Miroku spun at him with fire flaming in his eyes and he stalked to his front, "_Don't you dare to ever call Inuyasha pathetic! Or I will feel no hesitation to suck you into my hand!"_

Sesshomaru's eyes once more flashed red, "He was pathetic! A weak excuse for a demon! He was not worthy of carrying my father's blood or his sword!"

Miroku showed no fear of Sesshomaru's demon strength or the fact that he could easily kill him, "You said you would respect any demon that would die for his pack in the heat of battle! To protect his family with his very life! Didn't you!"

"Yes, I did…!"

"Well, let me tell you what really happened on that God damn battle field! Naraku tricked my dear friend, he predicted what noble thing Inuyasha would do if anyone was threatened from his pack, and he used that to his advantage! _Naraku, that God damn bastard was going to kill us but Inuyasha jumped in front of the blast!"_

Sesshomaru's words he was about to utter died in his throat, leaving his mouth slightly parted, the only hint of the bone shattering shock he was feeling. "What…"

Miroku was shaking from his rage and pain, his eyes glassy and shrouded with regret, guilt, and grief. "Inuyasha died by the wounds he received by saving us, by _protecting his pack._ He died because of his love for us!" Miroku smiled cynically, "So…do you respect him, Sesshomaru? Do you respect that pathetic half demon…that _hanyou_ you bitterly call brother…who died as honorably and bravely as your father!"

Sesshomaru didn't answer, his amber eyes flicking to Inuyasha's grave. It couldn't be true…Inuyasha was a sad excuse for a demon…tainted and filthy by human blood……but he actually risked and _lost_ his life to the protection of his pack. Could he really respect that his half brother, which he despised and hated to his very being, had died more bravely than any demon? Who had been a better pack leader than most that had ever lived? Could he get past his age old hatred to come to respect his younger half brother?

He was brought back to reality by Miroku's next words, the haunted and stone etched mask again firmly plastered onto his face. "Would you like to hear another thing about your brother? Would you like to hear what he told me to tell you while his life's blood was draining from his body and the Great Spirit was calling for his soul?"

Miroku went on without any indication that Sesshomaru really wanted to know.

"You both hated each other to the very depths of your being, and you didn't pause on showing it. You always had a reason, a stupid one, but a reason none the less but Inuyasha, however, only seemed to hate you because you hated him. His life was hard and cruel…you should have been there…you should have been his older brother," Miroku glared at the now passive Sesshomaru but you could just see the hint of the storm raging in his golden eyes, "He needed an older brother…_you_ were the one that failed _him_…..but even so, Inuyasha did something remarkable while he was dying…he asked me…to tell you that he was….that he was proud to be called your brother."

Sesshomaru eyes widened by an almost unnoticeable fraction of an inch, a bucket of ice water downed into his stomach and a strange tightness clutched at his chest.

Miroku went on determinedly, "There was no fear in his eyes…there was no anger or hatred….only pain and…and happiness…he died with a clean conscious surrounded by his family…except you. You failed him, Sesshomaru…but Inuyasha forgave you and I could see the little boy in his eyes also…the one who still looked up to you and…and loved you. So tell me…what do you think of your worthless half brother now?"

Again Sesshomaru didn't answer and only kept staring at his little brother's grave. Miroku nodded to himself and then he looked up at the night sky. _I have done what you asked Inuyasha…I pray…I hope that you are satisfied…_His staff tinkling with its mournful tune, the monk walked away into the dark forest, leaving Sesshomaru all by himself with his thoughts.

_

* * *

Dammit Miroku! Where are you? Inuyasha's little lungs were burning and heaving as he dodged each tree, sniffing the air. __The villagers said that they saw you go in here but where are you now? Dammit! You better not be getting yourself killed!_Inuyasha's little lungs were burning and heaving as he dodged each tree, sniffing the air. 

The hanyou knew of the dangers that hid themselves in the depths of his forest, the demons, though not large could still cause some harm to an unsuspecting human. And let's not forget bears or wolves.

_Maybe…he's at the Goshinboku tree…_Inuyasha panted and changed directions. _I'm too small for this. _

Yasha slowed to a halt as he neared his grave, gloomy and desolate in the moon's shine. _This is where they buried me…my body is under there…_It was a strange concept to look at your own grave, no to watch your very own funeral, it made everything feel all topsy turvy and you forget that _you_ are the one they're mourning about. _What will happen to that body when my new one comes…it is just ashes now but……will I destroy this grave once I come back?_

The pup's little paws crunched and slicked off the dew grass as he neared his 'final resting spot'. _Wait…what is…? _Inuyasha's eyes widened and he frantically began sniffing the grass and the air, twirling around in circles and zig zags.

The forest did a good job covering it up but Inuyasha couldn't miss it.

He couldn't deny it either, his nose was always right.

His older brother had been at his grave not to long ago.

_Sesshomaru…why would you come to my grave? _But Yasha would have to ponder about that later as he caught a whiff of Miroku scent following out deeper to the forest. _Aug, Dammit!_

He bounded into the darkness.

The scent got stronger and stronger as he followed some peculiar jingling and slamming sounds. Inuyasha knew the jangling sound to be of Miroku's staff but it sounded like…like there was a struggle going on. _Maybe he's using his staff to fight a demon!_

With a protective adrenaline boost he ran with all his might to the sounds of battle…but when he tumbled to a stop in the safety of a concealing bush he saw that Miroku was actually…all alone.

Inuyasha was stunned as he watched the monk grit his teeth and attack a tree's trunk with his metal staff. Wood splinters flying around him and dents marring his precious monk belonging. There was sweat cascading down his face and he was grunting and roaring with choked screams of rage.

Inuyasha had never seen the usually calm and serene monk so angry.

The hanyou's ears twitched as Miroku began to yell something as he hit the tree, "Damn, Sesshomaru! Damn that bastard Naraku! Damn everything! Why did everyone make his life such a living hell! Why…WHY? _WHY DID HE HAVE TO DIE?"_

Yasha's eyes widened more as Miroku threw his staff to the ground and began _punching _the tree. The puppy winced as he heard the crack of the monk's hands.

"_He didn't have to die!" _punch, "_He wasn't meant to die!" _Punch.

"He…

Punch

….should not…

Punch

…_have died!"_

Punch, punch, punch.

The tree suffered no damage except of the staining red of the monk's blood. It was reeking in Inuyasha's nose, making him dizzy. Why was Miroku doing this? What had made him so angry?

Even though his hands were bruised and broken, the monk didn't stop his self mutilation and torture, still punching the tree with all his might. Not noticing the pain at all.

"He shouldn't have died! Dammit, he's the most important one in our group! He has to defeat Naraku, he has to be here for Shippo and…and Kagome! I…I should have taken…his place," overcome with exhaustion, Miroku slumped to his knees, his head resting against the bloody trunk.

"I'm already going to die, I was destined to die by this curse," Miroku twitched his broken, bloody, bruised, and cursed hand, "He should not have suffered all that pain…..I should have jumped in front of that blast….not Inuyasha…He didn't deserve that pain…what did he do?"

Yasha then decided to make himself known and walked out of the bushes, making little noises in the back of his throat. Miroku opened his eyes groggily and looked at the snow white pup.

_Dammit, Miroku, you look like hell. Haven't you been sleeping at all? Or eating? _Why was it that when humans were grieving, they don't sleep or eat? Kagome had done it as well. _But don't you remember when momma died? You didn't even feel like living…_

Yes, he remembered that pain, it was horrible even with his demon blood. So was it worse for humans?

_**Make the pain go away….make him cry away the sorrow…make him laugh…make him want to keep living…**_

Inuyasha crawled on his stomach and licked Miroku's broken hand, blood stinging the sensitive buds on his tongue. He licked away the thick flowing liquid gently to not jar his snapped fingers. He let his instincts take over and took the pain away.

He stared up at the monk's hollow violet eyes, glassy and hazy; he didn't even look like he saw the hanyou. Standing up on his lap, Inuyasha placed his two front paws on Miroku's chest and licked his face but that didn't even make him blink.

_Miroku…talk to me, say something…or just move dammit! _Inuyasha began to grow irritated and growled but that didn't even rise a reaction to the man. Not taking any more of this, the pup finally nipped at Miroku's ear making the monk jump in sharp pain.

"Ow, Yasha that hurt…" he rubbed his offended ear delicately and then grimaced by the at last noticed pain in his hands. He lifted them in front of him and stared at them with uncaring eyes, like it was merely interesting to find that nearly every one of his fingers were broken.

He sighed and stood up, knocking Yasha to the ground in a huff. The man didn't seem to take notice of the dog's growl and bent down, picking up his golden staff.

Without even saying a word or blinking an eye, he gripped one of the sharp dangling rings and pulled it down his arm dreadfully slow, a rivulet of crimson blood trickling down his skin.

_Holy shit, what the hell are you doing! _Inuyasha barked frantically and ran to Miroku, who only dodged out of the way and continued with another long gash. Inuyasha twisted quickly and was able to sink his teeth into Miroku's ankle, making him yelp and drop his weapon. _Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it, why are you doing this?_

"Get off of me, damn it! Don't you try to stop me! This pain is nothing compared to what Inuyasha went through!" He grabbed the scruff of Yasha's neck and tossed him unceremoniously to the side. "Leave me alone! I'm not needed! Let me finish! I should have died a long time ago, not Inuyasha! I should have saved him! I should have jumped in front of Naraku's damn blast!" He leaned down to grab his staff, his suicidal weapon of choice.

_NO! Dammit, no I won't let you do this! _Inuyasha snarled and ran, slamming into the monk's side, sending him to the ground. Miroku grunted in anger and tried to get back up but Yasha pounced on his stomach, effectively knocking the air out of him.

As he panted and stared wide eyed up at the night sky, Inuyasha laid on his chest and also tried to catch his breath and calm his nerves. The hanyou jolted as Miroku's chest began to jerk. He looked up at the man's face, salt stinging his nose, and sure enough tears were leaking out of the monk's violet eyes.

Miroku was crying.

The monk was actually crying…and it surprised the hanyou. Miroku was always the calm one, never screaming in anger or giving in to hysterics.

_Until now. _

Apparently the monk was a little surprised too as he groaned angrily and rubbed at his eyes with the back of his hand. But that didn't stop the grieving flow. He muttered something under his breath and rubbed harder.

Inuyasha leaned up and softly yanked Miroku's wrist away with his jaws, being careful not to puncture the delicate skin. _You're going to rub your eyes out. _Yasha gently wrapped his paws around the monk's arm and placed it under his chest. _I'm not going to let you hurt yourself, anymore…you baka. _

Miroku blinked dazedly, more tears trailing hot fiery trails down his cheeks. "Let…let go of my arm…Yasha…" His voice was weak and laced with exhaustion, hitching slightly by controlled sobs.

Inuyasha shook his head defiantly.

Miroku groaned and Yasha could feel his arm and shoulders relax as he laid back down on the grass, closing his eyes, no longer giving any mind to the tears.

The hanyou pup gripped his arm securely and rested his chin down on top of it, licking gently at his fingers.

"Yasha…go home….leave me alone…okay?" Inuyasha growled in response and continued soothing away the now clotting blood. "You don't need to be here…go away…" Yasha glared at him and made no movement. Miroku glared back, "I said _go away!_" He began to sit up, Inuyasha falling to his lap.

_No, I won't leave. I knew you would be the hardest but you know I'm damn stubborn and I like a challenge. So I won't go until my job is done. _He growled and sat insolently on the monk's crossed legs, glaring at him with bright amber orbs. _Just try to stop me, I won't leave you alone. _

Miroku kept up the glaring contest for a little longer but finally sighed dejectedly, "What the hell am I doing? I'm arguing with a dog." He rubbed his forehead and grimaced.

_Hello, monk, your hands are broken…_Inuyasha sighed himself and nosed both of Miroku's hands to lie on his knees. Yasha looked up at his bowed head and a single tear fell on his nose.

Miroku's violet blue eyes were hidden by lowered lashes and his voice was rugged and cracked, "I told myself that I wouldn't cry…actually I did a good job for the past week…I don't know why it's starting now……"

Inuyasha twisted his head to see him. _The pain got too hard to bear…you should have expected it…you humans are so weak._

"I need to be strong though…I'm the only man left…..this is no time to start…." Miroku glared but before he could wipe his face with his wrecked hands, Inuyasha growled and shook his head.

"Yasha, you damn dog…get off!" His only response was another growl and the pup even bared his fangs as Miroku tried to move his arms. "Yasha…" he whispered threateningly but Inuyasha only snuffed and tilted his nose up in a 'make me' pose. Miroku contemplated on shaking the infuriating mutt but finally sighed, "Fine, you win. You can stay." Inuyasha gave a doggy grin and twisted into a circle before making himself comfortable on Miroku's lap, scratching his ear lazily and with a hint of self pride.

"By the Great Spirit above you are annoying…and so damn arrogant." Miroku shook his head as he was answered by innocent amber eyes. "It's almost like you can understand me and you look so much like him…must be why everyone's so taken with you, eh?'

Yasha nodded and grinned again.

Miroku actually chuckled but the slight tilt of his mouth quickly fell, "But you aren't…it's foolish to try to replace him with a mutt like you…"

Inuyasha growled. _Hey!_

"Sorry…but it's true…Inuyasha isn't coming back and they should all accept that…….I should accept that," He glanced at his red streaked arm. "I don't know what came over me….it felt like the only way to get rid of all the pain and the guilt would be to kill myself….I've seen many horrible and sad things in my life but I'm amazed this got me so hard." More tears and Miroku hung his head, "But he was my friend…a part of the family…our family……it's amazing I guess….how we could all care so much for a demon…..but I don't think it is...he was a hanyou but he still had feelings….he still had a soul."

Miroku looked up at the sky, the shine of the moon and the bright stars making his drifting tears to glitter and glisten. "Do you think….he's up in heaven, Yasha?"

Yasha made no move of an answer, staring at Miroku with a widened and intent gaze.

"I like to think so….I like to think that demons are allowed to go to heaven…that anybody could go to heaven no matter what you are……I like that thought," he looked down and there was a small smile gracing his lips, "I like that thought very much."

Yasha nodded and stretched slightly. _I like that thought too._

"It still hurts you know…." Miroku's smile had fallen and there was a deep hurt in his unveiled eyes, "It hurts a lot…but it's supposed to be isn't it? My pain is probably nothing…compared to the to the physical pain…of any of the pain Inuyasha had to endure. I wish he never had to go through that, I wish he was still here…and that I had taken his place."

Inuyasha jumped up and licked his chin. _Don't say that, baka, it's too late now okay? And besides everyone needs you…dammit Sango needs you…stop talking like this, stop acting like this! _He jumped again by a small sound.

"Mi-Miroku, you can't mean that?" Miroku and Inuyasha turned to a grave looking Sango, fresh tears just now leaking out of her pained eyes. She was dressed in her everyday outfit but her boomerang was leaning against her shoulder.

"Sango," Miroku whispered softly, filled with pain and sorrow. "What are you doing here?"

She took a step forward, dropping her weapon, "You and Yasha had been missing for some time now, even missed dinner. I came to find you. Miroku…are you alright?" She gasped and ran to his side, "Oh my god, you're bleeding!"

Yasha hopped off of Miroku's lap and huffed in relief, Sango was here, she could handle the monk.

"Miroku, your hands…and your arm…what happened to you?" she gently traced a finger alongside his painful looking gash.

"It's nothing, Sango, go back to the village. I'll be fine…I…I just want to be left alone." She looked up and noticed his tear streaked face.

"No, Miroku, I'm not going any where. I…I think you have been left alone quite enough." Sango pulled out a handkerchief from her many pockets hidden in her clothes and grabbed one of his hands. She fingered the bruises and dried blood mournfully before wrapping it with the soft cloth. "You…you did this to yourself, didn't you?"

Miroku didn't answer.

"I know it's been difficult…but you can't hurt yourself…to…to make the pain go away…because it won't….not like that," after bandaging his other hand, Sango kneeled down to her knees in front of him and cupped Miroku's face, stroking the dried salt with her thumb. "I'm…I'm so sorry I haven't been there for you, Miroku….I was so engrossed in my own pain that I didn't notice until it was to late,' she glanced at his broken hands.

"Sango…please don't blame yourself…I can't take anymore guilt….it's not your fault." She sniffed and looked back into his pained eyes.

"Miroku……it's not your fault either you know…..you couldn't have done anything to stop….Inuyasha's death…..even if you could….it's to late now…it's to late…" She kissed his forehead and wrapped her arms around him, placing his face into her shoulder. "I understand what you're going through…….I wanted to do something too….I wanted to take Inuyasha's place too….I wished that I had died instead of him…'

Miroku gasped and reeled up to see her face, "Don't say that! I could never…I could never want you to die…don't say that…."

Sango smiled, "That's how I feel too, Miroku….I need you and I don't want you die either…I don't want to see you in so much pain……I want to make it go away….I'm sorry it took me so long……oh, Miroku," she hugged him again and Miroku gave it back, burying his face into the cloth of her kimono. She tugged her fingers through his hair, releasing it from its band, and stroking his black silky locks. "Oh Miroku…"

"I love you, Sango…" she gasped, her eyes wide, by the monk's muffled exclamation. He hugged her tighter, "I'm so sorry for everything I've done to you but I love you….oh, God, I've loved you for so long….dammit Sango….I need you so much….especially right now…" she could feel the moisture of his pain dampen her clothes.

"Shhhh, Miroku….it's okay….it'll be okay….I Love you too… longer than I can I remember…I love you and I'm right here….I'll take care of you….I need you…it'll be okay….I'm right here…I'll make it all better…..shhhhh…." she stroked his back and kept whispering in his ear until the shaking ceased and then they were merely holding one another.

Inuyasha nodded his head in satisfaction. _About time, good job you guys. I hope you'll be happy together. _

Smiling his doggy smile he turned and began walking back to the village, leaving the couple alone, and heading to his own love.

**A.N I made this super long and I would have made it longer but you guys have waited long enough and what I was planning on writing may get too long. It'll be in the next chappie. Now, review and tell me if I portrayed Sessho's character right. He is so super hard and I want to know how you guys felt I did. Oh, and sorry about making Miroku sucidal, that is way OOC but hey, his friends died, that can really mess you up. **


	7. A new light

**A.N Prepare for a little OOC so don't get mad at me in your reviews because I warned ya. Now enjoy ch 7, it's all about Sessho. **

**Always There**

**Ch 7**

She knew there was something wrong.

She knew the very moment he walked into the cave with a deathly cold air. He was always quiet and cold but this time it seemed even more so. And though his eyes would be viewed as emotionless and stone hard, Rin could see the chaos within him.

Sesshomaru-sama was in pain.

He had neglected the food given to him and had only growled as Jakken asked him where he had been in his high nasally annoying voice. That had shut the toad up quite effectively. Giving no reason or even saying a single word really, the dog demon left the cave after just arriving and sat down next to the many trees surrounding their temporary home.

Rin stared worriedly as he looked up at the sky with a melancholy aura around him.

Jakken couldn't see it, but Rin was a pro at seeing the arctic demon's inner feelings and she knew that her precious Fluffy-sama was in incredible pain.

Standing up, ignoring Jakken's protests to leave him alone, walked out of the cave as well; shivering slightly from the chill and freezing dew numbing her feet, Rin headed towards her Sessho-sama.

The dog demon didn't even glance at her, he knew she was there as she sat down next to him but he was so engrossed in his thoughts that he didn't care to acknowledge her.

The monk's words were still ringing in his ears, again and again in his head.

"_Inuyasha died by the wounds he received by saving us, **by protecting his pack!"**_

"_Do you respect him, Sesshomaru?"_

"_Do you respect that…**hanyou?"**_

"_You should have been there……**you** failed **him**…"_

"_He was proud to be called your brother."_

"_Inuyasha forgave you……still looked up to you…and loved you…"_

"_What do you think of your worthless half brother now?"_

_Proud to be called my brother…_

"**_Yay, Nii-san's here!"_**

_Still looked up to me…loved me…love…_

"**_You're the best brother in the whole world. I love you, Nii-san."_**

_I failed him……_

"**_You're the best, Nii-san!"_**

Sesshomaru cocked his head a fraction to the side as old memories flashed in his head. Loving, happy memories that he had made himself forget so long ago.

_It was before the hatred, it was before the curse of a chilling cold that still resided in him, it was when he was young, innocent, and impressionable. Where it didn't matter if he showed his anger or sadness, though he tried his best to conceal them; young Sesshomaru didn't want his father to know how the act of remarrying was hurting him._

_His parents were supposedly superb mates and he had thought everything was wonderful. He had thought that really his momma only died from a sickness or wound, which was horribly painful in itself but it was actually the talk he heard muttered around the castle that had gotten the poor pup. He didn't understand what it meant to 'cheat' and he didn't know what they were talking about when they said the 'paramour' was angry on finding out his mother had a mate and had…sought revenge. _

He did now. Sesshomaru gave a small unnoticeable sigh. His mother had had an affair and the lowly demon she was with had found out she was married and had murdered her to seek vengeance on being lead on. He had set out to kill the demon later on his life but had come to find the bitter news that the bastard was killed by some worthless demon exterminators. The feeling of betrayal and disbelief, anger and hatred had raged quietly in the dog demon for so long. It was one of the reasons he was who he was today.

It was one of the reasons the cold came to exist inside of him.

_Little Sesshomaru was confused, hurt, angry, sad and there were dozens of other emotions that rallied the poor boy as only a few months later, his father announced he was already wedded. There was no hatred of humans inside of him at that time, only a bitter hatred of the new **mommy** about to be suddenly dropped onto him. He had loved his mother, _lord knows he still does, _and the quick change of mates by his father had stung him. He thought his father had loved his mother as well. _

"Guess not," _he muttered as he lounged in his secret hiding spot at the base of the many stairs hidden in the large castle. _"He doesn't care about momma…and he doesn't care about me." _The little boy sniffed and buried his face in the nest of his tiny crossed arms. _

_He had missed the welcome of the new Lady and had even missed dinner as well; his stomach growled in anger at that fact. But he did not budge and he wondered if he had fallen asleep as **she** came along and had found him. _

_She smelled of lilacs and jasmine plus that distasteful **human** smell as she looked down underneath the steps to see him huddled in a sad little ball. **"**_Hello there little one, you must be Sesshomaru. Correct?"

_He glared at her untrustingly and nodded. This was the woman his father had now married and mated. This was to be his new **mother**. His glare grew harder._

"May I join you? It seems really nice under here," _she sat down before she had gotten an answer and he growled, backing away._

"Go away, I don't want you here!" _His eyes briefly flashed red and he bared his fangs._

"Why not?" _She seemed unperturbed by the boy's menace and looked at him curiously._

"Because you took my momma's place, I want my old momma, not you! _His eyes blurred with tears and he contemplated on running out of there. _

_The woman's beautiful face grew sad, _"I understand, this must be so hard and painful for you. I tried to tell your father to wait...," _she ruffled her bangs in frustration and threw her hands up in to the air, "_but your father can be such a…a **baka**, sometimes."

_Sesshomaru's big amber eyes grew wide, _"You…you called papa a name." _Nobody, not even a demon, would even **think** on calling the king a name. But here was this human calling his father a baka._

"Well it's true don't you think?" _She smiled and laughed, "_He can be a real **big baka **sometimes! I swear." _She succumbed to a brilliant burst of laughter. _

_Sesshomaru couldn't help the small grin that lit his face. He had to agree, his father had been real inconsiderate to how he felt to all these changes, your mother dying and being gossiped about and then another momma coming along. It was too much in such a short time…yeah, his father could be a **big baka!** He giggled despite himself. _

"There you go; you see I'm not the only one who thinks so! Even his son does, oh your father is so full of himself!" _She sighed and shook her head._

_A trickle of fear and apprehension eased into Sesshomaru's insides, _"You…You won't tell him will you? Papa…Papa will get **really** mad at me if he found out….he would be really mad at you too." _He whispered the last part and he had drawn his knees up to his chest, wrapping his arms around them. _

"Don't fret, little one, I won't tell anyone. It'll be our little secret and besides even if he did find out, he should know that we both love him very much. Love can overcome anger easily."

_Sesshomaru was instantly relieved and was…was beginning to like this lady. **But she's your new momma now, she took your other momma's place, you shouldn't like her! **_

"You…you love my Papa?"_ He asked timidly. _

"Of course I do, no matter what a big lug he can be…but I bet I don't love him as much as you, huh?" _She questioned teasily, he shyly shook his head. _"But…maybe I do? Hmmm, maybe I love him more…."

_Sesshomaru had taken the bait, _"Naha, I love him more!"

"No way, I do."

"No, I do."

"Well, I guess you're going to have to show me. You see I love your father this much," _she put up her hands and moved them apart about a foot and a half. _"Can you beat that?"

"Uh huh, easy, I love him thhhhiiiiisssss much," _he stretched his arms out as wide as he could get them. _

_She chuckled and pouted jokingly, _"Ahhh, you beat me. That's not fair."

_He smiled and sat back down, _"Of course I can. You're only a human. I'm a demon." _He pointed to his chest proudly. _

"Well big…tough," _she poked his side and he squirmed with a giggle, _"grown up demon boy. I may be human but I still bet I could beat you in other stuff."

"Oh, yeah, like what?"

"Like…beating you to the kitchen," _She jumped up and started to jog down the hall. _

"No way, I'm faster!" _And he proved it too as he skimmed past her. _

Sesshomaru blinked away the first memory of his new step mother. She had easily gotten him to eat dinner and had succeeded on becoming part of the family. He could never replace his mother with her, but he knew that he had once felt affections for the human woman. He had accepted her and life had slowly edged back to normal.

That is until she became pregnant.

_Sesshomaru and his father paced anxiously in the master bedroom as screams of pain and…perhaps anger…were heard in the additional room where Izayaoi was being treated by the castle nurse. _

"Papa, is she okay? She sounds hurt and," _he sniffed and he gasped worriedly, _"I smell blood, Papa! She is hurt!"

_His father groaned and continued pacing, _"I'm sure she's fine, Sessho. I mean, your momma bled too when you were born, it must be normal right? But….Izayaoi is human…and that smells like a lot of blood…" _They both covered their sensitive ears as another scream echoed off the walls. _

"AUGH, DAMMIT, I WILL GET YOU FOR THIS _DEAR!_ I'LL MAKE YOU WISH THAT YOU…ARRRRHHHH!" _Her threat was cut off and Sesshomaru could hear the happy exclamation of the nurse and the small cry of a baby. _

_Father and son looked at one another in shock and amazement._

_A bubbling lady kitsune popped her head out of the connecting door, "_Oh, your highness! Congratulations! It's a boy! It's a boy!"

_His father broke into a smile and heaved Sesshomaru into the air and hugged him tightly, ruffling his hair. _"Do you hear that, Sessho! It's a boy, it's a boy! You have a new baby brother!"

_Sesshomaru smiled and laughed after the initial shock wore off, _"I have a baby brother! I have a baby brother!"

_They both laughed joyously as they ran into the room, not even listening to the protests of the nurses. _

_Izayaoi also paid no heed as she laid on the over sized mattress looking exhausted but glowing in happiness, holding a small bundle in her arms. _"Hello you two," _she whispered tiredly, Sesshomaru's father sat down on the edge of the bed and kissed her forehead. _

"How are you feeling?"

_She smirked, _"How should I be feeling after going through something like _that!" She cocked an eyebrow at him. _

_He frowned worriedly, _"Oh, dear, I'm sorry, are you hurt, are you in pain! It's all my fault isn't it, I—"

_He was cut off by a peck on the cheek, "_I'm fine dear, and extremely happy also." _She kissed him full on the mouth, Sesshomaru grimaced._

"Ewwww, not when I'm in the room, please! I'm only a pup!" _He stuck out his tongue and covered his eyes, his parents giggled. _

"Yes, but you're growing up fast and now you have a new responsibility, being an older brother," _Izayaoi smiled and leaned on his father's shoulder._

"Res..spons…eewhat? That sounds hard," _he didn't like that idea._

"It can be but the rewards make it all worthwhile. You see your new responsibility is to protect, and play with your new younger brother."

"You need to make sure he doesn't get into any trouble," _his father added._

"And of course love him. He'll look up to you, Sessho, you'll be his special Nii-san."

"A brother's bond is very powerful, Sesshomaru. Treasure it," _his father smiled and beckoned him to come to them, "_Now come see your new little brother."

_Sesshomaru felt big and powerful as he held his sleeping brother in his arms, strange little ears lightly twitching atop his white haired head. Inuyasha seemed so small and helpless, the dog demon felt a strange wave of protectiveness for his new younger brother. _"Hello, little Yasha, I'm your Nii-san…" _he said in a soft whisper. _

_Inuyasha's answer was a little smile and a sigh as he snuggled into Sesshomaru's chest. _

"My new little brother…" **_I'll protect you…_**

Sesshomaru scowled. What was wrong with him? Why were these long lost memories suddenly surfacing? Why was he feeling these pathetic stupid human emotions as he relived one and another? Why couldn't he stop them? Why…why didn't he want to?

**_Oh, shit where is he? Where is he, where is he, where is he? _**"INUYASHA! Little Yasha where are you?" _A slightly older Sesshomaru ran around the castle halls, panic starting to seize in. It all started as a simple game of hide and seek but who knew his three year old little brother was so good at it!_

"Why did I teach him how to hide your scent? Why did I teach him where all the good hiding spots are," _Sesshomaru groaned and ran faster, his father wouldn't be pleased to know his younger of the two sons was MISSING. _"Okay, so if I was Inu, where would I…" _A giggle reached his ears. _

_Sesshomaru smirked. At least he hadn't taught him yet how to keep quiet. The dog demon straightened and closed his eyes, sniffing delicately and straining his ears. A tiny heart beat and another muffled giggle sounded from the side of him. **Aha!**_

_He pounced behind a window curtain and grabbed the little boy hiding behind it. Little Inuyasha shrieked and laughed as they tumbled on the carpet. _

"Ah, Nii-san, you found me! Yay! Can we do it again, please, please, please?" _Inuyasha jumped up and down Sesshomaru's chest. His big amber eyes were bright with amusement and brotherly pride. _"I want to hide again and see if Nii-san can find me! Nii-san is so good at this game!"

_Sesshomaru chuckled and pushed to a sitting position, ruffling Inuyasha's already long snow white hair. The younger pup sat on his lap and stared up at him with a huge gapped smile. _"Maybe later, Yasha. Its dinner time right now and then bed."

"Ahhhh," _Inuyasha huffed and crossed his arms but he immediately brightened. _"Okay, but can Nii-san read me a story tonight! Please!"

"Why not your mom?"

_Inuyasha shook his head, "_No, Nii-san does it better! I want Nii-san to do it." _He gave his cute little puppy pout and it of course got the older brother. _

"Okay, fine but only one."

_Inuyasha's face glowed in happiness as he hugged Sesshomaru around the neck. "_You're the best, Nii-San!"

He remembered that feeling. When little Inuyasha would say he was the best. What was that called? He hadn't felt it for so long. It was gentle and warm, totally the opposite of what he was now. He remembered the glowing pride in Inuyasha's huge golden eyes as he looked up at him. That had made him feel another warm feeling. _Stupid human emotions…they're not important…_

But no matter what he thought or how hard he tried. Sesshomaru couldn't make them go away and the memories wouldn't leave him alone.

Someone was having a lot of fun messing him up.

_Sesshomaru jumped from his bed as a scream and crying roared in his ears. So full of pain and fear…Inuyasha! The dog demon ran from his room, ignoring the chill of the night and the gloomy darkness as he sprinted with all his might to his younger brother's room. _

_He bursted through the door to find a trembling hanyou pup sobbing in his step mother's arms, a cold stone plopped in his stomach. _"What's going on? What's wrong?"

_Inuyasha gasped and looked up, his little face glistening with sweat and his amber eyes rimmed red with salt. _"N—Nii-san!" _He leaped off his bed and ran to Sesshomaru, who knelt down on his knees and opened his arms. Inuyasha buried his face in Sesshomaru's night time clothes and succumbed to more tears. _

_The dog demon looked to Izayaoi for an explanation but she only shrugged her shoulders in exasperated confusion. Sesshomaru wrapped his arms around the shaking pup and cradled him close, rubbing his back soothingly. _"What's wrong, Inu? Was it a bad dream, what was it about?"

"It was awful, Nii-san! I don't know why but you were mad at me…**really mad!** You…you said you hated me and…and that you wanted to…k—kill me!" _Inuyasha snuggled closer and the shocked demon could feel his shirt growing damp. _

"Kill you…hate you…why would I…I don't…Inuyasha, listen to me. I would never hurt you, okay? You're my little brother why would I want to do that?" _Sesshomaru wiped Inuyasha's cheek, who stared up at him with such innocence and want for reassurance. _

"Do you promise, Nii-san? Do you promise to always be my big brother? No matter what?"

"Yes, Inu, no matter what. I can't get rid of you, we're brothers forever." _Sesshomaru smiled but Inuyasha still looked worried._

"Do you promise? Say you promise…pinky swear," _he stuck out his little finger. _

"I pinky swear…I promise we'll always be brothers." _Sesshomaru did the pinky shake and Inuyasha broke out into a grin and hugged him close, as if he would disappear. _

"Can you stay here with me, Nii-san? Can you keep the bad dreams away?"

_Sesshomaru stood up with the pup in his arms and walked to his bed, Izayaoi smiled and nodded, standing up to walk out of the room. _"Sure, Yasha. I'll be right here, I'll always be."

_Inuyasha yawned and settled his head against Sesshomaru's shoulder, closing his eyes. _"You're the best brother in the whole world. I love you, Nii-san." _Sesshomaru smiled and sat down on the soft mattress, leaning his back against the wall. _

"I…I love you too…"

What had gone wrong? Why couldn't he remember how it went so awful and twisted? How could such a loving relationship, even though he didn't like to admit it, turn into the murderous hating relationship of today? Why did these stupid feelings keep making themselves known? Why did he feel….what was it…guilty…shame….regret? Why couldn't he feel…satisfied that his weak little brother was finally killed….why did he instead keep thinking about the times he had had with him? What the hell was wrong with him?

It was jumbled and confused. He did remember blood…lots of death…and talking. Someone was saying that….his parents are dead….his father was killed….it was…it was the hanyou's fault….they killed because of the hanyou….Inuyasha.

Anger, hatred, cold seeping into his stomach.

"Yay, Nii-san is here!" bright amber eyes, still glassy with tears, running to him, arms outstretched.

"Get away from me, I hate you! It's all your fault, you killed him, you destroyed everything! You stupid…stupid _hanyou! _I'll kill you!" red eyes, anger, hatred, kill, kill…but there was sadness…the look on his little brother's face…all his fault…more anger…more cold…

"But…But you promised….you pinky swore…"

"I don't care…I…I lied! I hate you, I wish you were never my brother! You're just my stupid, pathetic…_hanyou half brother!"_

Tears turning to hurt and anger, all that anger pointed to him...his fault…_you_ failed _him..._ "You…you _promised…you promised we would always be brothers! You broke it! I hate you! I HATE YOU!"_

Cold…nothing else mattered anymore…he was alone…_a brother's bond is very important…treasure it…_he broke it….his feelings were killing him, destroying him…the guilt, the hatred…get rid of them…it was his fault…kill him….don't share your feelings…lock them away…kill the hanyou…he's not your brother anymore…_I love you, Nii-san…I HATE YOU! _Kill…cold….

Sesshomaru grimaced and shut his eyes tight. No, they were getting too powerful…like before…get rid of them…like before….he willed himself to relax and build all those damn churning emotions together and pushed them away…there, cold…

But he could still feel one…and it wouldn't go away. It wasn't powerful but it ate at him slowly, trying to grow power. He couldn't let it….why did it feel like his chest was bruised and broken…why did his heart beat so hard and loud…why did his throat hurt….why did he feel lazy and had no urge to ever stand up…ever…what was this called? What did humans call this emotion?

Sesshomaru's eyes widened very slightly. He knew….he knew now…but it couldn't be. He is…was just a hanyou…he's a full demon…he couldn't be feeling….his younger brother…his kin….why? How? But it…was true and the feeling wouldn't go away.

_I'm…grieving…_Sesshomaru's eyelids drooped and he slumped against the tree's trunk. Grieving…a full demon…grieving even slightly for a stupid hanyou, pathetic…_but he was your younger brother…I love you Nii-san…_grieving…

Rin was astonished by the random emotions that flashed in the demon's amber eyes as he looked up at the sky. So many that she couldn't keep track…but now it was just sadness as he relaxed against the tree. A deep hurt, hardly protected against the usual cold. It was like he wasn't even trying to keep it hidden…or he couldn't.

"Sessho-sama….?" She asked in a soft voice.

He blinked…_Rin…I had almost forgotten she was there. _"Rin, shouldn't you be inside? You'll get sick…"

Rin winced by the deep emotionless commanding voice, but she could detect the tightness underlining it. "Rin knows, Sessho-sama but Rin…"

"What Rin? What would you like to say?" Sesshomaru didn't look at her.

The little girl sighed, "Sesshomaru-sama, can Rin sit on your lap?"

He didn't expect that. Sesshomaru blinked and turned to her. Her eyes were big and bright….did all little kids' eyes look alike? He nodded slowly. Rin smiled happily and scuffled onto his outstretched knees, sitting in front of him.

Then she grew serious and curious as she looked into his eyes, he started to feel strangely self-conscious. "What Rin?"

She blinked and cocked her head like a little puppy, "Why are you sad, Sessho-sama? Does something hurt?" Rin frowned concernedly and placed a tiny hand on his chest.

_How did…she know…is it that obvious? _"Can you see it clearly, Rin?"

She nodded but smiled reassuringly, "Yeah, but Rin is the only one who can." Her smile grew proud, "Rin is very good at seeing them."

She looked a bit cocky and Sesshomaru had the weirdest urge to smile. "That's good to know Rin, I'm glad that only you can."

She giggled and blushed cutely but then grew serious and worried once again, "Will Sessho-sama tell Rin what is wrong? Rin will keep it a secret, if Sessho-sama wants me too."

A secret, she would keep it a secret? Sesshomaru was curious as to why he suddenly wanted to spill everything, all the pain, guilt, and regret…all on the shoulders of a small little girl. He couldn't do that…that would be so wrong and cruel. "Thank you, Rin. But no, I am fine."

"No you're not, Sessho-sama. You're hurt and sad. It is making Rin sad too. Please will Sessho-sama tell Rin? Rin wants to make it all better. Rin wants to make Sessho-sama happy again." She laid her head on his chest and gave him a short loving hug. "Rin doesn't like to see Sessho-sama so sad."

_I make her sad…she wants to make it all better…_"I don't think you can make it go away, Rin."

She looked up at him in eagerness, "Rin knows, but Rin has felt sad too. Talking helps, it makes it not so big."

He really did want to talk…he wanted someone to listen and to care. But why to a human, why to Rin, why didn't he feel like she was the only one he wanted to? "Will you keep it a secret, Rin? Do you…promise?"

She bobbed her head enthusiastically, "Oh, yes, Rin pinky swears." Sesshomaru's chest tightened as she put out her cute little finger. _Pinky swear…_his finger looked so big and dangerous looking as they shook. Rin laughed and sat straight and attentive. "Okay, Rin's ready."

Sesshomaru tilted his head and a small twist turned his mouth….but it quickly fell. "Someone…I know….has died, Rin."

She gasped and her little hands covered her mouth in shock and dismay, "Oh, no…Rin is so sorry." Tears filled her beautiful eyes; Sesshomaru felt a trickle of panic.

"Why…why are you crying, Rin?" he felt…bad about making her cry…

She sniffed, "It's so sad….was the person very important to you, Sessho-sama?"

_Important to me…would he be…_ "You're the best, Nii-san!" Sesshomaru sighed. "I think so, Rin…but I am not sure…"

"Who is it….can Rin ask who died?" her voice was tiny, like if she raised it any higher he would break.

He thought about it, did he really want her to know? If she did…could the feeling go away? Would she care, should he? What was with all these questions?

"He was…my younger brother…" his voice was low and quiet. He did not want anyone…besides her to know.

She gasped again, heartfelt and sad, as more tears fell down her rosy cheeks. "Oh, Sessho-sama! I'm so sorry!" She lunged at him and hugged him tight. "Oh, poor Sessho-sama, poor Fluffy…I'll make it all better…" She stood on his legs and wrapped her arms around his neck, nuzzling him lovingly.

He was stunned. Salt stained his clothes, his shoulder began to grow damp, his nose stinging and his throat began to grow tight. He didn't expect her to care…this much. Why did his chest feel warm…it almost felt like that one time….Inuyasha….Rin...

"Fluffy-sama….does it hurt?" she looked up at him with glistening brown eyes and put a fist atop his heart, "does this hurt?"

His throat felt dry and scratchy so he just nodded very slowly. Rin's lip trembled and she kissed his cheek, "Oh, Fluffy. Rin knows how that feels…it hurt there for Rin too when Rin's family died. Poor Fluffy…my poor Fluffy-sama…"

_It hurt there for her too…of course her family died…she has no one….no one was there…I never asked her, comforted her…_ "Does…does it still hurt, Rin?" _I failed her too…_

But Rin shook her head and smiled dazzling up at him with warm eyes. "No, not anymore, Rin doesn't hurt there anymore. Rin still misses her family…but it doesn't hurt anymore…"

"How…did it go away…?"

"Rin found Sessho and Jakken –sama. Rin found a new family….and Rin became happy again."

Why did his chest and throat hurt so badly? Why was he hanging onto every one of her words like a stupid little pup? Why did he want to hold her?

"We…I made it go away, Rin?" Why did he want to be reassured?

She nodded and kissed him gently on the cheek once more, "Yes…and Rin will make Sessho's pain go away too. Rin will make Sessho happy again."

She laid her head on his shoulder and kept hugging him. Her gentle scent of spring flowers filled his chest and the tightness slowly eased. _Rin…_the hurt was still there, the cold was still there….but it wasn't so bad anymore. She was melting it away.

Timidly he raised his own arm….and wrapped it around her tiny form. He squeezed her gently to his chest and buried his forehead on her shoulder.

_Oh, Rin……_

Amber eyes flashed in his head.

_I'm…sorry…little brother_

The night air was cold but the two didn't feel it. So wrapped in each other's warmth and…love. An unlikely pair but love knows no difference in skin color or race. Love can overcome anger, love can overcome pain, and love could melt anyone's heart. No matter how cold.

**A.N Guess what, that made me teary eyed too. :sniff: I hope you didn't mind the little OOCness but like I said death….and love can really mess you up. Oh, and I haven't seen the Inuyasha movie with Inu's parents and all those flash backs, I made up. So don't be mad and say I got this wrong blah blah…'cause I don't care. Ah, God I love Rin, she's so Kawaii. **


	8. Remembrance and Reality Check!

**A.N Hey, I have a question….do you all want me to make Sesshomaru cry? I…can but I didn't think I should because I wanted him in character….it's just I have this one reviewer (you should know who you are) that has sent me like 4 reviews to make him cry. Hmm……….no sorry….maybe like a tear or a smile but I'm not going to make him bawl……too weird. Okay next chappie. **

**Always There**

**Ch. 8**

_Kagome……I love you……smile for me……I've always loved your smile……so beautiful……you're so good at helping people……so important to me………live a long, happy life………you…made my life worth living………I could never love…someone else……try to be happy……don't wallow too much in your pain, move on, and enjoy life as much as you can together…don't waste it………I…love you guys………I've never felt so accepted………You've all made me so happy…I'm so glad that I met all of you……Thank you…for not letting me die alone……thank you…for being the best family I got………I want to die just like this, thank you……For everything…I love you…I promise…I'll find a way…to always…be with…you……………_

_I love you…_

It was already beginning to fade away. It was becoming harder and harder to remember all that he had said, all the emotions that had flashed in his eyes, the feel of his lips against her cheek, the inner glow of his very soul…it was dulling.

No, she didn't want…to forget…

She didn't want to even forget the very pain of hearing his ragged breathing against her ear or the stinky slip of his life's blood staining her legs and arms. She didn't want to forget his voice, gruff and indifferent, calling her wench, saying he loved her. She didn't want to forget the feel of his little ears, twitching against her fingers, laying flat and dead against her palm. She didn't want to forget the beat of his heart, strong and powerful, getting slower…and slower…until it had finally……

Kagome whimpered and gripped her fingers into fists until they were stark white, forgetting to breathe as she tried to push back at the sobs striking at her chest. No, she didn't want to forget, but she didn't want to cry.

No more, she didn't want to cry anymore.

All the tears were meant for the funeral and that was over with. It was all over with, no more tears.

He was gone, dead; _try to happy, don't wallow too much in your pain. _Kagome squeezed her eyes painfully shut, making her forehead pound by the stress. No, she was not going to cry.

And she was not going to forget.

Once she had gotten hold of her composure, Kagome relaxed her fingers and swallowed several times to get back at that stupid everlasting lump.

She sighed and breathed in the day's brisk air, relieving slightly the thoughts and churning memories, the God-awful emotions, but at least she knew she could still feel.

At least she knew that she had not yet been consumed by the dark empty hole inside of her, slowly sucking her into a deep choking place where she would have to stay forever.

At least she knew she was still alive.

Kagome opened her eyes and looked around her increasingly bright surroundings. Everything was too colorful, too happy with the billowing grass beneath her feet, swaying gently in the wind, the euphoric watercolor lilies and field daisies decorating against the green, the huge yellow sun casting an angelic glow upon every petal and stem.

Spring was supposed to be joyful and wonderful but in her new present outlook of life, Kagome wished it to be a forever winter, dark and cold, like what was currently living inside of her.

She wished that she wasn't here in the first place.

Why in the hell did they have to go today? Why in the burning twisting depths of hell couldn't they stay in the village….or at least let her stay and mellow in the long drudging and lonely years ahead without her beloved soul mate?

Kagome sighed, she knew the answer.

They had a duty…and a promise.

They had to start their journey again sometime, better now than never. They couldn't just let Naraku rally around killing everyone in a joyful frenzy by finally destroying his greatest foe. There was no way she would allow for that evil bastard to breathe for another day. So, Kagome stood taller and set herself in a determined pace to catch up with her traveling companions Yasha at her heels, their journey started once again.

Without their stubborn leader…without her love and best friend, Kagome bit her lip, no more tears for heaven's merciful sake.

No more tears.

Kagome slowed down when she came a couple feet behind her dear friends, her 'pack'. She smiled a very tiny smile, it seemed that Miroku and Sango had finally bridged the gap, though she wondered briefly why Miroku's hands were bandaged. Oh well, it wasn't her place to ask and besides…..did she truly care?

Kagome struggled to lift her bow over shoulder without dropping her precious sword, Inuyasha's precious Tetsusaiga. They tried to dissuade her from taking it; _Kaede could look after it_ they had said.

To that she had answered _no way in hell! _

She trusted Kaede, of course she did, but Kagome just had this sinking feeling at the thought of leaving the trusted weapon behind.

Either in a bizarre way she had subconsciously thought they would need it (which was impossible since the only person who _could_ _wield it_…….was dead) or it was only a pleasant keepsake of who had left them; a way for him to somehow always be there, like he had tried to promise.

Didn't matter what reason really, it was there now and Kagome would protect it with her very life. If she ended up dying in the process, well…she wouldn't mind.

Kagome cradled it in her arms, casually stroking a thumb over the trusted hilt. This sword had protected her many a time, it was her love's most valuable possession, and she would be sure that it lived throughout the ages.

Maybe…it would be better to take it back to the shrine?

It would be safer, no demons in her time and there was already plenty of old stuff in her home, besides she knew that her family would love having a part of Inuyasha in the house.

But…Kagome shuddered at the thought of returning home…she had been reluctant to ever since the fateful trip she had made to inform them of Inuyasha's death.

She wasn't able to take all the tears and broken spirits, Kagome desperately missed the normal loving household, even Buyo seemed depressed by the sudden loss.

And ever since she had explained the true dangers for being in the past, with demons and Naraku to her mother, Kagome had worried that she would not have let her go back.

That was why she had slipped out in the dead of night to return and she hadn't gone near the well ever since.

Kagome prayed to any God up in heaven that her mother would not worry too badly, though it was possible that she would be too overwrought with the tragic demise of her 'son' to really care.

Kagome tilted her head by a sudden bizarre realization.

Souta was grieving from the loss of an 'older brother', Buyo had lost a beloved playmate (though the games were not always to the fat kitty's liking), Momma had lost a precious child, Shippo had lost a second father, Kilala a fellow demon partner, Kaede a grandchild, Miroku and Sango a trusted friend and 'family member', Kouga a foe but also means of…a rather strange friendship, Naraku a hated nemesis, and herself……..

…..the love of her life.

Inuyasha had always thought of himself as just the worthless half breed, nothing more, of course he had tried not to let that information slip. He didn't like being pitied.

She wondered briefly if he had any idea of all the wonderful roles he played, but except for the whole nemesis thing.

She hoped he somehow realized how deeply loved he was (again not by Naraku).

Wait a minute….she had forgotten someone!

_What about Sesshomaru? _

The older dog youkai had always made it quite clear he despised his younger half brother, but Inuyasha was also his only family member, his only brother.

How did he feel about Inuyasha's death?

Or even worse…..what if he didn't know?

Kagome felt the once normal twinge of pity, that feeling had once been such a big part of her life; she had always wanted to help people and to look on the bright side of things…until the means of her life's brightness was abruptly taken away. Kagome slightly rallied in the knowledge however that the 'old her' was still hidden somewhere in the deep dark cold of her soul, no the _half_ of her soul.

_I hope at least…that Sesshomaru isn't…too happy about……that day…_

Hope, what a strange notion. Did she have the urge to ever hope again, to ever feel the flare of hope in her chest?

Kagome's head popped up by Sango's sudden burst of laughter, the taijiya chuckles were not large or extremely mirthful, but Kagome could tell that it was not forced…and neither was the smile on her friend's face.

Sango was not pretending to be happy….Kagome sighed and sniffed.

She was actually being quite pathetic wasn't she?

She knew that she could perhaps never be happy again without her love, she probably could never find the thrill of life as appealing as before…that day, but…she had to remember…that she wasn't the only one to lose someone.

Sango…had lost more than herself…much more….Inuyasha was another attendant added to the long list of deaths the poor woman had to endure.

And yet she was smiling and giggling.

Kagome wanted to cry once again…..Sango was so strong.

Kagome then realized that of all the things her friends had gone through, her plight was the least, even though she had lost her beloved darling.

Shippo had lost his parents, his father twice.

Sango had lost her entire family, including another dear friend, plus her brother was walking the earth as an amnesiac mummy.

Miroku didn't seem to have any family as well, and in an awful bonus he had a curse in his right hand ready to swallow him up whole.

As for Kilala, Sango was her only companion before she had come to join their group.

They all had lost someone. And they all were still so brave.

_I could never be like that though………_

She could never feel the bubble of laughter, not with the vision of her love's lifeless body plaguing her dreams, and she could never truly feel like herself once again when a big portion of her was six feet under the heavenly God Tree.

But she couldn't lose hope.

She couldn't lose hope that someday they would avenge her love, destroy the jewel and also avenge Kikyou, make her friend's lives more happy and worthwhile, and then she….she would soon die and finally be one with her hanyou.

No, she couldn't lose hope…even if it was a tiny twinkle.

_**That's my girl…I was worried you were becoming weak.**_

Kagome closed her eyes and could see the glowing figure of her love in her mind, walking beside her in all of his stubborn glory.

_I told you before I'm not weak. _

The hanyou's pale imaginary face, wispy and smoke like, gave her a smirk.

**_Yeah, but you are a weak stupid human. _**

Kagome knew she was having another one of her 'dreams', pretty soon a noise would wake her up and she would find herself still walking across the meadow with the cruel reality that Inuyasha was really dead and buried.

But that didn't make her try to push him away; it was the closest she could ever get to see him again.

Just for a little while.

Maybe….maybe she could finally stay.

_**You know you can't do that.**_

Her hanyou's face became serious and slightly sad, his amber eyes not as sharp as they had been in real life bored into her own.

_What do you mean? _

Kagome's hand shivered by the ghost feel of warmth as "Inuyasha" grabbed her hand.

The real Yasha in doggy form, cocked his head in confusion when suddenly Kagome stopped walking and had her eyes closed, her mouth twitching with unheard words.

_**You can't keep lying to yourself, Kagome. You have to realize that I'm gone. **_

Panic began to seize in, no, she didn't want to go back not yet!

_**Kagome, I love you, but you have to move on. **_

_NO! No, I don't want to, not without you. _

His smile was gentle, so unlike him as he trailed a thumb over her lips.

_**I'm always with you, Kagome. You have to understand that, I'm always with you. **_

_But I want you really here with me, where I can touch you and…and kiss you, hold you close. _

Yasha nudged her foot and began to worry when nothing happened. She didn't even twitch when he whimpered and pulled her sock. _Oh, shit she's day dreaming again. Come on Kagome wake up!_

Kagome's vision wavered as barking reached her ears; she struggled to stay in her dream with her true love for just a little longer.

_I want to be with you, I want you to be real and alive again. _

His gruff voice whispered coolly, making her back shiver. **_I will…just wait for me…_**

That was strange, what did that mean? But before she could ask, which was stupid since he was only a figment of her depressed imagination, a pain pierced her ankle and she fell to the ground with a yelp.

Her eyes popped wide and she was greeted by an overly relived puppy bounding into her chest.

_Kagome, you stupid girl, you're okay! You're okay, you're okay… you…are OKAY! Oh shit, stop doing that to me. _Inuyasha snuggled into her and licked her cheeks and chin frantically.

This had been like the thousandth time that Kagome had gotten lost in her daydreams. This was the shortest of them all but it was also the most difficult so far to awaken her from them.

She had scared the shit out of him.

_Oh you're okay, you're okay! You need to please stop doing this to me, woman. _He whimpered to get her attention, for she was currently staring straight ahead, and white knuckling his sword; her hollow brown eyes turning glassy with tears. _Kagome…? Kagome, come on, please look at me, yell at me. I mean, your ankle's bleeding……shit I didn't know I bit her that hard………oh, come on you wench SAY SOMETHING!_

He was gone.

Kagome's throat began to close up, her eyes began to sting, and she was starting to have hard time breathing.

He was gone.

Reality check.

He was dead and buried miles form here and never coming back.

She knew she was dreaming, her mind knew better, but yet her heart felt like it was so real. Now that she was back in the real world, her heart's pain was as fresh and true as on…that day.

_But I don't want to cry! _Kagome felt another pain in her ankle and she blinked to look down at Yasha who was sinking his canines into her bleeding leg.

"Y—Yasha…" The pup looked relieved and released her foot gently to lick at the blood.

"Kagome!"

"Kagome, are you alright?"

Dammit, she couldn't make them stop. They had started and now they wouldn't stop. Tears kept trailing down her cheeks as she looked up at her worried friends…her pack…her family….Inuyasha's family.

Her throat hitched, she nodded to them saying she was okay, and then she burst into sobs.

"Kagome! Kagome, what's wrong?" Miroku, Shippo on his shoulder, stopped in his tracks by the unexpected outburst of despair.

"Kagome…?" Sango's voice was gentle, soothing and kneeling beside the distraught girl, she wrapped her arms around Kagome's shaking shoulders.

Kagome broke into another wave of sobs and she flung herself into her 'sister's' shoulder. "S—Sango….I'm sorry…I'm so sorry…I…I didn't w—want to cry anymore…I thought it was over…..but I….I miss him….I miss him s-so much…I can't make them stop…I can't stop c-crying…_dammit!"_

Sango wasn't fazed and actually hugged her closer; she rubbed Kagome's greasy and knotted hair and whispered softly in her ear. "I know…we all do…and we always will…it's okay to cry Kagome…we've all cried….it just shows how much we loved him and miss him…..it's okay…..and I'm the one who's sorry…I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you when you were in so much pain…hell you're still in pain…I know we all are….I'm sorry I wasn't a true friend to you in your time of need….Kagome…"

Kagome shook her head in the taijiya's chest and clung to her traveling kimono, "No, no, I'm sorry too. I'm sorry for…for everything! I'm sorry for not being as strong as you…I'm sorry for being so weak……I'm sorry…I'm sorry…."

"Kagome, you're not weak. It's not weak to be grieving. It shows that you care that….Inuyasha died. It shows that you loved him." Sango's eyes began to go glassy, "We all have been so careless….this is really the first time we've been together….for so long we've been ignoring everyone else and doing the one thing Inuyasha didn't want us to do….wallowing in our pain…..we did it so much that we forgot about everything else….that's not right…he wanted us to be stronger for one another…..to stay together…"

Miroku nodded and knelt beside them. "Inuyasha has human….I mean had human blood though….so I think he understood that we would feel things very strongly…..it's okay to wallow in our pain for a little bit…..I think he meant we shouldn't do it for the rest of our lives…..I think he would have wanted us to grieve together….to be stronger for one another in our despair…..it's okay to cry….but not by yourself…."

Kagome turned to him with tear traced cheeks and then hurled herself at him, hugging him around his neck. "Miroku…Sango…S-Shippo…..I'm so sorry for not being there for any of you…I didn't know what to do…what to say…I knew you guys were all hurting but I….oh God…I didn't really care…I mean I did but I was so…..so…broken that I didn't think I could do anything about it…..I'm so selfish…I'm so sorry…"

"Kagome….momma…its okay," Shippo hopped off the monk's shoulder and wrapped his tiny arms around the miko's neck. "We've all been selfish…but that's okay right now….we need to be strong….but its okay to be weak together for just a little while…its okay to cry together……Inuyasha would…well probably call us pathetic…"

Everyone chuckled dryly in choked throats.

"But I think….if one of us died…he would have cried with everyone too…..he would have showed how much he cared….somehow….he was rough around the edges….but I know that he must have had a hard life and when bad things happened to him…he…he didn't have anyone to cry with….I think he would understand…..I think he's actually crying with us right now up in heaven…."

_Or right here next to you all……_it sucked that dogs couldn't cry but Inuyasha knew that if he could….he'd probably be bawling his eyes out….that would have been really weird for him…but at least he would have had all of them with him.

His wonderful family, _it's okay to cry. _

Yasha stepped back a few steps and watched as his dear pack cried together, hugging and teary-eyed, sniffling but smiling. They were broken but he knew they were slowly putting the pieces back together.

He hoped that there would still be a spot in that puzzle for him once he returned. He hoped that they would welcome him back with joyous tears and tremendous love; he prayed to whatever God up there that he would still be wanted. _Please wait for me guys…please still love me and miss me…I'll be back soon…please wait…wait for just a little bit longer…_

Inuyasha began to feel a little unwanted as everyone cried and loved without him. It was like he wasn't supposed to be there, like he didn't fit in, even though he was supposed to be dead. They were crying about him. He really wasn't supposed to be there.

Dammit, that bitter sweet feeling of rejection began to unfurl a disgusting taste in his mouth. _Please still want me guys……when I return…please still love me……_

Inuyasha watched them for a bit but then stood up and began to walk away. _I shouldn't really be here…_his chest felt tighter and heavier with each step away from his family grieving and reminiscing about him.

Kagome glanced away for a moment to see the puppy walking away with his head bowed and ears drooped (unknown by him) and she frowned. "Yasha," she cried, "Yasha come here."

The dog spun around, his eyes wide, and he cocked his head to the side.

"Come here boy," Kagome opened up her arms and beckoned him to run over, "Come and be with us, it's not right for you to be excluded. You're part of the family and I think Inuyasha would have liked you. Come here and learn about the person you got your name from."

The pup looked hopeful, and a bit confused, but still didn't come to her.

"Ah, come on Yasha. We love ya, without you, I don't think we could have survived." Everyone nodded with Sango's words.

"You've been there for us so let's return the favor. You deserve some lovin'" Kagome giggled and patted her legs. "Come here and be with us boy!"

Yasha barked happily and bounded to them. He jumped into the middle of their loving circle to be hugged and petted with fervor.

He still had a role, he would still be wanted.

They just had to wait.

&&!))((

It must have been hours sitting on the itchy grass, laughing, crying, and talking about their beloved friend.

It must have been hours of retelling of good times, bad times, funny times, sad times, loving times, and all the other times in between.

It must have been hours of hugs and memories.

It must have been hours of remembering.

It was hours well spent.

Yasha enjoyed a tummy rub from a blessed Kagome, she did them the best, while he listened to the different point of views of him from his friends. The many different stories and adventures they all knew but didn't mind hearing or telling.

He was a bit perturbed with the constant reminder from them that he was stubborn and trying at times, but they made it up with the prideful words of him being brave and loyal.

They kept saying that he was a true friend, the best leader (at times), and that they would have never regretted meeting him.

They also kept saying how much they missed him and how they would do anything to have him back.

Oh, they would piss themselves if they ever knew that that was going to happen.

What a great secret. It was kind of fun knowing something they didn't.

Yasha chuckled through his nose and closed his eyes, enjoying a soothing rub down.

Suddenly a high pitched distant noise pricked his keen ears, someone was calling his name desperately, and whoever it was, was coming closer.

He jumped up and growled, getting everyone's attention.

"Yasha, what's wrong. Is someone coming?" Sango grabbed her boomerang.

"Do you feel any jewel shards, Kagome?" Miroku asked.

Kagome shook her head, "Nope, nothing."

"_**What's wrong, Inuyasha." **_

The pup glanced to a worried Kilala.

"_**I don't know. Don't you hear that? You do have better hearing than me. Someone is calling my name."**_

The neko, in her tiny form, pranced over to his side and strained her ears. **_"You're right, but I can't tell who it is."_**

"_**It sounds almost like…"**_

"Lord Inuyasha, Lord Inuyasha! Oh, Kagome, Miroku, everyone! There you are I have been hearing the most disturbing news. You must tell me that I'm wrong, where is Lord Inuyasha?"

"_**Myouga…oh shit…"**_

A tiny speck hopped to Kagome's nose and jumped up and down in panic. "Where has Lord Inuyasha gone! Please, don't tell me that what I've smelled and heard is true!"

"Myouga….where…where have you been," Kagome asked, hoping to gain some time to think about what to say. The flea was not going to take the news of Inuyasha's death lightly.

"Kagome, don't distract me. I've been all over, it does not matter. Now, tell me girl where is Inuyasha? People in practically every direction are talking about…about a brave and noble hanyou's death in battle. And I also caught wind of Inuyasha's blood a couple weeks ago. Please tell me he's alright!"

Inuyasha knew that the big death bomb was about to be dropped. _Ah, damn it to hell…he's not going to take it well at all…_the hanyou pup ran over to Kagome and waited for when he would be needed.

"I'm sorry….Myouga….we didn't know where you were…..a couple weeks ago….Inuyasha fought with Naraku………..and he didn't….he didn't make it…"

A tense horrible silence, the rest of the pack walked over to form a smaller circle around a shocked little old flea.

Myouga shook his head and let himself fall off Kagome's nose. Inuyasha took the chance to lean out and catch him, to have him land onto his own snout.

The poor flea didn't take any notice of the pup; tears began to well up in his wide bug eyes. "No, no…that cannot be right…not Lord Inuyasha…."

"We're sorry Myouga. Inuyasha is already buried under the God Tree. He's gone." Miroku shielded his eyes behind lowered lashes.

"No…_you're wrong! _Lord Inuyasha would never let that bastard Naraku kill him! My Lord is too strong!" Myouga pounded his little fists into Inuyasha's white fur. "It is not true; it cannot be true, you're wrong!"

"He's been…dead for a couple of weeks now…the gossip is true, Myouga. Inuyasha has died." Sango whispered the news. It had to be told to the poor old man gently. But she knew he was still not going to take it well. He wasn't so far. "Inuyasha is dead."

"**NO!" **It finally sunk in and the flea began to cry. "Please…no…not Lord Inuyasha….not that poor boy…….not him….please……not my master again…" Yasha wondered what Myouga meant by his last statement, watching the flea sob into his fur, when it hit him and Inuyasha could feel his chest tighten with pity.

Myouga had now endured the pain of having two masters die; his father and now him. _Poor stupid flea……poor Myouga…_

Inuyasha twitched his nose and whimpered. Myouga turned his head to look up into Yasha's big amber eyes. The flea sniffed and he whispered hopeful and disbelieving, "In-Inuya…sha? Lord Inuyasha?"

The pup scrunched his brow but then nodded a little. _Why did I say yes…It's not like he would believe me? _Myouga narrowed his eyes and moved to all fours to suddenly sink his nose into Inuyasha's skin.

That took the hanyou by surprise.

"**_Hey what the shit!" _**He barked. Inuyasha, in his normal irritation whenever the cowardly old man would bite him, lifted his paw and slapped him off his nose to the ground. He snorted at the flea, rubbed his snout and walked over to sit next to Kagome, still simmering with anger.

"Ah poor Yasha," Kagome patted his head, "Myouga what did you do that—"

"LORD INUYASHA!" Myouga who had been testing the taste of the pup's blood pounced with all his might for the dog once he had finished with his experiment. Inuyasha yelped by the sudden hugging attack and his eyes crossed by the flea jumping with enthusiasm on top of his nose. "Lord Inuyasha, it is you! I knew you could not be dead, oh yes, YES! Oh, Lord Inuyasha, what has happened? You're a dog, ha, that is funny! Now tell me what happened, I know that's you!"

It was another shocked silence, except for the old man's happy laughter.

_What……the hell…? _

"M-Myouga…what are you talking about? Inuyasha is dead….that's Yasha…a puppy I found after…In…Inuyasha's funeral…" Kagome scratched Yasha's ears and looked at all her friends with confusion.

"Ah, but don't you see? This **_is_** Inuyasha! He looks like him, to some degree, hey you have a tail! Oh, and he smells like him a little bit but the greatest thing is that _he tastes just like him too!_"

Inuyasha's eyes widened….as with everyone else's.

"What…the hell do you mean?"

The flea sighed dramatically and sat cross-legged on Inuyasha's nose, facing them, he cleared his throat, "This so called 'Yasha' is actually _Inu_yasha. His aura, his smell, his looks and taste, this dog is somehow our wonderful hanyou!" he clapped his hands and grinned.

"But…that can't be true….we watched Inuyasha die…how could…"

"I believe Myouga is correct…" everyone stared at Miroku.

"Okay, please explain monk." Sango leaned forward with skepticism written all over her features.

Miroku coughed into his palm before explaining, "Don't you feel it, Sango, even now. The aura around this pup, it is similar, or even maybe identical to Inuyasha's. I think we were all too deep in our grief to notice it at first. We also overlooked the rosary. It is supposed to work only for Inuyasha's soul….so why did it go around this dog's neck?"

A fulfilled awe and Inuyasha began to grow fidgety.

"You're….oh hell you're right! His aura, it is the same and let's not forget his eyes and ears, and even the color of his fur." Sango began to grin with a new born enthusiasm.

"Myouga, Shippo, what does Yasha smell like exactly." Miroku tapped his chin and his eyes gleamed.

Shippo hopped over to the dog that started and began to back away, his tail going between his legs. _Oh shit…_

The kitsune sniffed delicately, blinked and then took a big nose-full, his eyes widened. "It's true…it's true, it's true, I didn't notice before! Yasha smells like Inuyasha…except for a little bit of dog underneath but it still smells like him!"

Myouga laughed, "And even his blood tastes like the exceptional ones from my master! Don't you see this is Inuyasha!"

Kagome gently picked up the pup and placed him on her lap; the hanyou yelped by all the stares and huddled into her shirt. The girl rubbed his back soothingly to calm him down and closed her eyes to concentrate. Before long she opened them again and fresh tears rolled down her cheeks. "He does….he feels like Inuyasha…"

"Kagome…put him down on the ground and do me a favor…" Miroku bit his lip in thought.

Kagome did as she was told and Inuyasha could feel his ears droop in anxiety.

"……say sit…."

The puppy yelped and jumped away from them to start sprinting. _Get away, get away, get away, get away! Oh SHIT!_

"**SIT BOY!" **

Trip, slip, crash.

The rosary worked.

Great, the perfect time for the demon to decide to attack.

What a wonderful spring day!

**A.N Cliffie! HAHAHAHA! REVIEW!**


	9. You're here but I miss you

**Always There**

**Ch. 9**

It was almost like the good old days.

Traveling across a meadow on a beautiful spring day, talking and laughing, when suddenly he says something stupid and gets sat, that's when the huge snake-bull-monkey-lizard-crocodile-uh-thing decides to attack when he still can't get up from the spell.

Okay, put in the fact that he was technically dead and at the moment in a dog's body being trapped to the ground by the subduing spell……wait none of this was normal……except for the constant demon line of _"I am here for the jewel shards!"_…..yeah, that was the only normal thing.

It still was a pretty day.

_Okay, ten, nine, eight…_Inuyasha pulled himself as low as he could into the green sprigs of grass. Just a little longer, he had to keep himself out of the demon's vision before then.

_Seven…...six……five, four…_

"Yasha! You filthy thing you, you won't get the jewel shard or hurt my dog!"

_Oh, great Kagome thanks…tell him where I am……three, two…_

"Oh dog," the youkai's voice was, as always, deep and guttural, rumbling the earth between the pup's stomach, "I think I will have a delicious snack before I steal your jewel shards."

The claw descended downward.

_ONE!_

The spell let up and Inuyasha rolled out of the way, quickly hopping to his feet and sinking his canines into the demon's big scaly hand. Filthy, rotting like blood spurted into his mouth, burning his delicate tongue, but he didn't loosen his jaws. Even when the youkai howled in painful irritation and began swinging him to and fro, he still didn't let up.

Hey, he was a dog, but he was still was the same stubborn hanyou on the inside.

"Yasha, we have to help him!" Kagome cocked her arrow and began to aim.

"Wait, Kagome, you might hit Yasha!"

Kagome paused by Sango's words and stomped her foot in anger, "You're right, what are we going to do? We have to save him!"

"Of course we will, he's part of the family, we just have to think of something else…….wow, he certainly does remind you of someone doesn't he, he hasn't let go at all…"Kagome bonked Miroku's head and scowled.

"Can we talk about this later; we have to think of something!" Kagome cheeks began to turn a muddy red from her worry and irritation.

Sango gripped her large boomerang **(how do you spell the name?) **and began to sprint toward the demon, ignoring the talk between her pack. "Come on, hand to hand combat will have to do! Get a sword and help me!" She called over her shoulder; she then swung her boomerang across the ground to effectively slam into the demon's large sausage like legs. It howled in new pain and fresh anger.

"Right!" Kagome turned to the discarded Tetsusaiga she had dropped to the ground to cock her arrow, paused but then shook her head sadly, running off to join her already battling companions.

She couldn't transform the sword and she wasn't about to break it in half by rough-handling it.

Inuyasha's gums began to strain to the final extent, his jaws pounding with stress, and let's not forget his tongue felt like it was being burned by acid. But just a little longer, he was not going to let go, damn what he would do for his old body right now.

He wasn't sure how it happened, one minute he was chomping down a good two inches into the demon's disgusting flesh and the next his jaws were as weak as paper and it had affectively tossed him into the air. Luckily Kagome had been there, the pup and girl-_oomphed_- as he flew into her chest and she fell rather gracefully to her behind……okay not that gracefully.

Inuyasha rubbed his snout and shook his head to clear his muddled brain and growled, ready to bound back into the battle. But Kagome held him tighter and stroked his back, sending shivers through his body and calming the deep rumble in his throat, "No, Yasha stay here. We'll take care of the bastard…"

But then Shippo screamed by a way too close strike of the demon's claw to his little tail and Inuyasha's thrill of fighting thrummed into him in a big burst of adrenaline. Before Kagome could do anything to stop him, Inuyasha leapt from her arms and sprinted to the demon ready to take a good hunk of flesh out of the filthy thing.

Unfortunately, that was not a good idea.

He should have remembered that he wasn't a hanyou right now; he didn't have any of his great demon attributes like running or jumping. He was a little weak puppy in a tiny pathetic (though cute) body and was just….a normal dog.

So when the demon saw him coming and struck at him…there was no demon blood to help the hanyou see the attack coming….no demon blood to jump or deflect the attack….no demon blood to help him run out of the way…….and most importantly and _unfortunately _there was no great demon healing ability that was going to help heal the awful wounds he was about to receive.

So Yasha stuck his ground and welcomed the inevitable pain and prayed to any great God above that the same thing did not happen to any of his companions.

White fire laced through his back, neck, arms….basically every inch of his brittle body (his stomach felt like it was being burned into nothingness) when the claws struck and Inuyasha's keen kawaii ears were consumed by the sound of Kagome screaming his name when his world…..turned black.

!#&()(!#&&)(()&)&(TYFJKYTC#

There was no way he could have lived through it.

A claw had succeeded into striking through his soft underbelly which he loved to have her rub and it seemed like pints of dark red blood coated the ground.

Almost as much blood….as that day……the field was covered with it….almost like…that day.

_Please God…not him too…_

Kagome screamed her poor pup's name into the heavens, the syllables and shrillness of her hysterical voice merging into a painfully high, loud sound making even her own ears pound and bleep.

The same feeling of shock and horror, such as on another day, struck her chest, dropping a thousand pound weight chilled with ice into her stomach. Yasha, after being stabbed by the youkai's claw, kept skimming through the air to slam back first into a neighboring tree, creating a sickening snap. He crumpled to the grass…..and laid still.

Time as well….stood still, all members of the pack staring at the (seemingly unknown by them) second death of their dear leader.

Not again.

This couldn't happen again.

Not another loved one…..even if it was just a dog….

That was it….the demon bastard was going down.

It didn't last long, once the detached feeling evaporated and a ravenous adrenaline kicked in, the demon hardly stood a chance before being mauled and sliced and burned into ashes.

They didn't rest there before running as fast as they could to the bloody heap of _Inu-_Yasha.

Kagome sobbed and knelt down by the red furred, broken heap and cradled him to her chest. He didn't twitch.

"Please….don't tell me he's……" Sango dropped her boomerang, her arms not having the effort to carry it. Blood spattered her ankles by the demon bone's slap to the ground.

"Please tell me he's not….."

"Of course he is……..a dog couldn't live through that………dammit….why does life want to f……." Miroku trailed off with a sigh and dropped to his knees, to cast a weary hand to his chin for a prayer.

Suddenly Kagome laughed, hysterical with tears and relief.

They looked at her like she was crazy but she kept right on laughing.

Finally she got the sanity to explain.

"I can feel a heart beat! Yasha's alive!" Her smudged dirty face glowed with her smile and she fell under another giggle attack of pure liberation.

"What are you sure…..you must be mistaken!" Miroku crawled over like a hurried crab and stuck a hand under the pup's comatose chin.

Blood smeared his fingers and the monk closed his eyes tight to concentrate……..one…..two……thr-_THERE_! A slow heart beat, a mere thump against his finger pads but it was there and it was the pup's own. The dog was alive! Miroku smiled and his heart felt like it would shatter or either fall limp in his ribs with happiness.

He jumped to his feet, "Hurry, it's true, Yasha is alive but he may not be for long! We have to get Kagome's medical box and find a stream to clean him up and set those wounds! Oh dammit we have to stop the bleeding!" Miroku quickly shuffled out of the top layer of his kimono and grabbed the pup delicately from Kagome's arms, wrapping the unconscious Yasha in the many folds of the purple cloth.

The monk held him close and began to jog back to their camp site, calling over his shoulder in urgency, "Come on dammit, let's get on Kilala and find a river or something! Don't just stand there!"

The happy spell was broken and everyone realized that time was of the essence; Kilala re-burst into flames (she had transformed into her little self after the demon was destroyed) and growled that she was ready. Everyone else hurried like frantic moths to gather up their belongings and most importantly have the medical box, or first aid kit with them and ready.

Precious minutes felt like hours flying over the forest on top of the neko searching for any source of water, the puppy losing more and more valuable life giving blood staining the purple into a rusty brown.

Finally, a river…..and-OH BY THE GODS-even a hot spring!

They landed down and it was time for the work to begin, at all costs Yasha had to be saved, they could not fail like they had for another one of their dear companions.

In the safety of trees and prying eyes, Kagome stripped and dressed into her bathing suit (how conveniently brought on this particular spring day) and then dashed over to Miroku who was unwrapping Yasha, his almost unseen breathing beginning to sound wheezy and strained….but at least they could hear him breathe.

She clutched the dog gently as she could, walking straight out into the warm water, not slowing an inch until she was a good waist deep. Carefully, she lowered the pup below the surface, his paw twitching by the unexpected moisture, but he still made no other sound besides the wheezing.

Keeping his head up, Kagome hurriedly washed as much as she could of the horrible wounds; blood trailing out and dying the clear water, entrails of ghostly red twisting outward and around her form. Yasha's head lay limp against her arm while she gently trickled the hopefully clean liquid over the slightly gaping hole in his abdomen. His ears swiveled oh so slowly and lethargically by the drip, drop of the streams water falling from her cupped hand, but the small movement meant the world to her.

The blood still oozed over his creamy white fur but that was as good as she could get his body to be even remotely clean. Now it was time for the bandages.

That was when he finally began to make little noises, thankfully indicating he was still in the mortal side of heaven.

He squirmed and whimpered, pawed and groaned by each turn and tie of the itchy cloth wrapping around his torso, neck and one broken paw. His eyes clamped and released and even his teeth showed in a weak growl as Miroku secured the final loop around his hind leg.

"Hey, its okay boy…its all over now….you're okay….we're done…" Kagome rubbed his snout with one finger until he relaxed, whimpering again. She sniffed back tears and picked him up to hold him like a baby, trailing soothing circles with her palm on the fur seen between the bandages on his back. "Everything's okay boy….you were so brave….stick with us all right?"

Shippo tiptoed over and looked up at her with big pleading emerald eyes, "He is going to be okay, right Kagome?"

Her throat almost cracked with her answer of _yes. _

Miroku sighed and dusted his still bandaged (though quickly healing) hands, actually sticky with blood not dirt. "It is too soon to tell but I believe so, Yasha is a fighter…" the monk chuckled and stared down at his palms, "that I know."

"Come on, let's make camp and make sure he's comfortable," Sango said softly with an underline of command.

They did as they were told.

The fire crackled lazily, such as Kagome's hand as she softly petted _Inu-_Yasha's head. The sun was setting just as lazily casting soft pink and blue and other gentle colors across the sky. Yasha hadn't stirred or opened his eyes once, not even as he was laid across Kagome's lap which a fluffy feather pillow was set upon as well. He had to stay as comfortable as possible.

Kagome sighed, what seemed to be the thousandth time in the span of the couple hours, and leaned back against the tree behind her. Her butt was starting to prick with needle pricks of numbness and she kept subconsciously shifting, though her conscious mind tried its best to make sure she didn't strain Yasha's injuries when she moved.

_Come on Yasha please wake up soon…_

Not much conversations had gone on, no reminder of what they were talking before the demon attack, no attempt to say if they should make dinner as their stomach's began to growl, no…all waited and lounged for the first sign of the pup's awakening into the living world. They stared sightlessly into the fire and constantly sent quick assessing glances to the sleeping dog when they thought no one was looking….but everyone did notice they just didn't say anything since everyone was doing it as well.

It was a constant routine….fire, shift, look, shift, stare, sigh, shift, and then shift again ….the night's wonderful events thus far.

The hanyou pup had no idea; he just kept right on sleeping.

Kilala had moved long ago to curl up next to the passed out dog and to casually lick and nudge his chin lovingly, though even those constant movements didn't rouse him either. Sleep, lick, purr, sleep, sleep…….that was another part of their little nightly routine. Kagome didn't try to dissuade her. The neko had seemed quite attached to the dog as well ever since he had been welcomed into the family. She was just as worried as the rest of them.

Suddenly right when the full moon began to gleam amid the slowly presenting stars, Yasha groaned and bat his paw.

Kagome gasped and everyone immediately turned and stared intently, Kilala stopped her licking and nudging right away to stare as well.

The dog sniffed and whimpered when he moved his arm to rub his snout. Kagome gently grabbed his paw and caressed the soft fur soothingly, "Don't move boy, you're hurt…"

…………_hurt……? _The beautiful voice singing methodically in his ears was right, his entire body was sore and stiff, every little movement sending another prick of hot fresh pain through his muscles. He was hurt…but how…when….?

It was like walking through a spider's web, or a wool blanket, his thoughts were drugged and stubbornly slow, like a drunken man waking up to a nasty hangover. Every word was hard to think of and his mind's voice even sounded quiet and weakly whispered. He wanted to sleep, he wanted to sink back into the darkness, but somehow it felt like his body had other plans. But didn't it want the rest too?

……_everything……hur…hurts……just me…? I'm just hurt……right……? No one else……………Ka…Kagome…Shippo…they're okay right? Oh………ow……can't move………what…...happened…?_

Claws flashed in his mind's eye like wild fire and he was struck by a burst of wakefulness, didn't last long but it was enough for him to be able to open his eyes. His vision blurred sickenly and he struggled to keep his stomach's contents down. He noticed he was lying on something really soft, he was actually sunk in it, and there was another object fluffy and fuzzy curled up next to him, warming him comfortably. The other soft thing that had stroked his paw went back to rubbing his back again. He sighed and his eyelids drooped, leaving a tiny slit of amber.

Kagome smiled to see those beautiful amber orbs again and whispered to everyone, "He's awake now….probably not for long……but he's awake……how are ya boy?"

Inuyasha's eyes widened a tiny fraction to lift up to her as an answer before drifting close and open again in a drugged blink. Kagome's smile grew.

Shippo chuckled in his throat in happiness, "He's okay."

"Thank goodness…" Sango wiped her eyes tiredly.

But Miroku shook his head, "He may be awake but that doesn't mean he's okay, those wounds are pretty serious."

The happiness was struck down and everyone nodded sadly.

"Should we change his bandages now……"

Their voices dipped and swirled together in a huddled mass in his thrumming ears, his mind drifting in and out of the gray areas of consciousness. He couldn't concentrate, he knew that he was somehow critically injured but yet no feeling of fear registered in him, not even the occasional twinge of pain could wake him up fully. It was like every breath of Kagome's scent and oxygen was another dose of anesthesia. God, he was tired…

_**That demon sure did a number on you, huh puppy-kun? **_

Great now he was hearing things…did he pass out? Was he dreaming?

…_m-momma…?_

**_Yes, dear. How are you feeling?_**

Inuyasha smiled by the maternal worry in his mother's voice. Dream or not, it was nice to hear her again.

_Like hell……oh, sorry…I mean…I've felt better…_

His mind filled with her wonderful laughter.

_**That's good. Now listen to me puppy-kun, you need to stay calm for me okay? **_

…_uh, okay……since I can hardly move…I think I can do that………but…why…?_

_**Your wounds, like always really, are very serious. And since your new doggy blood is such a slow healer it's going to take you awhile to get better. **_

……_yeah…I figured……sorry for seeming impatient momma………but when is my old body……going to be…done…_

**_Soon, honey, very soon. Just some adjustments here and there and then it will be all finished. Try to stay patient. But now anyway, your body is hovering along the brink of life and death. We want to make sure you don't die again, bringing things back to life is kind of time consuming, so we're going to try something else. _**

…_o…okay……whatever………what are you going to do……I kind of don't want to die again either………at least not for awhile………_

His mother chuckled and he could almost feel the ghostly warmth of her hand caressing his cheek.

**_Yeah, I wouldn't either. Now, here's what we are going to do. We're going to slowly let a little bit of your old demon blood into your dog body. Not a lot to turn you hanyou or anything but just enough to heal your wounds. We're not sure what the complications could be, like maybe you becoming a mindless killer or something, so we need you to stay calm until we take the blood back. _**

Inuyasha listened groggily, even in his own head, and mentally nodded to her words. That news didn't even strike the sleepy daze around his brain's thoughts, he only wanted to sleep; he didn't really care what happened to him at the moment.

**_Do you understand, Inuyasha, we need you to stay calm all the way through, the best that you can. Can you hear me?_**

_Y…yeah momma……whatever……I'm really…tired…so just go ahead………I'll stay calm……it doesn't sound that hard……_

He could almost feel her smile softly. **_Okay, puppy-kun, I love you and I'm so proud of you. Sweet dreams, honey._**

Inuyasha's heart seized with the warmth any child would receive from his parent's love and he smiled a doggy smile, weak and slow. _I love you too……_

Shippo sat cross-legged next to Kagome, never moving his gaze away from Yasha's still face, his mouth opened partly such like his eyes, amber slits staring sightlessly at the living world. His chest went up and down in a slow beat, in….out….up…..down…..inhale……exhale……..thank God he was still breathing. ****

Then out of no where, the pup's eyes widened and red began to seep from the out side swirling like a whirlpool in his pupils. His entire little body stiffened and his last breath was sucked in with a gasp.

Shippo gasped as well and scrambled to his feet, leaning over the pillow to stare at the dog. He rubbed his eyes to make sure he wasn't seeing anything, but when he opened them again…….Yasha's eyes had colored even more red and a tiny slit of emerald green started to widen into pupils in the center of his wide orbs.

The kitsune knew those eyes……..they haunted his dreams and memories on quiet nights………they were the symbol of the evil once living inside his deceased papa………they had several times gleamed with blood lust and a sickening amusement as long knife like claws sunk into warm flesh and the stench of blood and death reeked the air in a dizzying plague………….they were eyes of the demon……….the demon form of Inuyasha………..

Shippo gave a high pitched shriek of fear and waved his arms frantically for attention, "Yasha, Yasha, his eyes, they're red, they're glowing OH HELL!" Everyone gasped and stumbled over to the dog.

"Holy shit…." Sango timidly reached out a hand and touched Inuyasha's nose, he twitched and a whimpered growl rumbled in his throat but he hardly moved. "What the hell is going on?"

Kagome shook her head, eyes wide, "I don't know….he has a….an aura…."

"A demonic aura….." Miroku answered matter-of-factly, "It feels familiar…..doesn't it?"

The miko nodded and Sango raised a brow, "What does it feel like, how is it familiar?"

Suddenly Myouga hopped over onto the pillow next to the prone pup, "Myouga," Kagome said startled, "When did you come back…I thought you ran away a long time ago when the demon attacked…"

The flea glared at her and coughed in his hand, "I was there……just…watching from the side lines….."

The pack rolled their eyes. Inuyasha whimpered.

Their attention went back to the matter at hand and Kagome worriedly stroked Inuyasha's spine.

"Can someone please tell me what is going on?" Shippo squeaked.

"It's Yasha's aura…….it somehow feels….like a demon….." Kagome answered confusedly.

"…Yes but it feels….more like when _Inuyasha _lost control and turned demon…" there was a shocked silence by Miroku's monotone words.

"That…that can't be true though….you must be wrong…Inuyasha is dead…"Sango struggled for words.

"Yes……he is…but then he is not…." They all looked down to the cross-legged flea.

Sango groaned frustratingly, "What the hell do you mean? You're not making any sense! Yes Yasha somehow looks like Inuyasha, smells and _tastes _like Inuyasha…the rosary even went around his neck and works…just like on Inuyasha…and now his eyes are turning red and demonic like…when Inuyasha………" the taijiya trailed off but then swiftly shook her head "……but…._but he's dead…_Inuyasha is dead, this is a dog! Okay!"

"Calm down, I understand that the Inuyasha we know is dead and that it seems unlikely that this little puppy could be Inuyasha…….but try to think this through….it can't be coincidence……I believe that somehow Inuyasha's soul has been…."

Miroku ended Myouga's words, "…reborn…"

Another shocked silence. Miroku ended that as well.

"Kagome…unwrap Yasha….take his bandages off please…I would like to see something…"

Her mouth opened and her throat chocked with words, "Bu—But Miroku…" she managed to utter, "His wounds…he could start bleeding again…"

The monk tilted his head, "I don't believe so……..I think…Inuyasha's demon blood is healing them…..take them off, Kagome…"

Kagome reluctantly did as she was told and their eyes widened by the sight of fresh new pink skin growing over the gaping hole in the puppy's stomach. She went and grabbed his broken little paw, rotated it a few times, and waited for Yasha to make some kind of sounds of discomfort….but he did nothing. His red eyes only stared sightlessly out in space, his mouth hung opened, and his chest lifting up and down in a calm rhythm.

His wounds were healing.

Yasha was getting better.

"But…but this can't….Inuyasha is dead…how could…."

Miroku, from kneeling on his calves, sat down comfortably and scratched his chin in thought. It took a moment before he spoke and every one listened tensely, wanting answers, "Myouga is correct in his assumption….at least from what I know…"

The flea bristled a bit in a _told-you-so_ manner.

"Somehow….Inuyasha's soul has been reincarnated….into Yasha…"

"But doesn't reincarnation take like hundreds of years or something, because I mean Kagome is a reincarnation of Kikyou and she's from 500 years from the future….Inuyasha has only been dead for a few weeks…" Sango rubbed her forehead exasperated.

"What do we really know about reincarnation though? Nothing, so maybe it doesn't really matter how long a soul's previous body was dead…….there's proof right here…..haven't you noticed the many similarities Yasha has to _Inuyasha_…besides just his appearance."

Shippo nodded and smiled, "Yeah, like Yasha loves stealing my ramen! And I've seen him sit over in the corner of Kaede's hut where Papa would always sit! And, And, Yasha leads us like Papa did when we traveled for jewel shards! Also doesn't the rosary only work for Papa's soul? Then why did Yasha fall to the ground when Kagome said sit! Oh my God, PAPA'S BACK………and….he's a dog…" the kitsune suddenly started to laugh, quiet giggles at first but then turned into hysterical guffaws. "Inuyasha is a dog….Papa's a puppy…."

Shippo's laughter seemed to be a mixture of relieved hysteria, hopeful disbelief, and a mending broken heart for he then began to cry.

The kitsune crawled onto the pillow and wrapped his arms around Yasha, his red eyes slowly fading back to amber during their talk and almost back to their original shade, and Shippo hugged him close, sobbing into his white and reddish coat.

"Papa's back….but he's a dog…….Papa can't talk…or fight….but he's alive….Papa's a puppy………but I want the regular Inuyasha……I want Papa……." He sniffed and buried his face in a confused, sleepy dog's neck, "so selfish……….so selfish…I'm so selfish….."

Kagome's eyes brimmed with tears herself, "It sounds farfetched but I believe it….Inuyasha…is back with us….as a dog…who probably doesn't even remember his past life…..but he's alive and back home with his family right? That's all that matters……" her lip quivered, "…but I agree with Shippo…..I want the regular stubborn, jealous hanyou back……I miss him even more…even though technically he's right here……I'm selfish too….." She hugged Shippo, who was still hugging Yasha, into her chest and cried a long with them.

The rest of the pack looked down to have two amber eyes pleading them for help and answers scrunched between hugging arms.

_What exactly did I miss……?_ When the rush of demonic strength had flowed into his veins, Inuyasha had fully concentrated on not thinking or moving, just breathing in and out, hardly even paying attention to his friend's conversation. When his body stopped feeling sore and burning with white-hot pain and the blood ebbed away making him feel light headed and tired, he was surprised to find himself clutched in a sobbing Shippo's grasp.

Understatement of the year, but he was a little confused.

Miroku smiled sadly, "It is nice to have you back Inuyasha……even though you most likely don't remember that you once were our best friend and pack leader….it still is nice to know that you kept your promise….to be there for us………sorry though…that we're so selfish to have rather wanted the regular you……sorry……we're sorry"

Sango hugged Miroku, her brown eyes glassy. "We do like you….actually we love you Yasha…we're sorry for all that we have been putting you through we just really miss…..the incarnate of you….we're sorry for being selfish…it's not fair…..everything is just really not fair…"

Okay, he just became even _more_ confused. **(Heck even the author is confused! Where the hell did all my good ideas run off to? Here ideas, here !)**

_What the hell is going on…? I'm alive aren't I? Why are Kagome and Shippo crying………and, wait…………did Miroku just call me INUYASHA? _

He yearned to understand all of what was going on…..but his brain felt drugged again…and his thought were starting to drift and ebb like water being cupped in loose hands. He was so tired……..again……so tired….

He'll have to figure everything out later, somehow is friends were crying because they thought his soul had been reborn as a dog, what was he going to do? They were so happy before and now…they were once again sad and crying……great….more work….back at square one…..it didn't sound very pleasing at the moment…….so tired…

His confusion thirsted for an explanation; wouldn't they have been happy that he was with them again? But his body was not going to hear his exasperated curiosity…..

_I don't……understand why I'm being squeezed to death……and why everyone is saying their selfish and……that they're sorry…………but damn it to hell……I am tired……I'll…just take a little……nap……and start over……make everyone happy……………………later_

Much later, for Inuyasha's exhausted body only took a few seconds to fall into unconsciousness. His pack huddled around him all night, staring with a confused mixture of relief, happiness, disbelief, and despair, even a little of disappointment. Inuyasha, to their hypothesis, was alive once again as a strange reincarnation. They loved the dog, with all their hearts, but it was a bitter sweet feeling to glance over at the sleeping pup and have their leader's face flash in their heads.

This must have been how Inuyasha had felt between Kagome and Kikyou.

Somehow the scab had been pealed away and the wound was bleeding once more.

The grief and sorrow had returned.

Who knew that technically 'having Inuyasha back' would make them miss him even more?

**A.N This was not my original story line but I guess maybe I thought the story was going to quick (to me at least, I know how it ends). I want it around as long as The Silent Hanyou….I guess anyway. Ah whatever, I just started typing and this is what happened, my original plot was not to have any of them find out. But whatever it's midnight and I'm tired….goodnight everyone……:passes out:**


	10. Some fatherly advice

**A.N **

**I would like to start by saying thank you to wonderful reviewer. Corrupted-Phoenix (I hope you don't mind) her review was long and supported; it filled my heart with a stunning urge to write. I love these kinds of reviews, full of praise and advice and _its more than one line! _**

**Basically she made me feel all fuzzy inside. **

**She also made a good point. She was the only one who told me in chapter seven Sesshomaru's and Inuyasha's point of view changed so quickly that she got confused. I understand that, for you see on WORD I had separated it with those little dash lines or and even tried typing &( but when ever I went on Document Management and put up my story, got rid of it and stuck all my lines together becoming the chapters you all have read. It probably did it again. **

**It's confusing and _I need your help_! Is some kind of typing button locked onmy log in or profile? Or am I typing things wrong? If you guys don't want to be confused any longer, than please help me!**

**Thanks for reading my frantic rants and pleas for help. **

**And thank you Corrupted-Phoenix, keep reading!**

**Always There**

**Ch 10**

It was pathetic.

It was like there was no meaning to his life now.

And that seemed even more stupid.

It had been weeks now, or so his instincts would tell him as he looked up to the sky and differentiated what time it was by the shape of the moon and the location of the sun.

Must have been only about two weeks or so, two slow agonizing weeks of thinking and walking; his new way of life it looked like.

And with every past day, these stupid torturous human emotions would become even harder to bear.

He damned them, he hated them, and he did not understand why he felt them.

He had no human blood rushing through his veins.

He had had no human parent or any kind of human blood lineage on his side of the family.

He was full demon, a full cold-blooded, malicious murderous demon who did not feel any emotions whatsoever, especially pathetic human emotions.

And yet here he was sitting against a tree, watching Jakken and Rin play with flowers in some random field. Or really Rin was throwing beautiful silk petals all along the grumbling toad's head. And feeling that sickening, twisting, wrenching storm of guilt, he assumed.

Guilt, regret, anger, sadness, grief; human emotions…..but then why was he, Lord Sesshomaru, the unfeeling bastard, being tormented by them?

_Because they are **your** emotions…_that tiny voice inside his head wisely mocked him.

On normal compulsion, Sesshomaru scoffed and thought that that could not be so. He could not be feeling these pathetic emotions on his own accord!

But yet he knew it was true.

Since that cold night he looked down upon his younger brother's grave, his emotions had been unlocked from that arctic prison.

He was still suffering from a confusing, meddling grief.

Whenever he would rest or a brief moment of peace and quiet would descend upon his group, those hellish thoughts would tumble into his mind.

Faces and memories, voices and scenes; he telling his brother he loved him and could never hate him and making his golden eyes sparkle with relief; he betraying that innocent trust and clouding those big eyes with grief and despair, broken; he stabbing his brother in the stomach, poisoning him, tricking him on that he had brought his human mother back to life.

He making his poor brother's life the deepest pit of hell.

Regret, guilt….would eat him alive.

His mask was breaking.

Harder and harder it became to not let the raging storm building inside of him to leak through his defenses and portray on his slender face. Harder and harder it became to stay the regular Sesshomaru he was before the death of Inuyasha.

He knew that perhaps…..that Sesshomaru was gone.

Sesshomaru turned his head to the side to look at where his left arm would be if Inuyasha had not hacked it off on one loving brotherly encounter. That was the first time the hanyou had ever gotten past him to actually inflict serious damage. The demon could still feel the pain and the eerie feel of his blood splurging onto the ground and the horribly meddling ghost pains he received for weeks afterward.

For days he actually felt like his left hand was itching…..but there was no hand to itch.

It actually…hurt…for quite a while.

But not like he would admit it.

And it didn't matter; he grew accustomed to only having one arm. He was not weak or pathetic.

However, this….wound…this _handicap_ was a constant ghostly reminder of his younger half-brother.

One look at that stump of an arm and the memories would come to torture him once more.

Sesshomaru sighed and slumped, the bark scratching his skin, and he lazily closed his eyes from the blare of the spring sun.

Wasn't Inuyasha born in the spring?

Great, you see, there they go again.

Pathetic, truly pathetic….and so far Sesshomaru did not like the feeling of being pathetic.

But what could he do? His ice was melting; he couldn't control them or push them back any more. _I suppose this is punishment…_and what a fitting punishment…but of course it could have helped if it was **before** Inuyasha died!

"_**You both hated each other to the very depths of your beings, and you didn't pause showing it."**_

_No…I did not……stabbing him, hitting him…trying to kill him…of course, I wanted him to know that I hated him………at least I must have hated him……_

"_**You always had a reason…. but Inuyasha, however, only seemed to hate you because you hated him."**_

_Did I have a reason…?_

"_Get away from me, I hate you! It's all your fault, you killed him, you destroyed everything! You stupid…stupid HANYOU! I'll kill you!"_

"_But you……you promised…"_

"…_I…I lied! I hate you, I wish you were never my brother! You're just my stupid, pathetic…HANYOU HALF BROTHER!"_

_It wasn't his fault……he was only a young pup……I was his big brother……we both lost our family but we had……each other……and yet I failed him……_

"_**His life was hard and cruel…you should have been there…you should have been his older brother………..He needed an older brother……YOU were the one that failed HIM…!"**_

Sesshomaru wrinkled his nose by the way his feelings bombarded him even harder by these ghostly voices.

_Needed me……I failed him……I'm sorry……but now its too late……My apologies are stupid and petty……I failed…he's gone……Inuyasha…_

"…_**but even so….he was proud to be called your brother…"**_

_Proud of what…?_

"_Nii-san is so good at this game!"_

"_No, Nii-san does it better! I want Nii-san to do it!"_

"_Do you promise to always be my big brother?"_

"_You're the best brother in the whole world. I love you, Nii-san."_

"_**I…I love you too…"**_

"**_My…little brother…" I'll protect you._**

_Inuyasha……I was…it was all my fault……I'm sorry…_

"…_**hated you only because you hated him…"**_

…_but……but I don't think I did……I don't think I ever did……damn it to hell……it's too late now……I'm sorry little brother………it's too late now…_

**Not quite. It's never too late, my son.**

_What the…?_

Sesshomaru grunted and opened his eyes….what he saw….scared the shit out of him…..or at least surprised him as much as he would show.

Instantly he mustered all his self control and schooled all expressions from displaying on his face.

_Father…? _His voice was cool and distant.

The tall, formidable stature of his father glowing in the sun nodded his head, his golden eyes sparkling.

**Hello, Sesshomaru, how have you been?**

Sesshomaru stood up and looked around. They were still in the field but Rin and Jakken had disappeared and the grass seemed to glow a whitish heavenly aura.

_Where are we?_

His father smiled. A strange look for the younger demon to see, his father never smiled much when he was alive.

**You are dreaming of course, I'm dead, remember? I'm here to send you a message. It may surprise you.**

_What kind of message? No news could render me any emotion._

His father's smile turned into a smirk….a smirk Sesshomaru had seen many times before.

Guilt.

**Is that so, Sesshomaru? That is not what I have observed. You seem to not be taking the passing of your _weak, pathetic…_**

Sesshomaru managed to keep himself from wincing.

…**useless half breed brother very well. Tell me…what do you think is happening to you.**

Sesshomaru knew he could not lie to the ghost of his father. He narrowed his eyes.

_I came to the conclusion……that I am suffering from a stupid humane grief. _

**Stupid….perhaps…it is said that demons cannot ever feel any remorse or grief, any "human" emotions whatsoever. Than why do you think you, my son, are feeling these emotions?**

His father walked up to Sesshomaru, his hands locked behind his back, he walked around his son with that same smirk on his slender face. Sesshomaru gritted his teeth.

**Why do you think that the one person who despised, and hated his younger half brother to the very depths of his icy being…is feeling such inadequate things like regret, guilt…and sadness by a death that he wanted to succeed in doing in himself?**

**Why, my son? Shouldn't you be feeling….satisfied? Or are you going to give me the worthless excuse that you are only feeling this way because you are angry you could not kill Inuyasha yourself? Tell me…I would like to hear your answer…**

The younger dog demon tried with all his might to keep from growling…dammit

_You are amused, are you not father? You know I do not have a sufficient answer._

His father grinned, his fangs gleaming and he stood back in front of his son.

**Yes, I am quite amused, Sesshomaru. I feel great delight in seeing you squirm with your feelings. It has frustrated me how you always pushed them away. I suppose you are correct that this could be called punishment. But that would be….what would be the right word….inadequate? I find it quite stupid that you are feeling this way.**

Now Sesshomaru was suffering from anger and confusion. Dammit, damn it straight to hell!

_What the hell do you mean, father? I thought you said you are…glad that I am feeling this way._

**So you admit you feel such feelings, that they are your own?**

_Yes, dammit! I don't like it…it's stupid, pathetic, weak…but I know I am feeling them! I hated looking down onto Inuyasha's grave and having Tenseiga lay useless against my side! I hated knowing that I made his life……that I…_

Sesshomaru bared his fangs and looked away.

**Betrayed him….failed him…? Are those the words you are struggling to find? **

Sesshomaru didn't answer. His father gave a sad sigh.

**I know that is what is bothering you. We dog demons have strong feelings for our clan, so I was amazed you and Inuyasha could push them away and try to kill each other for so long. But yet I always have known that they were there…underneath the hatred…the ice…or fire concerning your brother…quite a temper that boy…**

There was a pause as each demon stared off into space. Sesshomaru finally broke the silence with a soft monotone voice, like stating the weather.

_He still hates me…doesn't he? I would like to think that you have talked to him in the afterlife. What were his exact words……I don't see how he could have gotten rid of all that hatred…_

His father blinked…a bit surprised by the question…but then he smiled.

**Yes….yes I have spoken with him. I have not seen Inuyasha in life since he was but a pup…so it should not surprise anyone that I wanted to see him face to face…..man to man…**

_The reunion must have been to your liking._

**Quite, it's frustrating watching over all of you but not able to say anything.**

_Than why are you here talking to me now?_

**It is a special…occasion…I guess you could say. The news I must deliver…and advice as well…is quite important.**

_Than why don't you tell them to me now?_

His father chuckled and shook his head.

**I have not seen you for awhile, also, correct? I can tell you are a little angry with me though…or more likely with yourself. But didn't you ask me a question earlier? I should answer it for you. Come…sit down with your old man, Sesshomaru.**

The great Inu-tai-youkai sat down in a cross-legged position and raised his brow to see what his son would do. It was a challenge that was clear.

But Sesshomaru wasn't afraid of any challenge.

He would never back down…especially to his father.

The younger youkai sat down and relaxed, though his mind was wary and extremely cautious to what would happen next.

His father smiled and then turned away, his grin falling into a serious expression.

**You had asked how Inuyasha could have gotten rid of all that hatred towards you. I believe you got that notion by what his monk friend told you a while ago? Am I correct?**

Sesshomaru nodded and kept staring out at the glowing ghostly horizon of his dream world.

Funny…he didn't think his dream landscape would be so…bright…

His father gave something akin to a snort and a chuckle as he shook his head in awe.

**I must admit…I didn't really expect that from little stubborn Yasha. He and his pride…probably got that from us…sure gets us in trouble sometimes. Like Inuyasha and that human girl…Kagome, I believe. Nice girl, I like her. I think she's the one who helped Inuyasha the most.**

_Are you buying time, father?_

His father sighed.

**I have a lot of time Sesshomaru. At least now I do. **

He smiled and looked up.

**I'm with my love again…and I spoke with your mother…we have no grudges or hatred towards one another anymore. And now I'm in peace with my beloved Izayaoi. **

But then his smile grew sour and he turned to Sesshomaru, who was watching him intently.

**Its life that eats up time and you are wasting it, my son. You don't know what you have until it is gone. Death is fine, not as horrible as I thought it would be. But that does not mean you should waste your time in the living world. Yes, there is pain…regrets…sorrows….you lose things and feel that all is for not. But you do have a family Sesshomaru…you have that cute little girl Rin…even that annoying toad…who both stick by you no matter what situation.**

He paused.

**You have things to protect my son.**

Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes and turned around to face his father.

_I understand father……I know what you are saying…I've discovered that if you will. But it feels that you are dodging something with me. _

**Ah, yes! **His father's sad wisdom, as fast as it had come…vanished with a smile. **You wished to know what I spoke with your brother about.**

Sesshomaru blinked and bit back the oath he wanted to shout. He knew there was something more. His father, it seemed, was amusing himself way too much with dancing him in circles. Strange….Sesshomaru had never seen his father like this when he was living; having fun, speaking his mind….at peace. Sesshomaru cut off a sigh and listened to what his father was going to say.

It was…….nice to see him again…

**It's quite funny, in a weird way; after your brother died he had to…wait for awhile.**

_That must not have been pleasant._

His father chuckled.

**Of course not, knowing him…but don't judge him too quickly. He was, for the first time, patient. Did a lot of reminiscing and thinking, when he was by himself, you could tell. But what I thought was…a tad bit amusing…was that he was absolutely bent…that he was going to be sent to hell.**

Sesshomaru blinked.

His father chuckled again and nodded his head.

**Yes, I thought it strangely…out of place as well. He did bad things…but most were accidents or for survival. And there was no way he was going to go to hell for the circumstance on how he died. But he thought he was for sure, going to go to hell. It's an understatement, but Inuyasha was feeling a little guilty about his life.**

His father laughed.

**You would have loved to have seen his face when he told him he was actually going to come back to life…**

_What?_

Sesshomaru immediately took a hold of himself. His first outburst...in front of father….!

Sesshomaru was beginning to experience a new sensation…..embarrassment.

The great tai-youkai seemed a little surprised himself but then he smiled…his smile turned into a grin….and before long the great powerful demon who had slain hundreds…was laughing his head off.

Sesshomaru frowned and ignored it.

Which was increasingly a hard thing to do….his father did not laugh….at least not the father he knew.

And his father did not slap him on the back in his mirth either.

**That face! That face was almost like Inuyasha's! So priceless! I knew you two had more in common than you had first thought. I was hoping this conversation was going to prove amusing.**

_If you could kindly stop laughing, **father.** I would like to demand for an explanation._

His father managed to turn his guffaws into tiny chuckles. **I'm sure you would, son.**

Sesshomaru frowned as his father let loose another bark of laughter before trying to put on a solemn face. You could tell he was struggling to keep it under control.

_So…Inuyasha is alive…_Sesshomaru struggled as well to get the conversation to turn more serious. He did not mind for this new emotion. _How is that possible…and why have I not smelled him at all? _

Fortunately the great dog demon became the somber man he was known for, or at least the man Sesshomaru had known.

**You wouldn't…his scent his familiar to some…but it's…uh, his _appearance _that quells the stroke of similarity. When you see him and look hard…you see a lot of things that were the same before he had died, such as his eyes and ears. But everything else…** he rolled his hands in the air…**is…well…not Inuyasha.**

_What do you mean?_

**I'd rather…let you find out for yourself. And I'll have Inuyasha explain everything to you as well. I cannot stay long.**

Sesshomaru looked away and mulled over this…interesting piece of new information.

Inuyasha was alive.

By that sudden realization sinking in there was a sudden surge of warmth in his chest…and there was another sensation…as if a huge boulder had been lifted off his shoulders.

His little brother had not died.

Well…he did…but he came back.

He seemed to be starting to get used to these emotions.

Relief…was one that he could learn to like.

Sesshomaru shook his head which was spinning with thoughts and turned to his father.

_What…is supposed to happen now?_

His father smiled that soft fatherly smile at him once again.

**Inuyasha is maturing everyday. He has come to terms with many things. You and he are…to me at least…the final relationship that is still broken. But it is never too late to fix it. Remember to not waste life…especially about such trivial things. He still needs you, my son. Evil is still afoot and you cannot win with separate forces. He still needs his older brother. **

"_Yay, Nii-san is here!"_

"_You're the best brother in the whole world."_

Sesshomaru shook himself out of his thoughts when suddenly his father stood up. He joined him to his feet. Out of no where his father wrapped his arms around him and gave him a quick, manly muscular hug.

His eyes must have still been wide and his body was still stone stiff when his father let go and gave him a serious look.

**Help your brother, Sesshomaru…and most of all…enjoy life. We'll see each other again soon. **

He stepped back and his outline began to grow fuzzy and distorted.

_Wait…father…!_

Sesshomaru stepped forward and he could see his father smile.

**I'm still proud of you my son….and I still love you. Oh, and I almost forgot…here's a gift that could prove useful. **

His father snapped his fingers and Sesshomaru abruptly fell to his knees as white hot pain lashed up his arm, billowing down his spine all the way to his toes.

**It may be painful but I think you'll thank us. **

The younger demon's vision began to waver and blacken. _F-father…_

**Goodbye my son. **

The last wisp of the tai-youkai's voice merged and lessened into a hum and Sesshomaru fell into a drugged sleep, finally being relived of the pain still coursing down his arm.

It was the deepest sleep he had ever been in.

**A.N It's short but I just had to update something. Send me what you think is going to happen next, its amazing how close some of you get. I'll put up another chapter soon; I have a two hour computer time curfew now and can't be on it long. But I will see you guys soon! **

**And sorry for the OOCness, Sessho is hard,I got bored and didn't give a real damn. Also I saw the third movie and you guys were right. Their dad was WAY OOC IN MY STORY! But...whatever...I don't want to fix it...it would ruin everything (to me at least) and besides I like my Dad version better.**

**OKAY, BYE BYE: ) ...for now...BWAHHAHAHAHAHA!**


	11. Where's the happy ending?

**Hey, thought I should tell you if any of you get confused with the time frame. Sesshomaru's talk with his dad said it happened on a spring _day_ while in this new chapter, back with the Inu gang, is on the same night that everyone discovers Inuyasha's soul was reincarnated and they all start crying. Let me try to get things straight, since I messed everything up. Just pretend that the Dad talk happened at the same time Inuyasha and his friend's were battling with that demon. And now Sesshomaru is still fast asleep while this chapter is happening. Got it, good. Now get reading. Sesshomaru will return in later chapters, I'm sticking with the Inu gang for awhile since their pain has been born anew. I'm so evil. Review!

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**Always There**

**Ch 11**

Tears are meant to relieve your pain. Tears are meant to let out a soul's anguish, grief, and hopelessness. Tears are meant to wash away the dirt and grime coating your heart, breaking you, and hurting you with each sharp breath. Tears are meant to exhaust you, take you away from the harshness of reality and sink you into a blissful sleep only to wake in the morning hour and feel that horrible but thankful numbness. Tears are supposed to bring people together or scare them away.

Tears are helpful…and damning.

With every droplet that coats down your cheek, with every particle of salt stinging your eyes, it can ease the pain….or make it unbearable.

Grieving tears are a soul's worst pain. You die a little inside with every drop of moisture that falls onto your trembling hands. With every shaking cry and wail for the person you've lost, the hole forever placed in your heart and soul grows a little larger. The numbness sinks in, surrounding you and comforting you when at the same time sending you to your doom. For when the scab falls and the wound is bleeding once again, all the grieving, sadness and despair which had been growing every past day envelops you and swallows you whole. You are stuck in that deep dark chasm, praying and hoping for death, savior, love, or some semblance of peace.

The loss of a soul mate could be the worst pain imaginable. A part of you forever sliced away and you feel half empty, half important, and half alive. Every single thing reminds you of that lost side, a book, a picture, a song, a memory reborn by a little insignificant thing. The pain begins again, you sink a little lower and when you think you can dig yourself out, something else pushes you back in. You feel that no one can save you.

Kagome was feeling that way now. Every glance at the little sleeping pup in her lap and the wound would bleed again. Inuyasha was with her….but then he was not. She wanted to talk to him, feel him, and see him angry or sad, happy or acting like that innocent, stubborn boy she fell in love with all those months ago. But he couldn't do that….

If it was true that her love was reborn into this dog, there would be no way he could be the same hanyou she had known. She should be feeling…happy somehow though since he was finally with her again.

And yet she was being selfish. She wanted the regular Inuyasha. With that thought, the wound would pulse with fresh pain and the hole would fall deeper and swallow her more.

Yasha didn't deserve this. If the soul residing inside him was Inuyasha's, he deserved love and acceptance. The hanyou never had that when he was alive. No, he did have that……but they were late on showing him…she was late on giving her heart….and receiving his in return.

They were always late….

Why couldn't she have told him before it happened? Why couldn't she have placed her heart and her soul on a platter and shove it into his chest and see what he would do with it? Why couldn't she have taken a chance? Why…was she such a coward?

Tears were coming again. The hole grew bigger….she grew more tired. Blessed numbness would return….more choking than before….but when it fell away again….

She knew she would die.

The night grew steadily towards dawn and she had not once had tried to close her eyes and fall into dreams. Dreams where everything was back to normal and she was with her love, healthy and strong. But she knew it wouldn't be real and the damn tears would befall her once again when she awoke to bright sunlight.

Kagome stroked Yasha's flank absentmindedly and sniffed. She should have brought tissues with her. She felt stuffed and disgusting. The miko sighed and looked around the camp. Everyone had succumbed to an exhausting slumber. Twitching from disturbing dreams more like it, not happy ones. The retelling of happy stories hours before….were forgotten. When seeing that Inuyasha had returned….but not as their leader….relief and happiness wouldn't come and only that dark memory of Inuyasha's torturous death kept flashing again and again within their mind's eyes.

They were selfish…so very selfish….they probably deserved this pain of reminiscing.

And yet she didn't know why they deserved it. What did any of them do wrong? What did Sango do to deserve to lose her family and have to fight against her younger brother? What did Miroku do to deserve a cursed hand that made him live in constant fear? What did Shippo do to deserve watching his parents be murdered, made into a clothes, and then seeing another one of his family members slaughtered? What did Inuyasha do to deserve such a God damn horrible life full of pain, rejection, sorrow and then suffer through guilt and regret and _then_ to die such a horrendous death?

What did any of them do to deserve this?

Why did life end up this way? Why did things like this happen?

_Where was the happy ending?_

Kagome covered her face and shuddered, more of those tears leaking past her defenses. None of this was fair, what were they supposed to do, where was the lesson or miracle coming out of this? Why did this have to happen? Would life go on after Naraku was defeated……_if_ he was defeated? Were they meant to all die and have the story of their lives be made into some child's rhyme to teach them not to fall in love with a hanyou or travel through time?

Was Naraku going to kill them all and wreak havoc onto the world, no one to defeat him? Was this how history was going play out?

"But…..but my time isn't like that……there is no Naraku in my time…..what does that mean…do we defeat him…..do we create peace and then disappear…why does this have to happen…..?"

She didn't care anymore….she didn't care who saw her, who heard her….Kagome broke down into sobs.

Yasha twitched and shifted.

Kagome leaned forward and cried all over the little pup, tears dripping onto his no longer bandaged fur. He was healed….Inuyasha didn't die again, another horribly painful and grisly death…he was alive and well….his soul was with them….her soul mate had returned….

It only served to make her cry harder.

"None of this is fair….why is this all so damn…." Her voice cracked and she laid her forehead down on Yasha's flank, wrapping her arms around him. "Why is this happening….oh, Inuyasha I need you…..I need you here with me as your normal self….I need to hug you and kiss you…..damn it to hell, even _argue _with you….I need to hear your voice….see your face…your eyes and hair and smile….your cute little ears….I need you…I wish I told you sooner. I wish I told you that I loved you in the very beginning…even if you still loved Kikyou and hadn't found that you loved me too…I wish I did….even if it hurt. I wish we could start all over…"

Inuyasha opened his eyes groggily and twisted his head to Kagome's direction, her black greasy hair falling onto his face. He blinked and whimpered to get her attention.

Kagome hiccupped and looked at him in all her red-eyed and nose-running splendor and beauty. She tried to smile but her lips only quivered and she choked back another sob.

_Kagome……what's wrong…why are you crying…? I thought you were okay…I thought everyone was okay now…why are you all making my job so damn difficult ……_Inuyasha twisted his lethargic and heavily fatigued muscles and snuggled into her. _Come on…stop crying…this is all pretty stupid. You'll feel like such a baka for crying once I get back…so please……stop …_

Kagome opened her eyes and stared into his sleepy amber orbs, she stroked his snout. Yasha gave her a doggy grin and she smiled weakly back "H-hey….boy….I'm sorry…..I…I didn't mean to wake you up…." She sniffed and swallowed a few times to stop another wave of sobs.

_Well you did…you stupid girl…so why don't you tell me what's wrong…_he tilted his head and nudged her chin.

Kagome gave a dry chuckle and wiped her eyes, "You know…..you're actually…..a _lot_ different from him…." Her smile fell, "if you were really my love…..you would be barking at me and trying to ignore me…he never liked to see me cry…"

_No…and I still don't……and before…I **would have** tried to ignore you or say something stupid to make you angry so you would stop…I always felt that it was my fault that you cried………feh, probably was most of the time……but I'm different now, Kagome……I've seen a lot of tears……I understand why you all feel this way……I can take it now……I can help you feel better……so talk to me……_he gave a weak yip and wagged his tail. _And don't make me say it again._

Kagome shook her head away from her thoughts and smiled at him again, "It's really kind of stupid of me to feel this way, you know? I shouldn't be so selfish and you don't deserve that…a homeless little stray like you…you need love….not everyone's grief dumping on you. You don't need that kind of responsibility." She tilted her head and chuckled, "But look at you….you probably like feeling so needed don't you…?"

He yipped and wagged his tail once more.

Kagome giggled, "Say…how 'bout we go back to that hot spring? You still have blood all over you and God knows I need a bath. Let's go relax and clean up. I can't sleep anyway."

Yasha gave a disapproving growl but nodded. _Okay…but you better talk to me later. _He struggled to his feet but ended up falling back down on shaky legs.

Kagome giggled and hugged him to her chest, "Hey, hey, don't worry, I got ya…you need to save your strength big boy…let me carry you…" She got to her feet and a small whimper reached her ears. Kagome turned and saw Shippo curled up into a little ball next to where she was sitting, shivering and moaning. She frowned and knelt down.

With one arm she scooped the poor kit up and gently laid him down on the pillow that Yasha had slept on. He whimpered again and said something incoherently from his dreams. Kagome stroked his orange hair and kissed his forehead, "Shhh, don't cry little one. Everything…..everything is going to be alright….I'll be right back. Don't let the nightmares scare you…stay strong…your Papa" Kagome's eyes grew glassy with pain and grief "…..will look over you…sleep tight….we all love you…"

Shippo's face relaxed and he snuggled into a comfortable position. She ruffled through her book bag for a moment and yanked out a blanket and her bathing supplies. Kagome tucked the soft cotton around the little demon and he sighed contently, whispering out, "Mama……Papa…."

She kissed him again, "Sweet dreams, Shippo. We love you." And grabbing her belongings, holding Inuyasha tight, she walked out of camp.

Inuyasha looked out upon his camp and his sleeping family from the warm confines of Kagome's arms. _I……I love you all too……_Inuyasha thought and he whimpered. _I really do……_

* * *

_Oh shit, oh, shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh damn, oh shit_…Inuyasha placed his paws over his eyes and kept repeating his mantra as Kagome stripped out of her clothes. He uncovered one eye, saw her bare backside glowing in the moonlight and he yipped, cowering into a ball. _Oh shit, why does she have to get undressed? I would be forever face-planted in the ground if I was watching this as my normal self. Oh damn it to **hell**, what am I going to do!_

Kagome stepped into the warm sultry water, goose bumps rising all over her flesh. God, it felt so good. She turned and covered her mouth to keep herself from bursting into laughter when she saw her little hanyou pup's antics.

Yasha was laying on the ground, his paws covering his face, and his tail in between his hind legs in fear. His ears were all the way flat against his head and he was whimpering slightly, anticipating (for he was so accustomed on what would happen to him in circumstances such as these) for a sit to come.

She sat down in the water, rising over her exposed chest, and gulped back her giggles, "Yasha, come here boy. You don't need to be so shy. I won't bite…or say the 's' word, okay?"

He cautiously poked one eye out from his paws to look at her and she swore that she could see wariness and embarrassment in those orbs. His tail wagged uncertainly.

"Yes, Yasha, you won't get in trouble. Now come here, you and I need to get all squeaky clean." Then she frowned in concern, "Or can you not walk, do I need to carry you over here?"

The pup snuffed in disgruntlement and with dignity in tact, stepped to his feet and strutted over to her. _I can walk woman, I'm not some weakling…_but after a few steps his knees started shaking and he collapsed to the dirt. His legs felt like jelly and his heart was racing. Apparently, his body wasn't ready for a lot of physical activity such as yet.

Kagome yelped in surprise and ran out of the water over to him, "Are you alright, Yasha? Are you hurt?" She knelt down next to him and picked him up in her arms. He groaned, _I'm fine wench…just tired……_Inuyasha opened his eyes and all of the fatigue he was feeling before disappeared. _He was being held against her naked chest!_

The hanyou yipped and struggled, squeezing his eyes shut. Kagome only held him tighter, giggling, and stroking his back. "Oh come on, Yasha. Relax, Have some back bone. No need to be so embarrassed, I won't do anything to ya." He froze, his eyes still closed, and she began walking back into the water.

_Oh shit……she's so damn warm and soft……oh damn it to hell! I'm going to be so doomed when I get my old body back! _Inuyasha flinched when the water reached him, but he slowly started to relax as his muscles began to unwind from the heat. Kagome turned him over in her arms and started to rub his stomach, Yasha groaned in pleasure.

"That a boy, some nice R&R. Feels good doesn't it?" she cooed and made circles in his soft fur. Inuyasha dazedly opened his eyes to mere slits and looked up at her glowing face.

Her brown eyes had darkened to a vibrant violet like color, twinkling from the stars and the moon behind her. Her skin glowed and her black hair splayed all around her in majestic waves. It was difficult to explain……he could come up with so many metaphors and similes of how beautiful she looked just then….an angel…a butterfly perhaps…it wouldn't be enough….he wasn't good with words anyway.

All he could say was that he fell in love with her all over again.

Kagome rubbed his snout and scratched the back of his ears, his eyes drooped and he puppy-grinned up at her. She smiled and lightly kissed the top of his nose, "I love you, Yasha. I want you to know that. I'm sorry for being so selfish and moody, I'm sorry that you came into our pack at such a….hard time. But always remember that we love you and you are a permanent member of this family. Do you understand, boy?"

Inuyasha's grin fell away and he tilted his head. _Wow……_was all he could think and he slowly nodded. Kagome smiled and wiped another tear from the corner of her eye.

"I'll always miss him, Yasha….and I'll always love him. I'm sorry, but you could never be his replacement…and besides that would be cruel anyway. You have your own special role in this pack….and your own special place in everyone's hearts. And now I'm getting a little too mushy for you, aren't I?"

Inuyasha nodded again and she laughed, the tears falling faster. "If you are Inuyasha's reincarnation……I 'm pretty sure that you don't remember anything from your previous life anyway….I mean I don't with Kikyou." Another laugh, dryer this time "Hey…we…we're kind of alike aren't we? Two reincarnations of important souls, two second bests…at least I'm not alone in that anymore, huh?"

_Second best…? Is that how I made you feel? _

She slowly turned away and sighed, "I'm being selfish again…..Kikyou's probably in pain too….I mean she's still in love with Inuyasha. And…he loved her too….I'm confused now….he said he loved me, did he just choose? Wake up one day and say, 'Oh, I love Kagome more!' I don't understand….." shook her head, "but this is stupid…I shouldn't fret about it and just feel content….or as content as I can be without him…….stupid…"

Inuyasha blinked. _Wait a minute…that's…actually a good question ……how did I start loving you…when? _

He looked off into the middle distance and thought long and hard.

But…no answer would come.

Basically….it was like Kagome had said. One day he just started feeling the same things he felt for Kikyou…except more so and for Kagome instead. It wasn't as exaggerated as waking up and saying "Oh, I love Kagome!" It progressed more and more after every day he traveled with the girl from the future, learning about her, seeing her differences and abilities, feeling more and more complete every time he saw her and talked with her, held her close onto his back and protecting her.

Actually…he suspected that he always _was_ in love with Kagome. From the very day he met her and began their story together. And if Kikyou hadn't been brought back to life and awakened all those old painful, regretful memories he and Kagome would have probably been already happily mated.

All those times he went off to find Kikyou…it must have really been a sub-conscious need to see if the old feelings were still there, if they could be awakened after those long fifty years. He kissed her…to see if the fire would return…or to somehow free her of the pain he saw in her cold dead eyes, the pain he knew that _he_ had caused. He wanted to know if the feelings were gone…and if so then he could move on.

And also, when he learned of his love for Kagome…he was scared. If he told her that he chose her, if he told her that he loved her and they became…one…………she would forever be in danger. He didn't want her to regret loving him, being with him…somehow getting hurt _because_ of him. He knew with Kagome…if anything happened to her…he would die from the guilt.

That was why he never told her….until he died….that was why he tried to salvage again and again the old love he felt with Kikyou…..

But it was a hopeless cause…more and more his soul went to Kagome, his thoughts and needs, went to the reincarnation from a different time. He felt regret, guilt, pity and sorrow for Kikyou….but he did not love her….at least not anymore…

Kikyou deserved love and acceptance….some kind of peace….but he could not give her that. Unless he killed her….and he knew that was impossible.

He loved Kagome. And when he would come back…he would choose her and love her, live his life with her as long as he could, and though their life would be dangerous…seeing now how she loved him….seeing how everyday life for her now and when he was alive, all the danger she was always in…he knew she would never regret it…and neither would he…..he loved her and always would…

Kagome deserved that from him. For all the pain and unanswered questions he had caused her. For making her think she wasn't good enough, second best. He knew he had hurt her….but he hadn't know it was _this_ bad. _I'm sorry Kagome. I'll make it up to you. _A smile inched across his face.

Oh yes, he would make it up for her.

But Kikyou, poor Kikyou. His smile fell away.…._I'm sorry……I'm so sorry…_

However...he felt _whole_ somehow; as if some pestering need had been answered…at least…a part of it. Deep down, Inuyasha knew that someday he would have to confront Kikyou. That was something he wanted to wait on….for a _very_ long time…but no, it had to be done soon…as soon as he was back to normal. Kikyou deserved that at least….unless she felt no grief from his passing. Perhaps she was content now…or angry beyond belief….but who knew, he sure didn't. He had seen no hint, trail, or scent of Kikyou for weeks now. And that worried him.

But…if he was fated to speak with Kikyou…he would. No matter what, she deserved peace….besides killing him. He would not allow her to do that. No way in hell.

He was going to keep his promise…and be there with Kagome…for the rest of his days.

Peaceful warmth flooded through his body and Inuyasha smiled.

Yeah…everything would work out…somehow.

All the pain that they had gone through…wasn't for nothing. There had to be a happy ending. They deserved that. And even if their lives aren't all that joyful and easy, they would still be together.

And that was all that mattered.

Besides…nothing lasted forever.

And even when the end came…there would be no regrets or fear. For though nothing lasted forever….he knew somehow that this family….this friendship….this everlasting love….would.

And no amount of pain or hardship could break that.

* * *

Kagome sniffed back her tears and continued to stroke her pup's little freshly healed tummy. The hole inside her had widened a bit and the wound was pulsating but looking down on the happy and content face on her former love's reincarnation, the pain wasn't all that bad.

In a way, Yasha looked like he knew something she didn't. And if he could just tell her, she would be gloriously happy.

But that must be just the lack of sleep talking.

Finally becoming aware of her fatigue, Kagome yawned and ruffled Yasha's head. "I think it's time to go to sleep, boy. I'm exhausted now. Come on, we shouldn't have anyone wake up and worry." Stepping out of the water, her body trembled with the night air, and she gladly wrapped herself in one of her special fluffy towels.

Yasha looked at her through sleepy half-lidded eyes as she dried him off and securely wrapped him in the cloth's warmth, hugging him to her now dressed chest. Yawning wider now, her jaw creaking from the stress, Kagome began to walk back to camp, wistfully imagining her sleeping bag…or perhaps soon her wonderful bed back home.

She would have to go back someday; even if she didn't want to. Her Momma must be worried about her and….looking down at the dozing pup in her arms…she needed some healing. _Yasha can help with that. _Kagome smiled and kissed the top of his damp little head. "I love you, Yasha." She looked up to the sky, a scattered array of stars and a bright dappled universe, and a tear glistened down her cheek, "And I love you, my love."

She kept walking.

* * *

Inuyasha slipped in and out of a peaceful darkness, his body heavy and lethargic. His mind numbed to all troubling thoughts and worries, of what would happen in the future. Everything at the moment was right in the world and he glorified in the special treat of not having to be grown up and in charge.

Heaven and hell knew he would have a lot of ground work to take care of once he returned to his old body.

Destroying that bastard Naraku, kissing Kagome, talking to Kikyou, maybe kicking Sesshomaru's or wolf brain's ass jus for fun, kissing Kagome, becoming the pack leader again and spending some quality time with his grieving friends, being a foster dad, kissing Kagome…yeah, he was swamped.

But…Inuyasha stretched and sniffed the air cautiously…all would be we—he sniffed again.

_Holy shit…_he bolted upright, his head peering over Kagome's shoulder and twisting around in every direction, his eyes flicking to every shadow and his ears twitching to every possible noise. _You got to be shitting me! _Inuyasha took one more, huge whiff just to be certain.

Yep.

Death.

_Kikyou…she's nearby. _

"Something wrong boy," Kagome asked. Inuyasha stared at her for a moment and contemplated what he should do.

Stay here and ignore that putrid stench of rotting flesh and clay.

Or check one thing off on his "To Do" list.

Damn, he'd have to be responsible.

Inuyasha gave Kagome a little lick on her cheek_, I'm so sorry, please forgive me,_ and then jumped out of her arms, stumbling a bit on jelly like legs but through pure willpower and adrenaline, sprinted through the trees.

Kagome's screams of his name echoed around him as he dodged and twisted through roots and bushes.

_Damn, what to do? It's not like I can talk to her! But…I've already been proved enough that I don't HAVE to talk. I should just go to her and make sure she doesn't go after Kagome and my Pack. Who the hell knows, she could be here to seek revenge on my friends. _

By that disturbing thought, Inuyasha pumped his poor legs harder.

* * *

There was no meaning.

There never was, if she dared to think about it.

Why was she here?

Why was she still?

The dead were not meant to walk with the living. The dead were not to live again.

And yet here she was, walking through the firmament of time, her putrid rotting scent of death polluting the night air around her.

Forest animals fled from her, knowing of what she was--or was not. Even the mere branches of trees did not scrape against her skin…that fake clay, the outer shell of who she really was.

A lying, murdering and unworthy soul.

She knew she was not to be here; in the living world, of the land of warmth and sunlight.

But yet….she was afraid.

Afraid of death. Of what would happen to her on the other side, of the unknown.

She was too cowardly and pathetic to allow death's claws to grab hold of her.

And so she walked.

To nowhere.

A destination that never existed.

Kikyou stared passively at the grass path in front of her; the sounds of true life mocking her with every step.

It had been only a few days since her discovery.

The valley was still caked with ash and the smell of burnt flesh and decay. The evidence of battle still not yet eroded away by time. So there was still enough of a story left to tell her.

A great tragedy had taken place.

Sometimes her feet lead her places she was not aware of. She didn't bother trying to mark their destination, of where they wanted to go. She just allowed them to walk…and walk…for there was nothing much else to pass her time.

That was how she had discovered the last clue to the puzzle. The last chapter of the story.

Inuyasha was dead.

She had read the tombstone cynically.

**_Our beloved Inuyasha, the bravest of us all. A loyal friend, a loving father and a great leader. May he forever live on in our hearts and finally know peace. We love you, always._**

Time…love….she despised all creatures bounded to time. Her reincarnation, that man….herself.

And she despised love.

She had once believed in it strongly; had been taught that it could move mountains, that it could heal any wound.

Love had betrayed her.

She no longer held love on a pedestal.

She now despised all things.

What a terrible thing she had become.

She had once been a kind, respected priestess. A protector and purifier.

Butnow what?

A liar?

A cheater?

A murderer of young maidens?

She was not worthy to be in the living world. Yet she made no move to try to leave.

There were no tears at that grave. The undead did not cry. And there were really no emotions. Happiness, sadness…all now buried away, the streams all dried up.

But Kikyou did know they were there.

If let free, if with nourishment and the breath of life, the emotions would devour her whole. The grief, the regret, the despair, and anger—she would have died from them.

But they were not alive.

They existed….but not within her.

But within the kindred heart, body and spirit of her reincarnation.

Kagome. A stupid girl, how she despised her as well. She envied that girl, bound to a different time; envied her of the delicate feelings that shone bright like a beacon inside of her.

It was not fair.

And yet she knew it to be.

She was supposed to dead, remember?

And now, her newest dilemma—Inuyasha was dead, never to return, what was she to do with her time now?

There was no way she could get revengeand render him lifeless...if he was already deceased--though she had always known revenge was a pitiful reason to live. But the poor priestess had needed a goal, no matter how stupid of a reason, to make her bleak future seem meaningful--even if it chipped away little by little of who she had once been.

Butnow…that reason was gone, buried beneath where it had all ended---where her life had crumbled to pieces.

Yet, she could hold no anger or hatred toward the Goshinboku Tree.

She did not know the reason for why she could not—but the effect was the same. The tree provided her comfort, peace—an illusion of one anyway.

Even if it was where she and her beloved departed…

Good Lord, what was wrong with her?

She still loved him.

Kikyou's expression, stone-faced and cool, never wavered when she slowed her steps to a stop and leaned her shoulder against the nearest tree.

No one could see the merest hint of the torment waging within her.

Why?

Why did she still hold those cold, lifeless feelings still?

That was the only one she could _almost_ feel---that bitter sweetness, mercurial surge and downpour of love.

It wasn't as strong as when her heart beat and her blood flowed, but it was there….deep…. cold...buried...

Kagome had allowed her to keep those…

Kikyou winced, a raw pain striking where her heart should have been. If she were alive…that pain would have come out as tears…but the dead do not cry, remember?

_I…am…grieving…I think…_The priestess groaned, clutching her chest. _I-it hurts…_

Taking a deep steadying breath, Kikyou straightened, the mask back in place; though her face was drained and her skin taunt across her deathly features.

Soon, she felt strong enough to take a step forward. But her knees wobbled and before she could lose balance, the tree supported her once more.

"D-dammit…" The dead woman closed her eyes, and rested her head backwards. She was spent, there would be no more walking for the time being.

Damn her existence…

* * *

Something was wrong.

Where was that feeling coming from?

She shouldn't be feeling it!

He was gone…dead!

Kikyou's eyes widened and ignoring her "emotional" fatigue, twirled around, searching the valley.

Inuyasha's spirit.

She had felt it…coming towards her.

Was he haunting her now?

Was he her messenger coming to drag her sorry ass to hell?

Kikyou shook her head, and forced her self to think clinically. Her crazy thoughts, so unusual for her, were outspoken and crazy. Inuyasha was dead and up in heaven, never to return as who he had been before. He wasn't here…coming for her...that's insane…

And when that tiny little fluff ball of a puppy ran breathless into the clearing, Kikyou had the strangest urge to laugh.

She _was_ losing it.

But when she turned to walk away, now feeling much energized…the dog barked…and some strange force yanked at her soul.

She stopped…and turned…

The feeling…that pull…it was coming from the dog.

And when Kikyou looked down into those eyes…her very world teetered to the side…

Amber eyes…ears…white hair…the very aura surrounding him…

She turned completely, "Inuyasha?"

He nodded.

Kikyou had then had the strangest urge…to vomit.

* * *

**I don't like this chapter. It didn't turn out the way I wanted it too. And Kikyou is DAMN hard to potray too! Damn, I don't like her. Shit, this left a bad taste in my mouth by reading it. Hope it didn't for you. Everyone had just been hounding me for updates, and it has been two months...just put a smile on and grit your teeth. **

**Plus review. I'm sick of logging on and seeing 120, day after day. I WANT MORE! BWAHAHAHAHA!**

**Buh bye, yech, the next chappie will hopefully be better. **

** LilYasha**


	12. The End of Everlasting Pain

**Finally an update. I am so sorry for the wait. I tried countless times to write this, but time after time my writer's block won. I sure did update THE SILENT HANYOU a lot though. Thank you for sticking with me !**

**And now I apologize because I'm going to make you wait for a long time once again. **

**But believe me when I update again...there will be like FIVE CHAPTERS (hopefully that many) I PROMISE! And Inuyasha would have gotten his body back! So don't fret the wait will be worthwhile! **

**And the only excuse I can give for Inu's slight OOcness (besides the fact that I always make these characters OOc, but no one seems to really flame me for it) is because it's his own personal thoughts. Everyone's true blue side is hidden in their head, well...welcome to Lilyasha's version of what would be happening in Inuyasha's head! Kay? Got it? Good.**

**Also with the SHIT thing...hmm...shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit...lol, okay I'm sorry, I didn't even know I was using it too much. I'll be sure to edit and lower those numbers down.**

**And aBIG thank you straight from my heart to** angel8818 **my beautiful and wonderful FFWAP reviwer for this story...I LOVE YOU! YAY! Without her I never would have gotten the enthusiasm to beat my ass to finish this chapter. THANK YOU! ALL HAIL THE ANGEL! YEAH!**

**THIS IS DEDICATED TO YOU! (If you hate Kikyou, then not this chapter...oh, just pick the chapter that you want to be dedicated to) AGAIN...THANK YOU! **

**WARNING! WARNING! Kikyou is OOC, I repeat Kikyou is OOC! but I don't care, I'm through with her...grumbles...stupid Kikyou...**

* * *

All my love...

**LilYasha

* * *

Always There**

**CH 12**

* * *

She looked about ready to throw up. 

And she looked like shit too.

Little Yasha's chest tightened in pity by her features, stretched and flagged in some places, pale and thin, death was forever knocking at her door.

And she would most likely never answer.

_Kikyou, look what's happened to you…I'm so sorry…_He took a step forward and she nearly flipped.

The _dog_-hanyou soon found himself staring down an arrows' point, gleaming in the moonlight.

His ears filled with the dead maiden's raspy breaths.

Along with his own.

He was no demon boy right now, he probably couldn't dodge it if she ever fired that thing, and if it hit him…well, he would have opened that door.

Again.

_Oh, damn…_Inuyasha gulped and tried to back up. Kikyou practically growled and waved her weapon.

"Don't move dammit! Take one step and I'll shoot! I _won't_ let you take me! Do you hear me? I'm not ready to die!" If it was possible, she paled when he looked up into her ghostly gray eyes.

_What the hell are you talking about? _He lifted his paw and there was that arrow trembling in front of his nose again. _Okay, okay! I won't move, but please be careful with that thing! Sheesh! _

Kikyou was vaguely astonished by the bone cracking fear tumbling in her gut. How strange, even human she never felt such a horrendous wave of it. But just having those cute, and terribly familiar, ears twitch had her nerves on edge. _No, calm down. Take a deep breath. Think rationally. If he is here to take me to hell, it's not like I can kill him. _

Inuyasha blinked, when his past love suddenly lowered her weapon. He held his breath, deciding not to tempt fate, but when she slung her bow over her back and knelt down to his level, he figured it would be okay to move now. Sighing, Inuyasha sat and shone her, his ever so cute puppy grin, the one no one could ignore.

And of course it worked, her face relaxed some and she cocked her head to the side. "I don't know why….but…you're not here to take me to hell are you?"

_Oh, so that's what you were talking about. _Inuyasha snorted, his version of a laugh, and shook his head.

Kikyou gave sigh of relief and tentatively reached out her hand. Inuyasha eagerly stepped forward and pushed his head into her palm, begging for an ear scratch.

_Damn body and its needs. _

His ears twitched by a tiny chuckle. Her thin wiry fingers then slowly twirled and grazed his sensitive appendages.

_Was it just me…or did she just laugh kind of? _Inuyasha shook his head, not really caring at the moment, and rolled over on his back, his legs kicking.

The dead priestess took the hint and began to rub his stomach.

Inuyasha groaned with pleasure.

Kikyou raised a brow. "What has happened to you, Inuyasha? You are dead and now in a dog's body. If you are not here to bring me death…than what is your calling?"

He yawned and lifted his eyelids to look up at her. He was transfixed for a moment by a strange rosy sheen beginning to fill her cheeks.

What the…?

_No, my eyes must be tricking me. Or I'm just really exhausted…_

Now to answer her question…but how? Couldn't talk, remember?

Inuyasha shrugged. Best he could do.

Her eye brows furrowed, "Have you been reincarnated?"

He shook his head.

"Than why are you here? You cannot kill Naraku as a puppy." Her lips twitched and she then realized…she was smiling.

Something was amiss.

Yasha smirked, a great doggy feat, and stood up on his hind legs giving a tiny lick on her chin. _Right now, I guess I'm here to see how you've been. Hello, Kikyou._

Kikyou blinked by his little kiss and couldn't help smiling again. She flicked his ear. "Well, whatever reason. You are quite…cute, Inuyasha."

He barked and wagged his tail, a cocky little flip.

She rolled her eyes.

What was wrong with her? The pain was gone…her chest felt incredibly…light. And all these re-awakening emotions…?

This only happened usually when…

Kikyou narrowed her eyes and stood up, he cradled in her chest. "Your love is coming Inuyasha. The one you have chosen…she must have followed you."

_Kagome? _He reared up and looked all around, sniffing wildly. He was brought back when Kikyou muffled a kiss in his fur.

"I am…jealous of her, Inuyasha. I…I still love you…but I wanted to say…that I understand."

Why was this happening to her---didn't she just say she hated the girl? Dammit, Kagome was coming closer. They were going to seize her. This was her only chance. Redeem herself—for whatever reason—and then get away!

"I had always known…that you two were meant to be. It does fill me with a sense of…well-being I suppose…to know that at least I am a part of her. At least a small portion of me will know the love…that I lost from you…that I betrayed."

The words just kept coming.

* * *

Inuyasha couldn't close his mouth.

_What the hell? What happened to the old Kikyou? First she loved me, hated me, tried to kill me, is scared of me…and is now apologizing? Okay, something's not right!_

**(Yeah, that's me, making her TOO OOC! Damn she's a hard character. I just want to get her over with. So bear with me.)**

His skin tingled when Kagome's special aura made itself known.

Yep, she had followed him.

It wouldn't be good if she found him like this!

Uh oh…

Kikyou opened her eyes and abruptly placed him on the ground. "There is not much time. I must go….but before I do…please forgive me for what I have done…and will soon do."

_What is she talking about? Oh man! She's not planning to kill me is she? Not like this, not now! _Inuyasha paused, horrible imaginings coming to light. _Ah, she must mean Kagome! She's going to kill her! Oh, dammit, no you're not! I won't let you!_ He began to growl, his hair rising, teeth bore.

Kikyou just stared at him with a sad smile and a raised brow. "I am sorry Inuyasha. I hope my magic will not harm you. But I fear this will be our last encounter…I do not want my last memory of you to be in a dog's body…Forgive my actions…past and present…"

With a wave of a hand, a strange tingle swept up his legs and down his spine. For a brief moment, Inuyasha was blind, his eyes sheered by an overwhelming white light, pure and warm. His mind frozen in place, he could not comprehend on why he felt like he was floating…

Was he dying…?

Would he awake in that darkness once more…?

At least…it wasn't as painful…as last time…

But suddenly the brightness dissipated and with a few blinks, he could see clearly again; a high doggy yip escaped his lips.

He was face to face with Kikyou!

He had grown!

It was the attack of dog-zilla!

Inuyasha circled around, fear icing his insides, what had she done?

He had feet!

And hands…_human_ hands!

His red haori, white hair cascading down his shoulders and falling in his eyes…he didn't have a snout anymore!

Holy shit, he had a regular nose! **(Sorry,didn't want toedit that one)**

He whirled around to face his past love, trying to squash the hope rising in his throat, it couldn't be!

_Kikyou, what did you do? How did you—…_

_What the…?_

He had no voice…his words...they came out as barks…what was going on?

He startled him when Kikyou cupped his face with one hand, "It is only an illusion, my love. It is not real. In a moment…it will vanish and you shall be a dog again. I-I could not bear to not see your normal face once more…please forgive me…"

Inuyasha tilted his head and reached out his hand to caress her cheek…he felt nothing…she was right. He stared at his hand, and noticed the ground transparent through the skin…it wasn't real…

His hope died.

He sighed.

He could not feel it when Kikyou ran her fingers through his hair and kissed his temple. She stared into his eyes, "I think she would have made you happy Inuyasha…If you were still alive. I can see now that you two were meant to be…she healed your heart…the one that I broke. I am not sure what God has in store for you, my love…why you are trapped in that new body of yours…but somehow I feel…that death claimed you too early…that you still have so many things in store for you." She lightly kissed his flaccid and unfeeling lips.

"I hope this feeling is right…you deserve to live…" Her words ended in a whisper and she wrapped her arms around him, snuggling her face in his chest. Inuyasha sighed again…and gave a bittersweet smile, closing his eyes.

_You're right about one thing Kikyou…I will be blessed with another try at life…I just hope that I do deserve it…_

The warm glowing face of his one true love filtered into his mind's eyes when that blinding light took him once more.

_Kagome…I hope you will always be in my life…forever on…I love you…_

He didn't shrug off the light doze that took over him.

As he slept…Kagome ran breathlessly into the clearing.

"Y-Yasha! Oh thank you God…" She took a few steps forward, tears of relief welling up in her eyes. She had been so worried. Running off into the forest like that where dozens of dangerous animals and demons live, it had scared her to death! But there he was, napping in…in…

So tangled in her overwhelming feelings, she hadn't even noticed the person standing before her…Kagome stopped and her mouth fell open, "K-Kikyou…"

Yasha was sleeping in Kikyou's arms, snuggled close to her chest.

It was a little disconcerting.

Her shock worn off and Kagome went into a battle ready position, "What did you do to him, Kikyou? You put him down!"

Irritation flashed in the dead woman's eyes, "I have not harmed your precious dog. I found him in the forest. He was exhausted. He has been sleeping ever since." She turned to her reincarnation, her lips puckered in anger. "Be at ease, _Kagome_. I have no wish to battle with you this night."

Kagome bit her lip and slowly lowered her cocked bow and arrow. "Why are you here, Kikyou?"

She stiffened when the perished priestess walked towards her. "I am walking, young one. Thereare notmany things I can do in this world. Here…" Kikyou handed over the sleeping _Inu-_Yasha.

Kagome looked down into drooped amber eyes. "Oh, Yasha, you scared the hell out of me. Don't do that again, okay?"

He nodded with a yawn and made himself comfortable in her arms, succumbing to slumber.

Kagome sighed and kissed his forehead. She then looked up at her past life, anxiety wiggling in her gut. That always happened whenever she was in Kikyou's presence. "Well…um…I guess…thank you. For, you know, keeping him safe."

She was surprised when the older woman smiled. "You care for him very much don't you?"

"Yeah…yeah I do…" Kagome hugged the pup closer.

There was a pause. The two versions of one soul stared down at the slumbering dog.

Suddenly Kikyou spoke, calm and a little choked. "I…I am sorry for your loss…"

Kagome's head flew up, her eyes wide. She licked her dry lips, "Wha-what do you…"

Her incarnate's eyes were incredibly sad, pitying…and almost pleading, "I know what happened…what Naraku has done…how Inuyasha left this world."

She thought she was used to it, that she had passed that hurtle, but by just having Kikyou acknowledge it…the lump was reborn, salt stinging her brown orbs, "He uh….d-died…saving us…"

Kikyou nodded and put a hand on her shoulder, "I know your pain young one…I can feel it as plain as day…" She moved her hand to her heart, her throat bobbing. "I should go…"

"Why…where do you need to go Kikyou? I have to talk to you…I-Inuyasha…wanted me to talk to you…" Kagome stepped forward, her knees shaking, emotion clogging the back of her mouth.

She seemed surprise, "H-he….did…?"

Kagome nodded.

"But I can't….I can't…if I stay…" She trailed off.

Her reincarnation felt a crackling irritation, Kikyou was acting strange. It was starting to piss her off. "Stop talking in riddles. I'm not going to let you leave…okay? I'm not…going to be afraid of you…We have to talk…that's the last thing I need to do…the last thing Inuyasha wanted me to do…" Kagome grabbed her arm, tugging at the thick red cloth. "Please…just….talk to me…"

Kikyou tried to snap the mask back in place, her indifference, anger…but it wouldn't come…Kagome's soul was tugging at her own. And the link they shared, rekindled her frozen emotions.

She wanted to cry.

And most of all…she wanted company…being dead was a lonely business.

But she couldn't stay.

"N-no…."

Kagome did a good impression of a growl. "Yes."

Kikyou stared at her, and back down to the reborn soul of Inuyasha…she coughed and swallowed back the tears. "N-no…I can't…"

"Why not? Inuyasha asked me on his death bed to help you…help you find peace…I'm going to keep my promise, dammit!"

"But what if I don't want to find peace! Who would want to die? I don't need your help!" Kikyou seethed and struggled for breath, her icy heart causing her slight pain by its hurried throb.

Kagome's eyes lit up with sudden understanding, "You're…afraid…aren't you? Afraid to die…"

"Of course I am! Who wouldn't be?" She sniffed and slid to her knees, Kagome followed not yet releasing her hand clinging to the older woman's kimono.

The girl from the future placed down little Yasha and used her free hand to lift Kikyou's chin, meeting her glassy gaze. "I know Kikyou…I can feel it…through our bond…I know what you're feeling…I know that feeling all these emotions must trouble you…hurt you even…I'm sorry for that…"

"No don't be…don't be sorry…who knows what I would become…without this torment…"

Kagome felt no discomfort by the bloody tears trailing from Kikyou's eyes. Instead she hugged the distraught woman, patting her back. "You miss him don't you…you….you still love him…"

Kikyou gave a long suffering sigh, "Yes I do…but I have let him go…"

Kagome's eyes widened, "What?"

The dead priestess looked up and smiled, "I have let him go young one…he has chosen you…something I knew, deep in my heart, would happen…I have set him free…"

Kagome shuddered by the onslaught of tears wracking her form, "But he's gone! Dammit, you're too late! He's…he's gone…and he's never coming back…at least…not as he once was…oh, Inuyasha…"

Kikyou didn't know what controlled her to hold the sobbing girl; she was supposed to hate her. But yet…she could not find that anger. She was bonded to this young woman and right now, all she could feel…was rising sadness. And there was also a faint distinction of another emotion…something she had only felt when spending time with her younger sister Kaede…it was something she could not name…was almost afraid to…but it filled her heart with a small flicker of warmth.

She rubbed the girl's back and shushed in her ear, "Do not dwell in your grief any long, young one. You know he is always with you. And he will always love you…shush now…it will be alright. You shall see him again…that I am sure of…"

Kagome raised her head and wiped her eyes, "I wish I…was like you, Kikyou…I've always…"

She was surprised by the anger that admittancebrought. "Do not say such things! How dare you even utter those words! We are linked in many ways than one but never try to change who you really are, never damn yourself like that. My life has forever been in turmoil and pain; you do not wish to have that do you?" Kikyou grounded her teeth, vaguely shocked by the words that had left her mouth.

"But you're so good at fighting and staying calm, dammit, I can't even make a force field yet!"

"You must practice then! You have the same power as me Kagome; you must only learn to harness it. Besides…why be me...ever since I have met you…I have wanted to be you…"

"What! Why?"

"It should be simple to see, you can show emotion so easily. You trust others effortlessly and you have been able to do something I could never do…heal his heart…there are many things about you that has me to sin, that makes me feel…jealous…your heart and soul is so pure…mine is not…"

Kagome shook her head and straightened, "How can you say that? You have helped the sick, protected the innocent, and even gave your life to save everyone. How can you say that you're evil? That's not true!"

"You are so naïve and innocent" Kikyou smiled, "look at me Child…I am one of the dead…and for my sins…I deserve to be damned…"

"No you don't. I don't think you have left God's eyes or his heart…you're not lost yet, Kikyou. You've just made mistakes…but God knows we all do. Don't give up yet."

Kikyou's smile fell and she stared in wonder at her reincarnation; all that she had lost, all that she had done, what she had wrongly accused…and yet, this girl did not hold hatred for her.

"I can see now why he chose you…you are special young one. I believe you will change the world." Kikyou sniffed, "I must go…but before I do, please forgive me for the torture and pain I have brought you."

The young girl shook her head and Kikyou held up her hand. "No, do not say anything. Just please accept my heart felt apologies. And also keep my words close to you…never fall into the darkness, like I have. You will see tragedies…and the horrors of the world…but please…never let it harden your heart. Stay strong...and remember when trapped in doubt…your love will always be with you. You are bound by souls after all. Death cannot keep you apart."

Kagome's lower lip trembled and with a glorious smile, she leaped forward and squeezed the older woman. "Oh, Kikyou…I will pray for you. That God will grant you mercy and happiness…I know you deserve that."

Kikyou chuckled and stood up. "Yes well…I shall find redemption before then…make up for my sins, or I could not accept that." She wiped a stray tear from Kagome's cheek, "Be well Kagome…enjoy your life while it blesses you so…and…thank you…"

Kagome smiled and opened her mouth to say something but Kikyou's special dragons came out of nowhere and wrapped around the older woman's form. They spun faster and faster, and soon with a dazzling array of what looked like stars…Kikyou disappeared.

The young girl looked at the spot where she had once been and held up a hand to caress the jewel shards hung around her neck. Their power buzzed in her fingers, casting warmth down her arm, Kagome smiled. "No…thank you, Kikyou." She whispered into the night.

A soft wind caressing her cheek was her only answer.

* * *

**DONE! NO MORE KIKYOU! Told you it was OOC.**

* * *

He had not been able to sleep.

Ever since the snapping of a twig when Kagome left to bathe, fatigue could not ensnare him.

And so he sat, staring sightlessly into a rekindled fire, his mind buzzing a mile a minute.

He had not been able to put the thought to rest.

It was absurd really.

Ridiculous, illogical!

There was no way in hell.

But he could not cast the notion aside.

Miroku sighed and rubbed his temple, wariness setting in.

A rustle in the brush.

He straightened, hand at his staff, ready for battle.

Yasha stumbled into the camp.

The monk slumped in relief and rested his chin in his hand, watching with slight amusement when the pup lazily dragged his sleepy body over to him.

"Well I see now you are all clean…did you have fun…"--it was impractical, insane…he said it anyway—"_Inuyasha…"_

The dog jumped, ears alert, eyes wide, mouth unhinged. The poor thing looked about ready to pass out from shock.

Miroku furrowed his brows and smirked. That was quite entertaining, well worth questioning his sanity, say the least.

* * *

Inuyasha forgot to breathe. 

_Oh damn…he figured it out…someone figured it out! **Finally!**_

Grief really did mess you up. The hanyou thought for sure someone would have figured it out a long time ago, it wasn't excruciatingly difficult. He dies…a dog comes…looks the same…acts the same (besides licking and barking)…and hell, even has the same name practically!

Give them props for the whole aura and the same tasting blood and the S-I-T thing, but besides that…Inuyasha had been slightly disappointed.

But now someone finally decided to use their brain! Hallelujah! Thank you, Miroku!

What to do now?

Yasha gulped and sat down.

Miroku tilted his head. "It is you…isn't it?"

He nodded.

He noticed a tiny tremble go down the monk's spine, there was a flash of hope and hesitance in his violet-blue eyes. Miroku lifted his head and swallowed, "I-it…really is? You…kept your promise…?"

Inuyasha smiled and nodded once more.

Now Miroku looked like he was going to pass out.

He had liked the idea of being right…but now that apparently he was…Miroku found that it was kind of hard to think rationally. His mouth went dry and his stomach did a strange flip flop.

"Oh…shit…" was all he could manage to choke out. **(okay, okay. I know, another one)**

The hanyou's doggy grin faded and he worriedly trotted over and licked the stunned man's hand, still wrapped in bandages. _Miroku? Are you okay? Come on, dammit, talk to me, you should be proud. You figured it out!_

Miroku shook his head, stunned again by the rock in his throat. He tried to clear it, "Y-you're not…a reincarnation…you're actually…"

Yasha nodded his head and pawed at the rosary draped onto his furry chest.

The monk reached out with quivering fingers and caressed one of the fangs, "I knew it…I knew it…but I…I couldn't believe it…oh, damn…y-you really did keep your promise…"

Inuyasha snorted. _Of course I did, baka. Who do you take me for?_

His ears twitched when a bizarre chuckle fell from the man's lips. Miroku wiped his eyes and muffled his bubbling laugh. "Oh my God…thank you…Oh thank you. It is so good to see you my friend!" He suddenly grabbed the puppy and hugged him, burying his face in his fur.

The hanyou blinked, concern twisting at his tummy. He twisted around and licked the human's face, eyes widening by the taste of salt. _Miroku? Oh come on! What is it with you humans, even good news makes you cry! Come on, please stop it, I can't deal with this right now. I'm too tired…_

And pretty soon, Miroku did somber. He laid Inuyasha on his lap and began to rub his stomach. The pup looked up at his face, noticing a smile on his lips….but a small sadness in his eyes. _I know what you're thinking…you're happy I'm here…but you want the old me…not the puppy version…_Yasha sighed and closed his eyes.

This was too much for him right now.

_I'll deal with this later. I'm going to bed. _

And with that, he determinedly let free all thoughts and sunk into a heavy slumber.

And once again, Kagome came in when he was already long gone.

Miroku looked up and smiled at the girl. "You are looking radiant this evening, Miss Kagome. I can see that the bath did you some good."

She beamed at him, "I _feel_ wonderful, Miroku. Even if that silly puppy ran off again and was making me worry…" Kagome laughed and sat on her sleeping bag. "Thank goodness he came back here though. I wouldn't want to have to comb the whole forest."

The monk nodded and looked down at the sleeping pup. _Should I tell her…no...perhaps I should wait…I could freshen the pain…_he smiled and trailed his hand up to those strikingly familiar ears, scratching them gently. Yasha twitched and sighed.

"I'm going back to my time tomorrow."

Miroku looked up in surprise by the miko's soft words. "What? Why? I thought you—"

Kagome stared at Inuyasha and sighed, "I'm running away, I can see that now. Besides we need supplies and…."

"And you think Yasha can heal your family…"

She nodded, "Like he healed us…they need him….Momma especially…"

Miroku watched her and paused before speaking, "She needs you too, Kagome. She must be worried about you."

Kagome wiped her eyes and nodded. "I know…that's another reason why I want to go…also, I think Yasha could use the rest. There's no danger of another demon attack in my time."

Miroku hesitated before uttering, "What if he can't go through..."

"He will. I know he will..."

The monk smiled and agreed. "Okay...you can use Kirara tomorrow. We'll head back to the village."

"We didn't really get much done did we?"

"No…but we'll get back in stride sooner or later. We're just not ready yet…"

The pains not gone yet.

Miroku hung his head and silence shrouded the camp. Soon Kagome lied down and fell asleep. The young man stayed awake long after the sun kissed the world with its warmth.

As the morning ray's caused Yasha's hair to glisten and sparkle, Miroku continued to scratch his ears and rub his tummy.

_It is truly good to see you my friend…but I do not believe that you can fully get rid of the pain…_

_No_…with a heavy heart, the young monk sighed…_it may never leave_.

* * *

**YES IT WILL! HAHA! **

**Anywhoo, a small reminder...I WILL GLADLY READ ANY STORIES! My email is listed, feel free to send a manuscript or a link to it, whatever. DON'T BE SHY! **

**And I MIGHT be nice...maybe...BWAHAHAH!**

**Lol. **

**LATER! **

**LilYasha **


	13. The Time is Near

**Just to let you guys know, I know all about Buddah and what the Japanese believe in about heaven and death. It's just, I don't know _enough_, and with just researching books and the interent, my writing about it would be sketchy and...well...I wouldn't sound like I know what I'm talking about. **

Besides, I didn't know when I started writing this that I would make such a big referance to God. But now that i am, I like it. I'm Christian, a believer, and felt more comfortable writing this story _this_ way.

**My apologies to those who don't like it. DEAL WITH IT!**

**AndI think shit would be Inuaysha's holy word too, I'm glad at least some people didn't mind my over use of the word. That's good! **

**Also, funny note: This was 16 pages in word. Someone asked in one of my fics how long my chaps are. Around there, is my average. **

* * *

Changed my mind by the way, here's the next chapppie!

**

* * *

Always There**

**Ch 13**

* * *

It was a mouth. 

Hungry….an endless pit…ready to gobble her whole…

She had used to find it comforting, maybe a little annoying, it had changed her life after all.

But today, with the sun watching her, her shirt sticky with sweat, back aching with her back pack, and her arms full of her precious love…it was terrifying.

Maybe this wasn't a good idea.

Kagome took a step back from the Bone Eater's Well and mulled over her options.

She really didn't have to go.

No one was making her.

_I bet Momma and everyone are just fine…_

"_My baby is dead! My poor baby!"_

"_He can't be dead…big brother is so strong and brave…no one could kill my hero…NO!"_

The miko pushed the thoughts back and took a deep breath. It was decided, they had to go.

"Well, Yasha, we're going home…"

The pup's only response was a yawn. Kagome bit her lip. He had been sleeping the whole journey here. She hoped he wasn't sick…by the crashing notion, her insides turned cold.

What if he were to…

_No, he's fine. He's just tired from that demon attack the other day, that's all. There's nothing wrong. _

She was still worried.

Kagome kissed his furry little head and soaked in his warmth. If he were to get sick, than she could easily take him to the vet, no problem.

She smiled amusedly; he would definitely not like the vet that was certain.

That is…if he was able to go through the well at all…

No, that was stupid. There was nothing to fret about. Kagome knew deep in her heart, that Yasha would be able to pass through, hands down.

_God, stop making excuses. Let's get this over with…_

Another deep, fortifying breath: _Okay, going home…_Kagome looked back to the village and memorized the valley before her. _I just hope I'm coming back here…_

Stepping atop the well's rim, wobbling from the weight strapped to her back, Kagome stared into the gaping hole…and without a second thought…jumped in.

Weightlessness took her and before she knew it, there was refreshing shade from the well house of her time. And Yasha was still napping in her arms.

Kagome smiled, "You see, girl, nothing to worry about…"

_Except Momma…_

Her smile faded.

There was still time, no one knew she was back yet. She could just pretend this never happened, that she had never had this stupid forsaken idea to head back home, she could go back and make an excuse like the well didn't work anymore. Yeah…that way she never would have to come back here and face her grieving family. Never!

And!--that would never work…

The girl sighed and started on her perilous journey up the ladder and into the present. Her home, her birthplace…a place that she had not missed during the weeks she had been gone…

On the contrary, when Kagome relieved herself of her possessions (except Yasha of course) and turned back to the portal. She felt a waving crash of homesickness…for a place she didn't even belong to…

A perplexing dilemma, what were she to do once the jewel was fixed and Naraku was defeated? She had already decided, in the lowest regions of her soul, that she wanted to stay in the past, the place where her _love_ was born. But she also knew…that that could never come to be…there was no way God would permit that. She could do horrible damage to the time line…besides as well as never seeing her family or friends again…

What if someone were to ask her mother where she had gone. She couldn't answer, '_Oh, my daughter doesn't exist in this time zone anymore. Oh no, she decided to stay in the past and betray her family.'_

Oh man, what was she going to do?

Would the jewel grant her wish…a wish she had never drip from her lips…a wish that she had kept secret for what felt like an eternity?

Or would it dispel her and think of a new fate?

What if it decided…to redo the whole thing…to have her wake up and live a life…where she never met Inuyasha or her feudal time friends…what if…

It made her forget?

Kagome coughed back tears and her quivering fear.

What would come would come.

She could not control fate or destiny.

It was in God's hands.

Kagome hung her head and turned toward the small hut's sliding door, she walked out into pollution and gangs, drugs and war…and grief…a world that had lost touch with the finer things in life…and instead chose money and power…and greed…

It was home.

Her real home.

_But it doesn't feel like it anymore. _

Hugging her puppy tight, feeling strength from his heartbeat, she drug her feet to the back door of her child hood house.

It was deadly silent when she allowed herself inside.

"Mo…" she cleared her dry throat and spoke louder, "Momma? Are you here? It's me…Kagome…"

Her ear drums pounded, her heart sailed with every creak and groan of her steps, the house remained cold…unwelcoming…

She shivered from the kitchen tiles and noticed dirty dishes in the sink. There was still life within these walls…

But they were not here right now.

At the front door, their shoes were missing. An empty coat rack hung by the door.

"They must have gone out…" her voice sounded strangely out of place and eerie, Kagome gulped.

_I don't want to stay here…I want to go back…_

She swallowed her rising panic and squared her shoulders, "No, I am _not_ leaving. I am _not_ going to run away again."

_But just to make me feel better, let's go to the Goshinboku Tree. _

Yeah, good idea.

Kagome sprinted to the yard.

* * *

As she neared the one place that filled her with freezing warmth, the miko's ears filled with the sudden sound of humming. Cocking her head, she hugged her back to the corner of her house and peered around…her lips parted…

Her family…

Her mother, Souta and Grandpa, all huddled beneath the massive tree's branches, heads bowed, hands clasped…

Candles and flower petals scattered around them.

They were praying.

Kagome noticed something leaning against the tree before them. She strained with all her might, leaning as far as she could go without giving herself away…and a few moments later…after knowing what the object was…Kagome's knees buckled and she slid to the ground.

A picture…

Tears fell to the grass below.

Her present…

Her chest bobbed and little whimpers escaped her trembling lips.

The little leather wallet she had given to Inuyasha on his birthday. The one with different photos in it of all the members of their pack…that was where it had gone off to…**(Read the one shot INNOCENSE, if you wish to know more)**

Even with the glare of the sun, Kagome could see clearly which picture her family was praying to…

The one of Inuyasha and herself. It glowed in her mind's eyes, her behind him, chin resting on his shoulder, and him…a blush on his cheeks…

She had surprised him with that picture.

"_Please, Inuyasha? Just one, itty bitty picture. It won't kill ya! Please!" _

She remembered the sultry pout she had given him and the defeat in his eyes.

"_Ugh, fine, dammit. Are you happy now?"_

She had leapt at him, twisting him around and holding the camera as far out as she could get in front of them.

"_Yes, I am **very** happy..."—_she'd whispered in his ear—"_Say cheese!"_

Kagome chuckled, wiping her eyes and holding back a sob, by the memory of the argument afterwards.

Those stupid petty arguments…

God, she missed them!

Her heart heaving painfully, Kagome leapt to her feet and ran down to her family, tears blurring her vision, "Momma! Momma!" What a _bitch_ she had been. Leaving in the middle of the night, leaving them to worry and grieve alone…

Inuaysha would have hated her for this!

She could just hear him yell at her now…

_Oh, love…forgive me…_

Her mother jumped, twisting around, "Kagome!" She cried. She stumbled to meet her, her own tears staining her muddy cheeks. "You're alive! Oh thank god, my baby girl is alive!"

Kagome fell to her knees, her mother joining and wrapping her in a crunching hug. "Oh, Momma, I'm so sorry! But I was afraid…I was so afraid that you wouldn't let me go back! I couldn't stand that…I couldn't! Momma, I'm so sorry, please forgive me!"

"Its okay, baby, I forgive you, I'm so happy you're alive! I forgive you, shhh….oh, Kagome. My sweet, sweet Kagome, I prayed every night that God would keep you safe, that you would come back to me. And now here you are! Thank God! My sweet baby girl…thank you God," She petted her hair, raining kisses on her cheeks and forehead. "My little girl…"

In the confusion, Gramps and Souta were left to watch, crying silently.

No one noticed the bedraggled puppy trying to free himself from the women's maniac hold.

* * *

Okay, now it was getting hard to breathe.

Yasha gasped and kicked his legs. _Hello, poor little defenseless puppy here! I'm happy to know you've all been reunited and that all's been forgiven…but could you give a guy some breathing room, please! _Their hug wound tighter. _Ah, Kagome!_

The girl jumped and released her mother, "Oh, Y-Yasha, I'm so sorry. I-I forgot I was still holding you." She picked up the panting pup and scratched his ears.

Inuyasha sighed, _Thank you…_

Mrs. Higurashi sniffed and wiped her eyes, "Who's this cute little guy, Kagome."

Kagome smiled, "This is Yasha. I found him…um…a few weeks ago…"

Yasha yipped and turned to the older woman, _Hey, Mrs. H! _

A gasp, "K-Kagome…h-he…"

Fresh tears.

A quivering of lips, "I know" a deep breath, "I actually found him…a-after the funeral…w….we think he's Inuyasha's reincarnation…"

Mrs. Higurashi clasped her hands together and held them to her chin, "My Lord…I…I can see the resemblance…but…how can you be certain?" She hesitantly reached out and petted Yasha's head. Inuyasha grinned and twitched his ears for attention.

"We can't be…but…he acts like him…looks like him…and…Momma…the rosary even _works_ on him…"

Her mother looked up at her, her mouth parted, "So when you say sit…"

Kagome nodded.

"Oh my Lord…how you twist our lives…" Mrs. Higurashi took a deep breath, steadying herself and held out her arms, earnest in her glassy eyes, "C-Can I hold him?"

Kagome smiled.

Inuyasha leaped.

_It's so good to see you, Mrs. H! I thought Kagome would **never** go through the well **again**…why couldn't she have done that when I was **alive**? _Yasha licked the older woman's glossy wet cheeks and barked happily. _Figures…stupid wench…_

Mrs. H. smiled, and hugged the hanyou, her throat bobbing. She caressed her daughter's cheek, "Come, let us go inside. We have much to talk about…I'll make some tea…"

The miko nodded, a slight apprehension teasing her insides.

She stood up…and was soon attacked by the other members in her small family, whom had grown sick of being left out.

Kagome giggled and cried, hugging them all.

_I guess it's good to be home…_

* * *

Once the whole excitement was over and his adrenaline boost had fled from his body, his weariness and listlessness returned. Inuyasha hadn't left Mrs. Higurashi's hold, not even when she began making tea one handed.

His instincts had told him to not to leave her just yet.

And besides, she wasn't too keen on putting him down anyway.

He dazedly watched as she lifted the steaming mug, the spicy-sweet brew teasing the inside of his nose, and walked over to the kitchen table. Kagome gave him a concerned smile when he yawned but looked up at her mother when she spoke. Souta and Gramps listened in eagerly with their own drinks.

"And he's alive? How big was the demon?" The older woman sat down and unconsciously began rubbing Inuyasha's head, reassuring herself he was fine and well.

For some reason they were speaking about the demon attack three days ago, the one where he had been close to opening the door once again.

Kagome's eyes widened with her storytelling, "It was huge! It had long fangs and claws, as long as a baseball bat, and sharp as a sword. And it smelled awful, even worse than the city dump. It was trying to get the jewel shards, like always—"

Inuyasha chuckled by the way she rolled her eyes. He was still not quite used to the idea of her family knowing everything that went down in his time: the demons, the danger. He wasn't sure if he liked it. But it meant he didn't have to lie to her mother anymore.

Thank goodness.

Another mind numbing yawn took hold of him and he struggled to open his eyes when it ended.

There was something wrong about this.

For the past few days, he had been in a fog. His brain was muddled and his body weak, he could hardly stand for more than a couple of minutes. And when he finally did collapse, his legs would shake and tremble. He would find himself totally concentrated on his surrounding, on conversations, and then would wake up. Not even realizing that he had fallen asleep.

It wasn't normal. And there was no way that it was good.

He was completely healed, even if he wasn't a demon at the moment, there was no reason for him to be so lazy and exhausted…no reason at all! What was wrong with him?

His thoughts grew fuzzy and everyone's voices turned distant and slow……black ensued….

_**The time is near.**_

Inuyasha jostled awake, panting and suddenly very, very cold. He shivered uncontrollably, snuggling into Mrs. Higurashi's warmth, whoever had been speaking broke off and he could feel everyone's eyes resting on him.

He didn't care.

He was so cold…_so cold_…

"Yasha? Are you alright?" He could hear Kagome stand up and walking over to him. Her Mother's hand flitted over his stomach and head, two arms now tightened around him, trying to give him comfort and heat. He didn't know whose arms they belonged to.

He breathed through his mouth, teeth chattering, blowing onto his paws, rubbing his snout and ears. He was so damn cold!

Ugh, he knew he wasn't right!

But somehow, he felt no sickness. He was absolutely certain that he wasn't ill.

But what other reason could be given.

Had he been poisoned?

_Kagome…_

"Shhhh, Yasha, its okay. We're going to get you some blankets, don't worry. We'll get you warmed up." He was in her arms. That was good…he liked being held by her the most…

The cold was leaving…and in it's place…

Right when she had walked into the living room, heading for the couch where a good snuggly blanket lied, Yasha suddenly jumped up with a yip. His eyes were wide and he kicked at her in panic, tongue flopping out of his mouth. Finally he fell from her arms, landing with a smack and flop on the carpet.

She called his name, kneeling down to grab him, he ran.

Through the kitchen, and out the back door, left open for clean night air to filter through. They had been talking for at least an hour, and she had gone though the well pretty late in the afternoon. The sun was just setting, darkness blanketed the lawn, and a refreshing breeze had kicked up.

It felt so damn good when he made it outside.

Inuyasha groaned, his legs already starting to tingle from his out-of-the-blue burst of energy. He plopped to his behind and turned to the breeze, drinking it up, feeling that unnatural fever begin to ebb away.

Once the cold had diminished, a burning fire deep in his gut had lashed out through his veins, licking and engulfing him in a matter of seconds.

It had frightened him, how quickly the pain ate him. And all he could think, in the white blinding terror, was he needed water. Water, water, water, need water…he ran in a blur, and soon found relief once he mistakenly found the opened door.

Thank goodness.

In a huff, the burning ended and he allowed gravity to take hold. He swayed, wobbled, and dropped. A hand was there to catch him.

Inuyasha was already unconscious before he could learn that Grandpa Higurashi had been his rescuer.

* * *

**Warning, Gramps might be considered OOC. You don't see enough of him, to know. Sorry. **

* * *

He had allowed no one to see his inner pain.

Perhaps he had been afraid of pity, thought that was ridiculous since he was not the only one with a broken heart. Maybe instead, he had been afraid of some arrogant reply, a know it all remark, _I knew that he cared. _

Whichever reason, he had locked it inside.

Tears were a given, he had sobbed long into the night, with no one to hear. He had learned from years before that grief was stronger than pride.

Love was as well.

So he had prayed along with his family. Being there for them, while unleashing his own hurt to God.

He was guilty, he felt regret, he longed for a way to go back in time, so that he could slap his bigheaded and chauvinistic self. He had always tried to teach his children and grandchildren to not judge people for what they looked like or who their family was.

And yet he had been unkind to that demon boy.

But he didn't just cry because of self-hatred of past words and actions, he cried for the shattered heart of his grandchild.

Kagome, she had loved that impolite little demon brat.

And it destroyed him to watch her impassive, cold eyes when she relayed Inuyasha's death to him and the family. How uncaring she looked when Souta and Ayumi sobbed and wailed before her.

Yes, he cried for regret on being rude to that boy (though he did his share of rudeness as well), but also for doing his part to try to keep him and his granddaughter separated.

It had appalled him then, to even think of them together, being married, bearing children…perhaps…leaving…taking his Kagome away forever.

So he had done all that he could do, talking to the girl, begging her to let him seal the well, and not hiding his hatred for that Inuyasha when he came to call and drag her back in time.

He had been filled with a grievous horror, to slowly see Kagome fall in love with the hanyou boy.

But now that Inuyasha was gone, and Kagome's heart was broken. He realized his terrible work. He had thought it had been for the best of his grandchild, but now he knew…Inuyasha and Kagome had been _best_…for one another. He felt it just for him to wear the weight of shame and regret upon his hunched, knurly shoulders.

And when that morning came, when she was not in her bed, a lonely note bearing _I'm sorry, _was found on her pillow. He knew that he was part of the blame.

Another reason why he had cried, had kept the pain inside, and had prayed every day before the Goshinboku Tree.

And one of his pleas had come true.

Kagome was home.

He could see that a terrible burden had been lifted from her shoulders, though she had wept within his daughter-in-law's arms, he could tell there was brightness to her eyes, a glow to her cheeks…

But yet, the pain was still there.

When his wife had been taken from him, stricken with cancer, it had been a living hell. A part of him ripped away forever, an empty place within his heart that could never be filled.

The pain never lessens.

But it dulls.

He knew that the dulling process for his young granddaughter was beginning.

At least she was home. But not to stay, in the weeks of torturously reminiscing and thinking, contemplating and planning. He had accepted that. Kagome had a purpose, a destiny to be fulfilled. He would let her leave. To go back to that secret mysterious place, only she could return to.

He knew her mother had come to the same conclusion as well.

_My darling Kagome--_"Grandpa?"--_you are so young…but have already felt so much pain…_"Grandpa!"—_I pray happiness will come to you soon…_

"Grandpa!"

Old man Higurashi jumped from his long, dragged out reverie (much like his stories) by Kagome's frustrated shouts.

He turned to her, meeting her concerned filled gaze. Tears had already leaked from the corners, her lips were stretched and thin, "Is he okay, Grandpa?"

He blinked. Oh, of course, the young reincarnated puppy! He had carried the poor sleeping thing up to his room to check him out. That's right.

His smile to his granddaughter was sheepish, "Oh, yes, I am sorry, Kagome. But I've looked him over; there is nothing wrong with him. I believe that he is just suffering from that demon attack you were telling us about earlier. Some doggy version of P.T.S.D."

A stupid conclusion. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, it was a diagnosis he didn't believe for an instant. Shivering so sporadically and then panting from fever, and then passing out. It was something he had never heard of before. Ever since his retirement, Higurashi Senior took the time to learn strange things, it was better than aging faster with boredom; and in all the veterinarian clinics he had been in, books he'd read, shows he'd seen, there was no such doggy illness containing those symptoms.

And no such thing as doggy P.T.S.D.

Unless there were doggy shrinks out in the world.

Well, he had witnessed stranger things in his long life.

From the look on Kagome's face, he knew she didn't believe it either.

Gramps looked down at the little pup slumbering on his lap, and was struck once again with his appearance. Believing in legends, and unnatural, unworldly phenomenon, the old man didn't doubt for an instant that this was some version of Inuyasha's soul.

Now for the reason on how and why the boy got reborn so quickly and was staying with Kagome, was beyond him. That was heaven's jurisdiction.

He was just thankful that it had been done.

_It was because of you, that Kagome was able to come home. That I am certain…you are healing her heart…_

Who else better to heal her heart than the soul of the boy who had stolen it?

Fate could get really confusing sometimes.

Grandpa H. stood up, cradling the hanyou pup close, and felt a bizarre release in his chest, like something wound so tight and pulsating with pain had just been lessened.

Kagome had told them stories on how Yasha had been helping her and her friends.

To feel it for himself, the old man had to give the dog some credit, even asleep he had healing powers.

"Are you sure he's okay, Grandpa?" He stared down at his grandson, another reason for weeping on those cold, dark nights. Hopefully, Yasha could heal Souta, before his bruised innocent heart was shattered. Life had a way of doing that.

"Yes, my boy, he just needs his rest. We all do, come along." With worried glances, he pushed the family out his bedroom door. Once Ayumi and Souta left, Gramps grabbed Kagome's arm. "I wish to speak with you, Kagome."

She looked at him, knowing there was important news he had to tell her.

He paused before whispering, "Something is gravely wrong with your dog, Kagome. I don't know what plagues him or if it is threatening. But I do know that it is something no vet can treat. It has been short and I have missed you terribly, but I think you should both go back through the well tomorrow."

Kagome's eyes widened, "What?"

"You heard me child. I have some strange feeling that a more…oh, I cannot explain it, …some _unforeseen_ culprit is causing this. Your Kaede could aid in helping find the cure."

She had never seen her Grandpa so serious, he was a good actor and had pretended before during his crazy stories, but this time, in his hard eyes…she knew this was no game. "Grandpa—" he was acting so strangely, out of character, --"it can't be that bad. I told you how he healed from that demon attack, what if it's…Inuyasha's blood…or…"

Her grandfather shook his head, "You don't believe that. His symptoms are not serious now…but I fear his condition can take a drastic turn. You said before he was a very energetic thing…this is not normal."

He was sick. Yasha was sick. Her fears were confirmed.

"We'll leave after breakfast."

She was pulled into a fierce hug, "Please come back quickly." He whispered in her ear.

The dog was important, that he knew deeply, if anything happened to Yasha, Kagome would be devastated…crumbled…lost forever. Nothing could fix her then.

No one would like it, but her visit would have to be cut short.

At the even briefest thought on Yasha…giving in to illness…like his wife had…the knot inside him, re-twisted, fresh with pain.

It was hard not to take a liking to the dog so quickly.

_I just hope…that this **unforeseen** **culprit**…is not sinister…_

* * *

He knew he was dreaming.

It couldn't be real.

Even if it felt like it.

In his dream, it was the dead of night, the house was asleep, he was lying on Kagome's bed…writhing in pain.

Cold flames stretched his ligaments and tendons, his eyes were rolling in his head, his paws were twitching out of control.

Then it stopped.

He was left with a pounding head ache.

For some reason, he stands up, feels taller…wavers in and out of blackness…he's cold…yet covered in sweat….he needs water…so thirsty…

He keeps his balance well when he walks out to the hallway to the bathroom.

The world twists and dips, like walking on a bridge, toppling close to the edge…but no…he doesn't fall…

He's able to open the door.

He thinks foggily about how he can reach the door handle…but doesn't ponder on it long, his throat is dry and cracked; his need for water is growing desperate.

The bathroom tiles are cold beneath his paws…or…wait…feet? Looking down, his vision upon human feet is hazy and spinning, he grows light headed and doesn't really care…he just needs water…and then…bed…oh that sounds good….

His legs are shaky when he takes the few hazardous steps to the sink, grasping the edge in relief before he buckled. His brows furrow by the sight of hands, tipped with claws, caressing the marble.

This was one freaky dream.

He shakes his head slowly, side to side, and reaches out, turning the faucet, wonderful liquid falling in a clear rivulet through his fingers. He cups the water and almost sags to the floor on how magnificent the liberating fluid feels to his dry lips and mouth.

He drinks greedily, fatigue setting in once he finishes.

He stands…sleep being his only clear notion.

He raises his head…

And finds the mirror.

Upon seeing his reflection…sleep was no longer an option…

His stomach plummets, weighted down with ice, while his heart leaps up his esophagus, his eyes widen and his jaw could touch the ground….

Can't breathe…

His reflection…

A face.

In one electrical surge, his mind begins working again and a panic attack sets in. He almost slams into the mirror by how quick he leans forward, scrutinizing his nose…his eyes…the hard contours of his cheeks bones and jaw…opens his mouth to see a pink tongue and gleaming fangs…twitching ears catches his attention atop his head…

Oh….damn…

He watches his mirrored self stagger backwards, eyes flicking to a chest, arms, legs…oh hell, he _was_ _naked_!

And he was human!

No, no, a hanyou…he was normal!

Normal body, normal hair, he wasn't a dog anymore!

He doesn't feel the painful slap when he falls to the ground; he shivers out of control and hugs himself, his lungs fill with air…ready to scream…

He needs someone, he's panicking, he's afraid, he doesn't know what happened, he needs someone to hold, tell him he was okay, that this was real, that he wasn't out of his mind!

Good God, he couldn't breathe, his eyes roll up to the ceiling, his back meets the wall, his face stretches…

A husky shrill, a desperate call, fills his ears…and when black envelopes him he knows…

That was his voice.

_**Kagome!**_

* * *

**And CUT! Cliffie! I expect a LOT of reviews peoples! DON'T MAKE ME BEG, DAMMIT! BWAHAHAHHAHA! I WANT REVIEWS! I WANT REVIEWS! **

**YEAAAAAAAAHHHHH!**

**coughs, bows thank you**

** LilYasha**


	14. Clock is Ticking

**Can anyone help me!**

**I have been searching for like three stories on this site, and can't find them! ButI know they're here! They used to be on the internet site, _Iridescent Dreams, _but it closed down (aaaaahhhhh!) before I could even finish them! I've found quite a few except for these couple. I don't remember the names, but I do remember what they were about, if anyone has them or knows where they are PLEASE TELL ME! **

**#1: It's about Sesshomaru finding a mate. But not just any mate, a goddess who's mother was Aphrodite and father was like king of the Sea (forgot his name, it wasn't like LITTLE MERMAID) and she's part siren. He kind of went to her when she was singing, and he denied that he was enchanted. They fight a couple times, end up...ahem...being together and becoming mates. Soon she becomes pregnant, but Hera (Queen of God's and for a reaosnI can't remember) curses her to become human. Now Sesshaomru is having an inferiority complex on having a pathetic human for a mate. **

**#2: An alternate universe fic. Yasha as a pup, running from hateful villagers, jumps into the bone eater's well and ends up in Kag's time. Kag finds him unconcious and begs her momma to keep him. A loving bond is formed. The two are best friends. Let's go ahead to the future, on Kag's 16th b-day, she and Inu fall back into the well. And they can't get back. Especially since Yasha swallowed the jewel to keep Naraku from getting it. And the reprucussions of Kag saving the hanyou from the jewel's power, is crazy! Now she's a cat demon. And new emotions are brought forth, or just magnified. But with not just dealing with a soul bond, and becoming mates, they still have to kill Naraku! By the way, no Shippo. Instead they meet Sango, Miroku, Kirara and Shippo's MOTHER! What next?**

**#3: Last one. Everyone is searching for the jewel shards, even Kikyou. But a new quest has been brought to life, distracting the Inuyasha gang. One scene I remember, is when Inuaysha runs into this field and gets engulfed in a bright agonizing light. When it disappears, he's found bloody and close to death. Kag says she saw his soul being ripped from his body, the only explanation for why he's injured when there's no...INJURIES! There's also a cute inukag fluffy moment in a hot spring...not hentai but I'm not getting into it. The last chapter I read, (not the ending) is Kouga literally trying to KILL Yasha because he thinks Kag is his mate. Now the girl demands an explanation. Uh Oh. **

**Can anyone help me find these? **

**Thank you. **

* * *

TWIST TO THE STORY! Some are going to be pissed. BWAHAHAHA! Enjoy! 

**WARNING: SESSHO OOC! But what else is new?**

**

* * *

Always There **

**CH 14**

* * *

By the shriek of her name, echoing in the back of her skull, Kagome reared up in her bed, gasping and sweating. 

Mind still numb, she twirled around and noticed that it was around five in the morning. Patting and searching through the mass tumble and twirls of her bed covers her already existing panic became strangling when she didn't discover a dozing Yasha.

"Yasha? Yasha where are you?" Nearly jumping out of her skin, Kagome's mouth gaped when her mother and Grandpa, a sleepy Souta standing behind them rubbing his eyes, suddenly barged into her room.

"Kagome, are you alright?"

She furrowed her brows by her mother's worried shout. "Yeah, Momma, I'm fine, but I can't find Yasha." She paused and looked back at them from her frantic searching, "Why are you in here anyway?"

Her Grandpa walked further in, "We heard someone call your name…we thought maybe someone was in here with you?"

The young miko shook her head…the toss slowing when her eyes begin to widen.

"You heard it too?" She jumped to her feet, running past her confused family. "I thought it was just a dream. Hello? Anyone here? Yasha, where the hell are you?" Kagome ignores her family's wide eyes by her slipped cuss word and starts jogging down the hall.

"Hello!" Her grandpa gets in front of her, leading the way. "Grandpa?"

"I heard it coming from here. Come on, follow me."

Kagome hurried her pace, her mind spinning faster. Her dream had ended with that pleading, frightened, shout. A strange dream where Yasha was engulfed in a bright light, darkness blanketing him, and then out from the night…walked _Inuyasha_, arms outstretched, silently begging for her.

She was about to grab him, comfort him…when **_Kagome!_**

She didn't want to think long on it…but it had sounded an awfully like…

Kagome skidded to a stop, staring at the bathroom door. "Grandpa, Momma, wait!" they had already gone ahead of her. "I thought this door was closed when I went to bed. Did anyone go to the bathroom?"

Everybody shook their heads.

Without a second thought, disregarding the fact that _anyone_ could have been in there, she rams into the room.

And finds her long lost puppy, whimpering and trembling on the tile floor. **(TWIST! HE'S STILL A DOG! HAHAHAHA!)**

"Yasha!" A patter of feet, and stunned gasps, but Kagome paid no heed, scooping the little dog into her arms. He winced and moaned, as if in pain, thought there were no injuries she could find. "Yasha…what happened to you?"

He only squeezed his eyes tight and arched with another groan.

Her Grandpa kneeled down beside her. "Kagome, you must go back now. I'm afraid it has gotten worse, whatever it is that ails him. Come, let's get you pa—"

The hanyou pup suddenly howled, convulsing and whining. He buried his face into Kagome's stomach, begging for comfort.

"Yasha!"

"Oh, good Lord, no now! You're going back now! No packing! Let's go!" He grabbed her arm and heaved her to stand, tears already falling. "Kagome!"

She jumped, staring at him, seeing his urgency in his gaze, and nodded with determination. Kagome turned to her panic stricken brother and mother. "I'm sorry, but I'm going back. I'll be back soon, I promise!" She hurried past and down the stairs, calls for her name left behind.

The door slammed, and Ayumi Higurashi turned to her father-in-law.

He met her face-to-face, reading her expression and sighed, "She will keep her promise. And do not worry; I'm sure Yasha will be fine."

Souta sniffed, gripping his shirt, "How? How do you know?"

Grandpa H. knelt down to the young boy and pulled him into an embrace. "I don't…but I have faith in God…all will turn out in time…whatever it may be…"

And once again they were left alone without answers but only horrific imaginings.

_

* * *

Oh, please be alright, please be alright! I'll do **anything**, just lease let Yasha be alright! Her skin tingling with cold, face drying with salt, Kagome skipped and jumped past hidden obstacles and never slowed until she got to her destination. _

This time there was no questioning, no fear, as she jumped into the well.

* * *

It was a dream, it was a dream, it wasn't real, he had been sleeping, dreaming, that's all it was, it wasn't real, he wasn't going insane, it wasn't real, he was not losing his mind! 

_Kagome!_

Ah, ow, it hurt, it hurt, why did he hurt so much? Every muscle in his body was screaming and surging with hot white pain, even his very heart beat, causing his blood to rush furiously with his panic attack, was making him howl in torment.

_Kagome, make it stop. Please make it stop. Kagome! _

Inuyasha yelped when suddenly he felt like he was floating.

He was dying, he died, died again, oh dammit to hell, he had died again!

Then gravity returned and he whimpered in relief, breathing in deeply, wincing when fire unfurled in his chest, but not caring for Kagome was there.

_Kagome…_

"Its okay, Yasha, I'm taking you to Kaede's; she'll know what to do. We'll find a way to make it all better, okay? Just hang with me…oh, please, just stay with me…" Inuyasha pushed back any thoughts on this strange torture he had been put under, by the raspy, slightly hysteric note in his love's voice.

She had been crying…oh, what was going on? Why did he feel like he'd been ripped by the seams and sowed together _wrong_? Why that dream…why was he back in the past…_I didn't have time to make Mrs. Higurashi and everyone…better…I…oh…_why, why, why?

His body erupted in another wave of excruciating pain, slashing at his skin, pulling him apart little by little, stars dancing behind his closed eyelids, muscles twisting, soul screaming…

It ended.

Just like that.

Agony, worse than anything he had ever experienced…and then…gone.

Like it had never happened.

He panted and gasped for breath, feeling as if he had ran for an eternity, he gobbled the cool morning air hungrily, reeling in the bliss that he could breathe in so deeply and feel no pain.

If he could, he would have wept in liberation. That was utter torture, and now it was done.

But why had it happened in the first place?

* * *

Kagome lurched to a stop when suddenly, after an ear-piercing wail, Yasha slumped against her chest, breathing heavily. She looked own at him, caressing his face in urgency, he rubbing his nose into her palm with a little doggy grin. Gently she moved her fingers down his stomach, poking his legs, rotating his paws, this time by the physical contact, he didn't wince or moan. 

The pain was gone.

_What the…_"Yasha? Are you okay, please look at me, come on…" she sniffed back tears of joy or fear, when he slowly opened his eyes.

He nodded, his golden orbs dazed but relieved.

"Oh thank goodness…" she supposed it was foolish to take the words, or ahem actions, of a dog instead of a professional. And besides this _was_ a form of Inuyasha's soul, he never admitted to weakness and injury when he was alive.

But somehow…she believed him…and she sagged to her knees, tears spilling down never ending.

"Y-You really scared me, Yasha. Do-don't do that again okay?" her little pup rolled his eyes and nodded, licking her chin.

_It's not like I did it on purpose, baka. But…I'm sorry for worrying you…_he smiled, warmth glowing in his chest, by her concern. It really was nice to be cared about.

His ears twitched.

"Kagome? Lady Kagome, what are you doing here?"

Kagome stood up slowly, eyes squinting to see before her, her face brightened, "Miroku! Hey, Miroku, hi!" She waved, between wiping at her cheeks.

Inuyasha craned his neck to see the monk racing up the hill to greet them, worry in his violet-blue eyes. After a moment he reached them and leaned forward over his knees, straining for air.

Kagome tilted her head and hugged her puppy tight, waiting for the man to recover. "Miroku, what are you doing here so early? The sun's not even up yet."

Though it was hard to be certain, a nerve wracking fog had descended the land, and a chilling wind nipped at her unprotected arms. There was an eerie calm, a feeling of waiting…

Something was going to happen.

Something important.

Miroku straightened and rubbed his chin, "I could not sleep and was taking a short walk."—that was _sort_ of the truth. There _had_ been a niggling feeling in the back of his subconscious, stealing his fatigue from their journey back to the village. But besides that, he felt a calling…to go to the well…something was wrong…it was a good thing he always followed his instincts—"But that's beside the point, I should be asking _you_ that question."

Kagome bit her lip and sniffed, "I thought there was something wrong with Yasha, but he seems fine now." She unconsciously started caressing the dog's ears.

The monk glanced down and met Inuyasha's gaze, he silently questioned, but lifted his head back to the girl. "What happened? You seem pale. And Yasha looks exhausted." He narrowed his eyes and grabbed Kagome's arm, pulling her to walk back to the village. "Come on, tell me what happened. It's not like you to only stay in your time for one night."

Kagome took a deep breath, a shiver streaming down her spine (she wasn't sure if from the cold or…something else…) and related the tale. Of her early worry on Yasha's oversleeping, his shivering from cold and then fever, his passing out, and the shriek of her name in the night, to finding Yasha on the bathroom floor: Miroku listened in rapt attention, constantly flicking his gaze to the little dog, whose eyelids were drooping.

Finally she was through, and Miroku looked down at his feet in thought, "Do you believe it could be from that demon attack? Maybe some demon poison that Inuyasha's blood had missed."

Kagome sniffed again, rubbing her cold nose, "I kind of thought that earlier…also that maybe Inuyasha's blood was affecting Yasha's dog body in some bad way…but it sounded farfetched…"

"Mmmm…mine does too…but I guess it would be silly to worry, he seems recovered." Miroku lifted a brow, to see that his perished and reincarnated friend was dozing. There _was_ something amiss…but that could just be melodrama brought on by the disturbing atmosphere surrounding them that morning.

"Yeah, you're right. But we're going to stay here just to be certain. I'll get my stuff later." She gave a mighty yawn, "I feel better here, like you guys can handle anything."

Miroku chuckled, "Not always true, but I supposed we _are_ more used to strange and unnatural things then the people of your world."

Kagome laughed and rubbed the corner of her eye, "I'm so bushed now. I guess I'll take a little cat nap when we get back to the village."

"Good idea, but it seems Yasha has already beaten you to it." They both looked down at the slumbering hanyou/dog and forced out another laugh. They really didn't feel any source of humor at seeing him conked out again; instead it only served to raise their anxiety and dread ever higher.

If only the powers that be had waited on the fog, it really wasn't appreciated at the moment.

The trio walked in silence, comfortable and unnoticed, both humans so wrapped up in disturbing thoughts that they couldn't shake. Every little creak and crack of their footsteps was booming to their ears, and the murmuring breeze teasing the back of their necks, felt like icy fingernails.

So it nearly had them scream like little children, even if they were brave shard hunters who fought horrific nightmarish demons, when Yasha perked up, sniffed, barked hysterically and leapt from Kagome's arms, tendrils of mist dancing around him when he landed on the ground.

They both called his name in question, but the little dog ignored them, wobbling a bit, and shaking his head as if to clear it, and then dashing into the overhanging ceiling of fog.

The smoky ribbons swallowed Yasha whole, and thought it was invisible to their human eyes, Kagome and Miroku knew he had ran smack dab into the forest.

This wasn't going to bode well.

* * *

What was he doing? 

What the hell was he thinking?

He should just ignore it, turn back, run back into Kagome's arms, and sleep this crazy idea off, so it could never return. But instead, he had decided to ask questions later and follow his nose.

He and his nose should have known better! How dare his nose take control over his brain! Bad nose, bad!

But here he was, lost in the gripping hold of the forest, thankfully filtering the fog, allowing him to see clearly (or clear enough so he wouldn't run into anything) and looking for something that would most likely…_kill him!_

Oh dammit it all to hell, he must be exhausted. To have this notion and actually act upon it, he must be suffering from sleep deprivation!

But--he sighed--he knew that couldn't be it, he had been sleeping enough to last him a lifetime. His only excuse for this outlandish trip he was taking…he was a Goddamned freaking idiot!

_You're going to die, you know that don't you? You're a **dog** right now, if you'd forgotten! You have no sword, no claws…well teeny ones that can hardly scratch paper…you're going to be ripped to **shreds**!_

And yet, here he was, nose to the dirt, searching through scents and following the trail.

What a good day to die.

The path led him to his destination, a growl rumbled in his throat, and he lowered his upper torso to the ground, teeth bared, ears laid back.

He ignored the strange fact that they were at his grave.

Inuyasha's attention was fully locked on the man before him, who was straightening from his kneeling position, and dusting off his hands.

He turned his head, and caught the hanyou's gaze.

Yasha shivered, a rock of dismay plummeting in his stomach.

_Sesshomaru. _

* * *

He had needed to escape. 

To think, to recover, to plan on what to do next; ever since he had awoken up from that dream, to find himself covered in blood, aching and sore, and discovering…he had a new left arm…

It had gotten too much.

His ears were still ringing by Jakken's and Rin's shrieking babble about his new grown appendage.

He had needed to be alone.

So he had left.

He had told Rin of his plans, that he would return safely very soon, but Jakken did not know that…Sesshomaru's lip twitched, that slimy toad was probably bawling by now.

The humor ended, it lived a short existence; he continued to read over the grave stone's exquisitely carved words.

**_Our beloved Inuyasha, the bravest of us all. A loyal friend…a great leader. May he…finally know peace. _**

_But will he? If he is to return to life, will he not know the same pain? What is to change? Why make him suffer again?_

Sesshomaru knelt down, and picked up a strange drawing, a faded picture, covered in grime and torn around the edges. But the demon couldn't miss the characters colored upon the paper, the disturbing familiarity done in cartoons.

The scene of lying on the grass, hugging one another and the sun shining down upon them, was very peaceful.

And yet, with the teasing cold pricking his uncovered hand, the wind whistling through the leaves, it didn't leave him feeling…serene.

Perhaps it was a bad idea to allow his feet to lead him to this place.

This place of resting, of finality…or waiting…Inuyasha was not to stay here forever…was never here in the first place. He was alive, in a different form, walking along, living…waiting as well…for his true body to come.

Wasn't that it?

He was already alive and well.

It was quite silly then, to stand before this tree, this grave, and to be affected by the aura of grief surrounding it. Of the sadness and regret, beginning to tease the storm inside of him that he had somewhat successfully buried away, to make them surge forward and tighten his chest and throat.

Quite silly, especially when that dog ran in and began to growl at him.

When Sesshomaru stood up and looked down at the little puppy, there was no doubt in his mind.

The scent, the fur, the ears, eyes and inner soul reflected there.

He knew who it was.

And quickly, expertly, locked the mask firmly in place; with a grating power, stubborn and strong, pushed his emotions down, froze them and urged the critical ice to flow in his veins, and to settle his thoughts.

He was standing before his younger brother.

In…a puppy's body…Sesshomaru caught the want to laugh anddestroyed it.

There was no mistaking the hatred and anger in those amber orbs, a clear let on by the way fangs were bore and hair was raised.

Inuyasha was still pissed, still wary to be around him, still soaked in loathing.

Sesshomaru would have to pretend to feel the same way.

He could not show what that hanyou's death had done to him, what had changed within him, and how horribly he was at controlling it.

He could not show weakness to his younger brother, if so…Inuyasha would never forget it…and would do all he could to make sure Sesshomaru didn't either.

This upcoming conversation was most likely….not going to bode well.

Sesshomaru forced himself to glare and to twist up a corner of his mouth maliciously, but inwardly he winced when Inuyasha visibly shuddered and faltered.

He kept on his act and slowly parted his lips, making his throat contract and grumble.

"_Hello…little brother…"_

* * *

Yasha blinked, when his older brother's growl…quickly translated itself in his head and danced three words before his thoughts. 

_Hello…little brother…_it was a greeting, oozing with cold humor, a promise of pain…it was three words…that meant everything.

Inuyasha forgot about his hovering terror, of his masking anger and coiling instinct to run up and sink his teeth into that bastard's leg…when those first words exchanged between the two brothers reached his ears.

It sent his head spinning…Sesshomaru knew who he was…he was standing before his grave…he was going to kill him…he could talk to him…he could…

He could talk to him!

By the one blatant understanding, sent all of Inuyasha's former thoughts and plans in disarray…his brother could understand him…

He was practically trembling from the uproarious emotions that notion brought.

He could talk to someone! And…and…_they could talk back!_

He could have a conversation…a real, true, damn conversation…with a real person!

And…and…oh, dammit to hell…someone could understand him and that was all that mattered!

Right when he felt a lift to his soul, the onslaught of laughter, a turning upward of his lips…Inuyasha immediately slapped himself.

Well…mentally anyway.

He couldn't do that!

Now that Sesshomaru knew he was alive, he was sure to want to stab him clear through with that damn sword of his.

What was he thinking, having a pleasant conversation with his hateful bastard brother? The person, who ripped out his eyes, stabbed him and poisoned him, practically hunted him day after day!

A pleasant conversation his ass!

_Okay, get a hold of yourself; you need to stay in control--_Which was becoming damn difficult, this stupid puppy body of his was just begging to whoop and bark with happiness, run up and lick his brother's cheek and while he was at it, ask for a tummy rub….yeah…that was definitely not a good idea!

Whose idea was it to put him in this body? Why couldn't he have had a body he could control? All these stupid damn needs, and urges, these instincts that ruled over him, the emotions that seemed magnified to an uncontainable level.

He was standing before his murderous older brother who despised his guts, and he was…_happy!_

All because he was going to be able to talk to someone.

Yeah, right, the only words he could probably say would be…well…OW!

_This is not good, not good at all, get a hold of yourself! Stupid damn body, I'm in control, and I say that we bite his ankle off! No, no, no, don't be happy, don't bark, don't say anything at all! Okay? I'm in control, dammit!_

Oh, yeah, this had probably been his mother's idea. She must have known he would have problems controlling the doggy spirit to be carefree, protective, nurturing and loving.

He could have had those emotions in any ol' body too, but the puppy body was the only one where he couldn't control it!

_There better not be any side effects when I get back in my old body. I can't ask for a tummy rub when I'm hanyou! Oh, no!_ Okay, he was going nuts; he had noticed from the past weeks, that he had a tendency to be overdramatic in this body. As well, as hyperactive, cuddly and well…he acted like any normal puppy dog!

_Get a hold of yourself, dammit!_

Oh yeah…yep…he was going to die.

* * *

Sesshoamru tilted his in curiosity by the swirling emotions playing across the shabby face of his younger brother reborn. There was anger, hatred of course, then slight fear, then all of a sudden, shock, happiness, surprise, dismay, frustration, and then… 

It was getting hard to keep track.

_What has happened to you, little brother? You would have never sunk into thought like this before, or to allow such feelings to show. You have changed…_well, duh, like being a dog wasn't his first clue.

Sesshoamru shook his head, and found himself sitting on his haunches. He could feel his mask softening.

"_Inuyasha." _The dog jumped and looked at him. The older demon could tell he was trying to control himself, but in the end, he couldn't hide the happiness and excitement in his gaze.

That was strange and unexpected.

Cautiously the hanyou pup took a step forward and lowered his head, but not in a defensive stance, his tail was wagging (unknown by him) and his face was clearly curious and…hopeful.

"_You…can understand me…?" _The question filled Sesshomaru's head. He furrowed his brows.

"_Of course I can,"_ he answered, he ignored the way Inuyasha's eyes widened and a doggy grin bloomed on his face, _"I am a dog demon after all. I have the ability to speak to the lower species."_

If Inuyasha had caught on to the slight insult, he didn't show it. By that simple explanation, the happiness exploding within him nearly engulfed him whole.

_Get a hold of yourself…stay in control…_it couldn't be helped. His feelings reined over all, and before he could stop it…a massive bark slipped out of him and he was spinning around in circles, doggy laughter spewing over.

A massive understatement, but…Sesshomaru was a little shocked.

His eardrums thrummed with Inuyasha's excited blab, _"Yes, yes, yes, finally! Someone can understand me; I can talk to someone, a real conversation! No more acting, no more guessing, someone can understand me! Yes!" _

The hanyou forced himself to slow and swallow his ecstatic shouts. But by the struggle, he was left trembling and hyper.

Not good.

A small nip of embarrassment took him when he met Sesshomaru's eyes. _"Sorry…"_ he mumbled. _"But you don't understand. These humans have no idea what I've been saying and the **cat** has been the only thing I could talk to for weeks! I've been going out of my mind!"_ By what he had just let slip, Inuyasha's ears laid back sheepishly.

This was his last day to live…and he couldn't make himself feel worry or fear.

Stupid body…

* * *

Sesshoamru tilted his head to the side, ignoring how something inside of him relaxed on how clearly happy Inuyasha was…not to see him of course…but it still left him with the same affect. He concentrated on keeping his expression aloof and impassive. 

"_That must be frustrating…now I wish for an explanation. Why are you a…puppy…little brother…?" _he mentally patted himself on the back from not smiling.

_You don't have to answer him you know, you don't have to say anything. You can still escape from certain death…_but it was of no use. The temptation was too hard to pass up.

Before Inuyasha knew it, he had launched into retelling the whole tale, with bubbling enthusiasm.

* * *

Ever since he had heard the news from his father, Sesshomaru had imagined what would happen if the two brothers would meet again. He had been expecting anger, harsh words, a drawing of swords and a blood bath. 

Not an ecstatic little puppy ranting and laughing and pacing as he told the entire tale on how he came to be in his present state.

He didn't know how it happened, it had went too fast, but somehow Sesshomaru found himself sitting crisscrossed and relaxed, listening attentively to Inuyasha's hurried ramblings.

This was how serene felt.

It almost felt as good as relief.

"_And then Kagome had the gall to SIT me right when a demon decided to attack us. **I have come for the jewel shards, **shit, that's all they ever say! And, damn this stupid body, it hurt like hell when it stabbed me through the stomach…"_

"_What?" _Sesshomaru blinked, kind of off kilter by that remark. _"You got stabbed? In this body…how are you still alive today?"_

Inuyasha grinned, _"What? Do you think I'd let that thing kill me? I may be a weak little puppy right now, but that doesn't mean I can't hold my own and take a beating. Sheesh, who do you think I am?"_

Sesshomaru clicked his tongue dryly, _"Oh yes, the ol' powerful Inuyasha, how did I forget?"_

Inuyasha tilted his head, surprised by his words. _Whoa…did he just say a joke…? _He shook his head and concentrated when Sesshomaru started to speak.

"_This new form of yours…it must not be very much to your liking…"_ Sesshomaru smirked by the exaggerated sigh.

"_You have no idea! Being a puppy is so frustrating, no body understands you, and they give you the nastiest food, and let's not forget the after effects!"_

"_After effects?"_

"_Yeah, I can't control this damn body. Every little thing sets it off, when I'm happy I don't just smile or laugh…oh no, I get hyper! I get so mopey and whiney when I'm sad, and then there are the stupid instincts that I can't ignore! But do you want to know the very worst possible thing…?"_

He actually found himself…enjoying this, _"And what is that?"_

Inuyasha suddenly began to growl, eyes gleaming and a hazy red surrounding the edges of his golden irises, his voice was low and laced with menace,_ "It's…this…**tail**!" _He twisted his head around, his growl becoming deeper when he saw that it was wagging. _"It's moves on its own and it…ugh, dammit!" _

The next thing Sesshomaru knew, his younger brother was chasing his tail in circles, trying to sink his teeth into it. It was most difficult to keep from laughing.

Who knew his hanyou half brother could be so entertaining.

"_Inuyasha…?"_

He soon flopped onto his stomach in defeat, gasping and dizzy. He glared at his older brother with a sullen undertone, _"Don't look so smug…it mocks me, Sessho…" _

Sesshomaru stilled by the little nickname, he hadn't been called that…in years…ever since…they were pups…

He pushed back the thoughts when Inuyasha gave a massive yawn, tongue lolling from his mouth and back arched down. When he stood up, his eyelids were drooped and his ears swiveled lazier to unknown sounds.

It was quite a drastic change.

"_Are you alright…?"_

Inuyasha blinked and slowly shook his head, wobbling from side to side, _"No…something's wrong…but I don't know what…it's been happening for days now…"_

Sesshomaru cocked his head to the side, his arrogant younger brother had just admitted to a weakness.

He _had_ changed.

Suddenly Inuyasha straightened, ears perked, fatigue pushed back, he looked to the side, sniffing the air. Sesshomaru frowned and concentrated, sure enough…there were voices…calling _Yasha, Yasha…_heading closer.

The fun and relaxation was over.

A reality check settled in or more like punched a certain hanyou's stomach.

_Oh, holy shit, Kagome and Miroku! They're coming this way…to here…with Sesshomaru! And I can't protect them! Oh man and here I was **talking**! What the hell is wrong with me?_ He looked over and jumped when he saw Sesshomaru stiffen and crack his knuckles.

_Oh no you don't…_it was time to get their relationship back to how it was before. They despised and lusted to ring the life out from the other. There were no pleasant conversations or even the remote chance of acting brotherly….like they had so long ago…

"_I hate you! You promised, you promised!"_

"_I lied!"_

* * *

Sesshomaru became rigid when a disturbing growl, tingled his spine. He had never heard such a ravenous sound, quivering with rage…and slight fear…and it was even more amazing to know that it came from a tiny dog. 

He looked over and saw Inuyasha in how he was when he first ran in, but more dangerous and threatening. The growl only became deeper and louder when he tried to stand.

"_Inuyasha…" _it was most annoying, they had spoken to each other for a good portion of time without trying to break each other's necks. Which he could have done easily! Why now was Inuyasha acting hostile, didn't he see that he had no plans to kill anyone? It vaguely disturbed Sesshomaru how angry this made him. _"Stand down little brother, I will not hurt your precious **friends**." _

Inuyasha bristled by how he spoke the word, like it left a bitter taste in his mouth. _"And why should I trust you, bastard! You know I can't protect them that well in this body, but mark my words if you lay even one finger on that sword of yours I'll rip your throat out!"_

Sesshomaru abruptly stood, red eyes erupting with rage, _"You know you could do know such thing. I could easily rip you to pieces, but look down upon yourself little brother. You are unharmed and very much alive. I would watch your tongue if you wish to stay that way."_

Inuyasha had never seen his older brother quick to such anger, it had always disturbed him how cold and emotionless he had been in the past. Especially when they were pups, Sesshomaru was a pretty affectionate, fun and emotional guy. There was something different about his Sesshomaru…something changed…rearranged… familiar…

It didn't matter.

If he allowed himself to be distracted or to believe this bastard's lies, they would all die.

Wow, and a moment ago he had enjoyed talking with him. They sure had a hot and cold relationship.

"_Like I would let you! I don't know what possessed me to act so…so…"_

"_Vulnerable?"_

"_Shut the hell up! I told you this damn body of mine can't be controlled, but that doesn't mean it can't pack a wallop. You'd be surprised the amount of hurt I can put on you."_

Sesshomaru gave a bark of laughter, _"Like biting my toes off? You are weak and pathetic little brother."_

"_I could still kick your ass! I mean, you must be itching to fight me. To have Naraku kill me before you could, that must have really hurt your ego. But here I am, alive and stuck in this weak little thing. So what are you going to do? Would you go so low as in murdering me now?" _

Inuyasha yelped when suddenly he was picked up by the scruff of his neck. He was now face to face with a very pissed off full dog demon_. "How dare you think so low of me! I would never do such a barbaric thing."_

"_And how do I know that? You've wanted to kill me all our lives, and now you have your chance! Do it, Sesshomaru! You don't want to be weak in front of me, do you? Kill me if you have the guts to do so!"_

Sesshomaru snapped his jaws, causing Yasha to flinch, _"I am not going to kill you, Inuyasha! I have never wanted to! But if you continue to play with fire, you shall surely find yourself in that dark place again. And this time, I don't know if Mom and Dad will want to bring your sorry ass back to life!"_

Inuyasha tried to retort, but was a little lost of words from that last admittance. _He's never wanted…to kill me…that can't be true…he always wanted to kill me…what is he going on about…?_

Sesshomaru quickly cooled his gaze when he realized his words, but he could not back track now.

Inuyasha finally got a hold of his tongue, but his voice was soft and gentle, laced with bewilderment. _"What the hell are you talking about? I don't…you've always…"_

"_I never had the courage or heart to do so. But I am able to; I could, without trying, kill you even in your best condition."_

The poor hanyou was off balanced. Pretty soon, before he would know it, Naraku would drop from the sky and say he loved him. _"I…uh…what…but…um…"_

Sesshomaru sighed, _"I do not wish to go farther into this topic of conversation. But I will tell you now, I am not going to hurt any of your friends. To do so, would be the lowest of despicable actions. They are your pack, and you are their leader, as well as my brother. Even though we've had our differences, I do respect you when it comes to that. On how you died, little brother, was most honorable, no one, neither I, can deny that." _

Everything that was being said just sounded like a lulling hum. Inuyasha was more than a little shocked. He slowly circled his head and looked down at his grave, before meeting his brother's eyes once more. _"You've…been here before…haven't you…I smelled you…"_

Sesshomaru nodded, _"When I was here, I met your monk friend, and he was the one that related the tale upon your demise. He was quite…forceful…" _the older demon turned away and stared down at where, a while ago, he had thought to be his brother's final resting place.

Inuyasha couldn't rip his eyes away from him. And he couldn't have the heart to continue to threaten or struggle from his grasp. His amber orbs flickered across the pale face of his older brother, and slowly that quiet whisper, of wise command, rendered into his mind.

_**You must forgive him now. He is tortured by a storm of regret and guilt. He knows of his past actions, and wishes for redemption. Comfort him, show him that you do not hold anything against him. **_

_But I should…he's tried to kill me countless times…has made my life a living hell…_

Before he knew it, Inuyasha began sniffing the air and was choked by the overwhelming stench of regret, guilt, and a remnant of grief. It was cloaked by indifference and anger, but to his keen new nose, the hanyou couldn't miss it.

_He is hurting…_

_**Forgive him. **_

_But I…_

"_Little Yasha, do you want me to read you a story tonight?"_

"_Are you okay? You're not hurt are you?"_

"_Sure I'll teach you how to hunt."_

"_Good night, Yasha, sleep tight, we'll play some more in the morning."_

"_I could never hate you Yasha, we're brothers forever."_

"_I…I love you too…"_

Inuyasha couldn't help it…he smiled…strange sweet warmth billowed inside of him relaxing a tense part of him that had tortured him for years. He couldn't very easily forget their past fights and cruel words, of the pain they wrought on each other. They couldn't…_oh, shit, I'm being held up by his left arm!_

Yasha shook his head, his mind already struggling to soak everything in. He closed his eyes and tried to relax his spinning thoughts, when he felt air whoosh past his ears and solid ground beneath his feet.

He opened his eyes, to find Sesshomaru sitting cross-legged once more, head bowed, eyes closed, like he was deep in thought.

When staring up at him, that bone deep weariness and exhaustion cloaked his senses once more, and tiny tremors started to snake down his spine. That's how it started in Kagome time…was the pain going to come back again?

A tiny shoot of fear fell into his gut and the tremors grew stronger. He found himself struggling to keep his footing or to even keep his eyes open. Inuyasha began to walk over to his older brother, trying to quell the whimpers rising in his throat.

He was too tired to go into denial and push it back…he would forgive him…for now…

So tired.

Had it gotten colder?

_**The time is near.**_

* * *

He couldn't look at him. 

He wasn't sure if it was shame, or fear of what he'd see in those eyes. But he just couldn't do it. And so he waited…for something to be said…

He didn't expect the cold nose and warm fur pushing into his hand instead.

Sesshomaru opened his eyes and looked down, stunned to find Yasha rubbing his snout into his palm. _"Inuyasha…?"_

The only response was a whimper and then he collapsed against his leg. Sesshomaru's eyes widened, "_Inuyasha…what is ailing you…?"_

Inuyasha couldn't think straight, he was too tired; all he could manage was to repeat the mantra going on in his head, _"The time is near…the time is near…"_

Sesshomaru cautiously picked up the dog and flipped him over, noting how his paws twitched and shivered, _"Inuyasha…open your eyes…tell me what's wrong…what do you mean…?" _Another whimper, a cracking yawn, _"Little brother, now!"_

Inuyasha flinched, his eyes opening a tiny fraction, _"I'm sorry…too tired…talk later….oh…time is near…"_ he snuggled into the folds of Sesshomaru's kimono, seeking warmth, and started to doze off.

The older demon shook him, and the little pup groaned, _"Ugh, dammit, I forgive you already, 'kay Sessho? Now let me sleep…I'm…suddenly…really….really…….sleepy…"_

Sesshomaru's' eyes widened, _Forgive me…_More on that later, didn't Inuyasha say that there was something wrong with him? Time was near…what the hell did that mean?

He remembered this feeling, he had gotten it countless times when Little Yasha would fall or hurt himself during their games or hurting lessons. It always served to twist his guts into knots.

And he had always hated it.

The older demon, watched when, quickly, too quickly for his state of mind, Inuyasha succumbed to a deep, deep slumber. So lost, that he didn't even twitch when Sesshomaru lightly pulled his sensitive ears.

There was something terribly wrong.

He immediately stood up, cradled the hanyou pup close and began to walk out of the forest, knowing that it was mid morning, and that an awakening village was near.

Along the way, Little Yasha would softly say those four words over and over.

The time is near…

But for what, worried the older demon greatly.

Whatever it could be, it was sure not to bode too well.

* * *

**Bad ending, but it was already 20 pages long on word! You guys can manage. Now please review, I know some of you are going to be ranting at me, that's for certain. **

**YEAH! Thisis going to be fun...maybe...**

**TILL NEXT UPDATE!**

**LilYasha **


	15. The Reward for Patience

**The chapter you've all been waiting for! Dun dun dun dunnnnnn!**

**Enjoy!**

**Dedicated to **StarcatcherAD **and to my anime/manga freaked, school buddy who will only be named **Sweet16 **who has a new forum out (which I am an admin. YES!) which I say you ALL need to go to RIGHT NOW!**

**Linkie!**

**THAT...I can't put on here...hmmm...well then...GO TO MY PROFILE! NOW!**

* * *

**And I am so happy, which you all will understand once you read this chapter!**

**DO IT NOW!**

**

* * *

Always There **

**CH 15**

* * *

Humans could be so overdramatic. 

It was quite annoying at times.

But he had learned to deal with their exaggerated stupidity, since he allowed one to travel with him daily.

Except now with his low control on his anger, they were _really_ starting to piss him off.

Sesshomaru tried to stay aloof and calm, mechanically rubbing Yasha's ears (an old forgotten trick when they were pups) to relax the poor hanyou, whose moans and whimpers were becoming nearly strangled. In the short times he was conscious; Inuyasha had whispered that the pain was getting worse…though not as bad as before.

The fact that there _was_ a before…didn't serve to lighten up the tense knot in Sesshomaru's stomach.

He concentrated on breathing in deep and slow, nearly biting his tongue off to keep from growling.Which...he found...didn't really calm humans that much. He opened his eyes, having to close them to gain control, and glared at the two members of his younger brother's pack, still shouting at him to put the puppy down and to back away.

Oh please.

If he wanted to, he would have ripped their throats out by now.

But, though they were melodramatic and weak, humans tended to be quite brave…no matter the consequences they would surely face.

Like having their throats ripped out.

It _would_ shut them up.

But he'd never hear the end of it from the dog in his arms.

Sesshomaru looked own at his brother and sniffed, alarmed by the heightening stench of demon blood emanating from him. His body temperature had raised as well, a little bundle of pulsating heat. His shivers had become feverish.

Inuyasha didn't _smell_ sick.

But he had all the signs of it.

The only explanation the dog demon could give for the smell of youkai blood; well…if he _was_ sick…it was there to cure him. In the ramblings a while ago, Inuyasha had said something about there was still a _tiny bit_ of it flowing through his veins.

The reason for that…Sesshomaru didn't know.

But there was no more time for dawdling that was sure, Inuyasha needed medical attention, and soon.

It was time to deal with these pesky humans once and for all.

* * *

Now if you were searching for the reborn soul of your pack leader, someone who had tended to jump into things without fore planning and never admitted to weakness, coming out in his most hated enemy's arms…not moving… 

You would have jumped to the nearest conclusion Kagome and Miroku had went to as well.

But though the two humans were in a battle ready position, arrow cocked, wind tunnel ready to suck…Sesshomaru was completely at ease.

It concerned the monk on why Inuyasha was actually allowing his despicable brother to hold him and touch his sensitive, OFF-LIMITS, ears.

Even unconscious, the hanyou was _always_ aware of everything around him and he was _always_ ready for battle.

But from what Miroku could see, he wasn't doing anything.

He appeared to be…_sleeping_.

But that wasn't possible, if Inuyasha wasn't moving or defending himself that must mean he was either in terrible trouble…like he was poisoned or something…or…held captive (the little guy wasn't that strong)…or…he was…he was…!

Miroku's melodramatic thoughts were cut off when Sesshomaru relieved his silent worries. "You're dog is not dead, nor is he injured. I have not done him no harm."

Kagome sighed in relief but didn't lower her weapon, "Then put Yasha down!"

Miroku nodded, and cracked his cursed hand's knuckles, "Yes! You put him down this instant! Or we will have to use force!"

Sesshomaru actually rolled his eyes, his voice dry and low, "I could easily kill you two. But I will not do so. I would most likely be damned by my brother's perished soul if any harm came to either of his pack members." There was a tiny chuckle from the seemingly asleep puppy. "But I ask again for both of you to step aside, your…_Yasha_…requires medical attention. He is ill. I found him unconscious in the forest."

_That_…made the two humans falter. Kagome stepped forward, eyes glassy, cheeks pale, "H-he did…?"

Sesshomaru tilted his head, "Yes…when he was conscious he told me that this has happened before?"

Kagome nodded.

Miroku flinched and unclasped the beads surrounding his cursed hand. "What do you mean 'he _told_ you'?" _If they can talk to one another…that means…Sesshomaru knows that's…Inuyasha…_

The dog-demon met his gaze, and his lips twirled upward. Miroku's spine trembled.

He knew.

"Yes, monk, I can speak with him. I _am_ a _dog_-demon. I do know the language quite fluently."

That got the miko and monk off kilter. For different personal reasons.

Kagome shook her head, "You can…_talk_ to him?"

Sesshomaru gave a small sound of impatience, "Yes, you silly girl, I have already established that fact."

Inuyasha glared at him with foggy eyes, _"Don't be rude…that's a little weird to humans…"_

Sesshomaru mumbled under his breath, _"They are frustrating me…your fever has went up a few notches and your **friends** are wasting my time."_

Yasha smirked, _"Frustrating to **you**? At least they can understand you…" _the hanyou's pupils dilated and he stared off into space. Pretty soon they drifted close and he was asleep once more.

The knot tightened.

Sesshomaru allowed the growl to spring forth. Kagome and Miroku jumped.

"Inuyasha is sick, and I know there is a village nearby. If you wish for your puppy to live…_back away!"_

Both of the humans' thoughts went racing.

Kagome: _Did he just say…**Inu**yasha?_

Miroku: _Dammit…he **does** know!_

Sesshomaru took the chance, when they were distracted, to continue walking. Following his nose instead of his eyes to head to the right direction, the fog had not yet lifted though the sun was surely shining behind the gray curtain.

Miroku blinked, and hurried off after him. Kagome in pursuit. But before the miko could get in ear shot, Miroku hurriedly whispered under his breath, "You do know on whom you are carrying? Correct, Sesshomaru?" the monk glanced down at his reborn friend and gulped.

Sesshomaru sighed in annoyance, "Yes, monk, and I take it you know of…_Yasha's_ little secret as well?"

He nodded.

"Have you told anybody?"

To that, Miroku shook his head. He still hadn't had the courage.

The dog-demon looked back to a now walking Kagome, head bowed in thought, not trying to get any closer to the two.

"So…Inuyasha's mate still does not know. I would think she would need this information more than you…"

Miroku ignored the word…mate. Inuyasha might not like to know that was being discussed right above him. "No…she is still not through with her grieving. The pain is still too fresh. If I tell her that Yasha is…"

Sesshomaru nodded and turned his head forward, away from the girl, "She would most likely break…"

Miroku sighed, "Yes…even with the knowledge that Yasha could be Inuyasha's _reincarnation…_was too hard to bear. She has just now accepted it."

The monk's head bounced upward in shock by a chuckle. It was coming from Sesshomaru….he was smiling! In true humor!

The demon in turn ignored his wide eyes, "I don't believe you need to tell anyone about what you have learned. It would be useless."

"And why the hell is that?"

"You will know in time. Just be patient. Now…there is a physician knowledgeable of dogs in this village…correct?"

* * *

Humans really were perplexing creatures. 

Whenever he thought he understood them completely, they would do something to shock him and send his previous conclusions scattered.

Like now.

He was sitting in a rank little hut, surrounded by his younger brother's pack who were staring at him with wide eyes and tense shoulders, just waiting for him to pounce or start frothing at the mouth.

Except for her.

She must have known she was the weakest of the bunch, besides the little kitsune of course, who looked about ready to throw up on having him there. And yet she showed no fear. She treated him like anybody else that must have walked through her doors.

Even though he was a despicable evil creature who had murdered hundreds just for fun.

Nope, she had even smiled at him when taking Inuyasha from his grasp.

Now she was sitting in front of him overlooking his little brother, checking his pulse and other vital signs.

Besides the pulse thing, Sesshomaru had no clue what the hell she was doing.

He watched attentively, finding himself uncomfortable and strangely self conscious by the eyes observing his every move.

Though, he must admit, it must be a tad peculiar to having your deceased friend's older brother, someone who had tried countless times to murder him, sitting civilly in their midst.

That was still no excuse to forget their manners.

Even a heartless cold bastard like himself, knew that staring was rude.

Thankfully that old woman broke the silence, and she turned up and smiled at him once more. Sesshomaru just didn't understand humans. What was she so happy about?

"I'd like to thank ye for bringing him here, Lord Sesshomaru. If ye were not there, little Yasha would most likely had not made it." The woman stroked the puppy's flank and wrapped him up in a warm toasty blanket that had been sitting by the fire.

Those words brought a cold shiver to his insides. He made sure not to let it show. "Is he in danger? What is wrong with him? He has no scent of illness." Dammit, he sounded pathetic!

She then sighed. Worry finally showing on her wrinkly face, "Aye, ye are correct. He is not sick. But…I do not know what is ailing him."

His brother's mate switched her gaze to the old hag, "But he _has_ to be sick, what else could be wrong with him? Oh, God, is he poisoned?" She tightened her fists to the point all blood drained from her fingers.

Sesshomaru frowned, "I would have smelled it. He is not poisoned."

Miroku trapped him in a cold glittering gaze, there was a hint of challenge in his voice, "You said earlier you are able to speak with him. Can you not ask him what is wrong?"

Humans could be so infuriating as well as confusing, "Yes, monk I can. And I have already questioned him." Sesshomaru turned away, "He had no answers. All he said was…the time is near…that was all."

By that piece of bewildering information, Miroku's eyes lowered as he mulled over the puzzle, "The time is near…what could In--um, Yasha mean by that?"

The other young woman, leaned muscled and stroking a three tailed neko, turned to the old woman, "Lady Kaede, do you have any theories?"

That cat met Sesshomaru's eyes, and he stiffened. He had never liked cats. But her eyes kind of…softened and she mewed, before snuggling into her master's lap.

The dog demon ripped his curious and even more confused thoughts to what the old woman (he now knew was named Kaede) was saying, "Nay, Sango, I am afraid I do not." She hung her head and lifted the dozing dog, "I would like it though, if ye would kindly stay Lord Sesshomaru."

There was a stunned silence, and Sesshomaru knew he must have looked slightly shocked. Though not as much as everyone else in the room. All the humans looked like they had been struck in the gullet.

Sesshomaru swallowed and worked his tongue, "And…why is that?"

Lady Kaede willingly stared him straight in the eye and had the nerve to give a cocky smile, Sesshomaru bristled. "Ye do not have to if it is too much of a hassle. I know of how busy your life must be. But if ye could wait here until Yasha is awake and ask him some questions for us, it would be highly appreciated." She tilted her head and the grin turned genuine, and a bit pleading, "What do ye say?"

But before Sesshomaru could give an answer, though he really wasn't quite sure of one at the time, Inuyasha suddenly stirred and struggled to free himself from the blanket trapping him. Kaede blinked and slowly released him.

Yasha sat there, shaking his head and rubbing his snout with the back of his paw, and sniffed the air. His back stiffened and his sleepy eyes widened. Then with a drugged effort, the hanyou pup sauntered over to his older brother and nearly collapsed.

Everyone in the room jumped, even Sesshomaru, but the dog caught himself.

He then sunk his teeth into Sesshomaru's pant leg and lightly tugged on it, never keeping his gaze away from his brother's face.

The demon furrowed his brows and titled his head, _"What is it, little brother?"_

Inuyasha's legs slipped out from under him and he slumped to his side, releasing his old on the cloth, his voice was thick and soft, _"Naraku…coming…protect pack…please…"_

Sesshomaru's eyes widened before they hardened into a flaming glare, without saying a word he gently picked up the dog and held him close with one hand.

Everyone's jaws in the room dropped, when they saw…it was his left arm. **(Or was it the right that got chopped off...I forgot...)**

The dog demon stood up and gripped his sword. He met everyone's eyes…and spoke in monotone. "Naraku is coming."

Nothing else had to be said.

As everyone quickly grabbed their weapons, hearts racing with adrenaline, Sesshomaru headed outside to wait in the street, depicting which way the bastard was coming from.

No one questioned if he was to help.

When Miroku was about to head out himself, he noticed Kaede drawing out her bow and arrow. He frowned and grabbed her shoulder, "Lady Kaede, are you sure?"

She met him face to face, determination in the age old lines, "Yes, Child. He has stolen something precious from us. I am going to make him pay along with the rest of ye."

Miroku swallowed and slowly smiled, though his heart hurt inside, "Yes…we'll make him pay for the pain he has wrought. This will be the day. It's going to end now."

Sango, Shippo, Kagome and Kirara walked up to meet them, hands trembling for whatever reason: fear, excitement. It didn't matter.

They all had the same thing in mind.

Revenge.

Justice.

Today was going to be the day.

The end.

They walked up the narrow street, away from the well and the Goshinboku Tree, the path they always took when starting out on another day of shard hunting…in the old days anyway…in complete silence.

Nothing had to be said.

No questions, no plans, no pep talks, no goodbyes. They were a group on a mission, a grisly gory mission; they knew may not end well.

But it _was_ going to be the end.

Nobody said a word on as to why Sesshomaru brought Yasha with them. He could be no aid in battle, but the pack knew…Yasha wouldn't allow waiting back at the hut.

He was a dog, but a smart and stubborn one.

He would have found a way to get to this battle.

No matter what.

Kagome watched with a tiny smile on how gently Sesshomaru held the pup. The demon must have thought no one noticed, but whenever the dog whimpered, Sesshomaru would give a soft growling noise, settling Yasha back down into a peaceful sleep.

It was cute and she found herself comfortable with having Sesshomaru there with them.

He had an aura of cool strength, of honor and loyalty unbendable as steel, Inuyasha had had that too. But with more heat and fire, of passion.

Kagome looked up at the hidden sky and sent up a small prayer. **_Watch over us. _**

She didn't know what else to say.

Her mind was numb of all things, she could hardly think ahead on what would happen in this battle.

Would they win? Would someone else die?

The questions were there but they lied frozen.

Her feet moved on their own accord, her fingers fluttered over her bow with a mind of their own, lifting and pulling an arrow and sliding the string to hitch at the end. Shippo's weight on her shoulder was comforting, his warmth billowing out and caressing her clammy cheek.

Suddenly her heart ached and hiccupped on the prospect of this being his last day on Earth. He was only a little pup. A child. He shouldn't be there, watching this, participating in it. That wasn't right.

But she didn't have the courage to tell him to leave.

He had a right to be there.

He had been there since the beginning.

Eyes watched them silently from windows and doors, flower petals blew across the wind to settle at their feet. Small children huddled to their mother's bosoms, and men clung to their wives.

No words.

She felt alone.

This might be the last day of her life, she realized. Her last moment on this plane. Kagome then pictured her family back through that well. How would they know…if she died in this battle? Would they end up living their lives…waiting? Forever on, questions and pleas choking in their throats?

And what if…she was the only survivor?

That terrified her more than anything.

Sesshomaru stopped.

Everyone did in suit.

The village was left far behind.

It would be certain that the fighting did not reach there.

The grass quivered and blew hither in every direction, the fog began to lift and dissipate (as if fleeing the upcoming blood bath), storm clouds roiled and thundered angrily.

There was that hush of silence…of waiting.

Kagome could just hear a clock ticking, in time with her heartbeat.

Shippo shivered, the movement going straight down her nerve endings.

One more prayer, or more like a silent message flittered across her mind. **_I love you all. _**

She began to count.

One….

Swords were withdrawn, the field, their gravesite, reflected in the metal.

Two…

Wood cracked, arrows were aimed, ready, trembling…

Three…

Patience.

Silence.

There was asmall gasp in her left ear. Her heart answered Shippo's exclaim, the tattoo nearly flying from her chest as she heard it as well.

Laughter.

From the corner of her eye, she saw Miroku grasp the prayer beads sealing his hand. Sango sank on her knees, ready to spring. Two small ears twitched from the bundle in Sesshomaru's arms.

It became louder.

The wind howled, picked up speed.

Lightning streaked across the sky.

From before them, a huge explosion rocked the ground; they managed to cover their eyes from the smoke and flames, keeping their feet and stature.

It ended, and they blinked their eyes open, tears clinging to the corners, ears ringing from a terrible cackle filling the air.

Hair stood on end, fingers tightened, teeth grinded, and they glared at the despicable creature before them; tentacles dancing over the crater the blast had created.

It pulled its slimy body over and raised its head. The baboon mask met them with hollow eyes, and its white fur ruffled in the storm's winds.

Another bout of laughter, and a sick greasy voice, low, deep, graveled with humor, tightend the air, "Well, well, well….hello. I have so missed you all. How have your lives been while I've been away?"

Kagome stomped her foot and shot her arrow, narrowly missing the half man's smirking and concealed face. "Shut the hell up, Naraku! And get ready to pay for what you've done!"

Naraku howld and shook his head, the earth still rumbling from the noise of his mirth, "Silly girl, you are no match for me. If I was able to destroy your precious Inuyasha, I will have no trouble ringing the life from all of you." He turned his head and grinned, "Ah, Sesshomaru, I see you have come to join the fun as well. How delightful."

Rage flickered in the dog demon's golden eyes, but his voice was cool as ever, "I am going to rip you to pieces Naraku. That…is a promise."

"Oh, Sesshomaru, are you not happy for what I have done for you? Your younger brother is finally gone from this world. Should you not be thanking me?"

Sesshomaru growled and tightened his arm, hiding Yasha's view, "You bastard! I—"

"What, Sesshomaru? Don't tell me you _miss_ your little Inuyasha? Why, I thought you wanted to kill him? What has become of the cold heartless demon that used to ravage these lands?" Naraku lowered himself, spreading out his many tentacles. From behind him, on a huge snow white feather, watched Kagura and Kanna, merely enjoying the spectacle.

Sesshoamru walked forward and placed himself in front of Kagome, Shippo and the rest of Inuyasha's pack. That proved to be quite hilarious to the disgusting bastard readying for battle.

"Now this is just grand. Inuyasha I hope you are watching this from hell as we speak. For your loyal friends, have already replaced you with your older brother! This is proving to be fairly entertaining." His whole body shook with his amusement.

And it didn't end there, but the laughter got even more loud and abrasive when Yasha leapt out in front of Sesshoamru and growled, showing off his puny fangs.

Naraku could hardly speak, his voice half strangled, "My, my, is that to be your secret weapon? Are you to destroy me with a little…puppy?"

Heat flushed everyone's cheeks and Yasha's hair stood on end, ears laid back.

_

* * *

You Goddamn bastard! I'm going to make you eat your wor—_Inuyasha's vision of Naraku suddenly distorted and fuzzed. His throat blocked off and white exploded before his eyes. _Wha--?_

_**Son. It is time. **_

Gravity left him. And fire spurted through his veins. Inuyasha, blind and immobile, could hardly think through the pain.

_Fa…ther…ahh!_

_**Yes, son, it is me. You have done well. I am very proud of you. You have been quite patient…and now…the wait is over. **_

His throat vibrated with a howl, but no sound reached his ears.

_**I apologize for the pain earlier, my boy, I'm afraid it won't be going away any time soon. **_

_What are you…do you mean…?_

_**Yes, son. Your body is done and ready for you. **_

_Now? You people have rotten…ugh...timing!_

A chuckle distracted him momentarily from another burst of lacing pain.

_**That is true, I suppose. We tried to do it while you were safe in the present but…complications arose. Your body was not fully…capable of holding your soul. It still needed a few adjustments. Sorry about that.**_

Inuyasha writhed and swallowed back screams, floundering around trying to pierce the white cloak surrounding him. He couldn't see, he could hardly move.

_This really…isn't the best, ah, time! If you didn't notice…Naraku—_

_**We know son, do not fret. You'll be fine. By the way, your mate Kagome has seemed to have forgotten your sword. Luckily, we have means of transportation. It'll be waiting for you when you awaken. **_

_Father, I—_

**_Shush, son. Go to sleep, if you stay conscious the pain will be excruciating. Now stop arguing. And be sure to kick that bastard's ass for all of us up here. Your momma says she loves you and good luck. Make us proud, boy._**

_Papa…_

But before he could utter another word, black exploded in the white and draped down before his eyes, wrapping around him like warm vines and dragging him down…down, down, down…he wasn't even aware of when consciousness left him.

Once he was in a deep slumber, the transformation took place.

* * *

What in the name of the seven hells was going on? 

One moment, Naraku was quivering with laughter at the growling pup in front of him…and then all of sudden; a bright light engulfed the area.

In his dazed mind, when blinking his vision clear, Sesshomaru had thought that bastard had done another blast. And it terrified him when he looked at the place where Inuyasha was a moment ago…to find him gone…

But with some odd stroke of subconscious he tilted his head upward, squinting his eyes on seeing a glowing sphere circling above them.

Deep within the ball of light was a shadow, a figure distorted and hovering in midair. It seemed to bend and pull, spinning in dizzying circles.

A small voice whispered in his mind.

It was Inuyasha.

_**The time is now. **_

Sesshomaru then became aware of a ghostly howl ringing low and strong, a wolf's call, a dog's shriek of pain. It became higher, more human, losing the canine quality until…it was his brother's voice, that scream he had heard many times before during battle calls or when injured.

His eyes widened, _his brother was gaining his body back. _

Well, what a stroke of luck.

And perfect timing.

Without thinking he walked forward, sheathed his sword and called forth air and water, to create a cloud at his feet. He never kept his eyes off the shadowed light when he floated up towards it. When he grew closer, the figure of his little brother's: body back arched, head flung back, arms and legs stretched outward, became clearer.

Sesshomaru became level with him, and took off the outer thick layer of his kimono, reaching and draping it over Inuyasha's hazy chest. He shielded his eyes, and quickly tied the cloth in place, noting how it nearly engulfed the smaller demon boy. When it covered him and was tied securely, it was like someone had snapped their fingers. The light snuffed out and gravity took hold.

Inuyasha, human…_hanyou…_paw-less, snout-less, and _tail-_less, slumped into Sesshomaru's arms.

His head flung uselessly, arms flopped without control, and the older demon saw with baited breath…that his chest was not rising.

He moved him into a comfortable position, supporting the hanyou's neck and knees, and waited…Sesshomaru counted his, own, heartbeats, willing air into his brother's lungs.

Another snap of someone's fingers and out of nowhere Inuyasha arched, eyes popped open, and he gasped for his first breathe. Sesshomaru smiled when a furious heartbeat reached his ears, and he tightened his hold on his younger brother when he thrashed, eyes tearing, mouth gaping, gulping hungrily at oxygen.

The hanyou then slowly calmed, and closed his eyes, drinking in air and starting to shiver, snuggling into Sesshomaru's kimono, warm with his body heat.

His breathing was the next thing to slow, growing deep as sleep started to invade. Sesshomaru started to head back down to earth.

But before his feet met ground, the forgotten Naraku struck at him with a snarl of rage, "NO! You're supposed to be **_dead_**! Why in the hell are you still alive? I saw you die, I killed you myself, what is going on?"

Sesshomaru, in a flash, supported Inuyasha with one arm, and blocked the attack with his unsheathed sword with the other. He growled, eyes flaring red, and dodged another fling of those tentacles. Naraku continued to rant and scream.

"You let him go this instant! Let me kill him, I'll be certain to do it right this time! AAAGGGHHH!" Sesshomaru had successfully dismantled one of his many arms, green ooze smearing the dog-demon's cheek.

"You will not, Naraku. I will not allow you to kill him again." He jumped, spun, and released a brilliant arc of energy, electricity and flaming power smacking Naraku across the chest.

As he waited for Naraku to recover, a whimper caught his attention and he looked down at Inuyasha trying to awaken. "Do not rise, little brother. There is no need."

The hanyou answered in the canine tongue, _"Have to…protect…ugh…why am I so sore?"_

Sesshomaru chuckled, "Why do you not try speaking Inuyasha, I believe you shall find your voice. As for your soreness…well…that is to be expected, I suppose."

Inuyasha's brows lowered into a 'v', and he slowly opened his eyes a tiny miniscule fraction, he blinked and terror clouded the pale orbs. _"I…I can't see…"_

Sesshomaru frowned and jumped back as a flying ball of miasma flew through the air, "I would not worry, Inuyasha. I believe you are just not yet fully equipped to your new body. Give it time."

"_Uhh….n-new body?"_

"Yes, little brother. Welcome back." Sesshomaru smiled and spun to the side, spouting out another electrical strike of his sword. He was feeling mighty….light and chipper at the moment. Now why could that be?

The hanyou swallowed a few times, his mouth dry and sore, and slowly….trying to squash his hope, foolishly trying to rise…spoke. "Big…brother…?" His throat contracted in pain, raw, and raspy with disuse. But it soon grew less troublesome, and his lips stretched into a grin. "Oh, damn…it's my voice…I can talk! Thank God!" he laughed gently, but the mirth dissipated when his ears (the ringing that filled them, starting to edge off) twitched with another one of Naraku's battle cry, laced in increasing frustration.

The black curtain over his vision started to fuzz gray and then colors spun into view. Inuyasha blinked, groaning by how lightheaded and dizzy it was making him feel to try to focus. "Sessho…what the…hell is going on?" His body was going to take its own sweet time to gain his eyesight back.

Damn.

Well, at least he could hear.

Sesshomaru's voice was calm, normal, but it had a warm undertone to it that Inuyasha couldn't really explain. He was…a little tired, slow in thinking, but not like before. "There is one person who is not very happy on your return, I'm afraid."

Inuyasha smirked, "Let me just guess…" His words cut off when Sesshomaru was too slow on dodging an attack and groaned by a slash in his side. The smell of blood plugged Inuyasha's nostrils. He growled and with blind eyes, looked in all possible directions, "Are you alright?"

His brother's response was tense, "Fine, now shut up. You're distracting me."

Inuyasha ground his teeth, "No, put me down. I need to get my sword."

Sesshomaru twisted around and slashed another attack before answering, "I'm afraid not, little brother. If you have forgotten, you are blind and unable to move. I don't suppose you can even walk."

"I could walk just fine. Now dammit, put me down and let me help you. You can't defeat Naraku while carrying me!"

"I can very well do anything, Inuyasha! Now quit with your futile works on an argument and lay still!" Sesshomaru growled and bore his fangs down at the bleary eyed hanyou. It was faint, but Inuyasha could almost see the gleaming points of his teeth.

Grudgingly he settled down, and relaxed his muscles. Gritting his teeth in frustration, Inuyasha waited impatiently for his soul to "get in one" with his new body.

New body. Damn! It was good to be back. But he'd celebrate later.

With salty tears cleaning out his eye sockets, Inuyasha mumbled under his breath, feeling the answering aura of power and strength tingling in his heart and sword hand, "Tetsusaiga, come to me now."

His entire body sung with calling, a magnet to the spirit of his trusty sword, unbeknownst to the hanyou, but which was flying low in the grass towards him in record speed.

Where it had been, or how it had gotten there, was Tetsusaiga's little secret.

It hummed in satisfaction and greeting when it landed in Inuyasha's outstretched hand.

"It's good to see you two," and with ignoring his brother's protest, Inuyasha back flipped and landed on the ground…wobbling a bit when his leg muscles tingled from the exertion. The hanyou hurriedly wiped his eyes, rubbing them for good measure and was awarded with bright clear vision, a pissed off Naraku being the first thing he saw.

The demon snarled once more, "Why are you still alive? You're supposed to be dead!"

Inuyasha smirked and stepped forward, being sure to keep his steps straight and unwavering. His older brother watched him in fascination and surprise and….Inuyasha wasn't sure…but…pride? He shook his head and concentrated on the bastard before him, lifting up his sword, he laughed with malicious intent, "Well, Naraku I guess that shows you can never get rid of me…even in death. Oh…and by the way…hell has a special spot…just for you! Say hi to Satan for me!"

And with that, Inuyasha jumped high into the air and brought down his sword, right smack dab between Naraku's eyeballs, the Wind Scar rushed and swirled all across the valley, mixing with the final disturbing shriek…of that mangy bastard.

When the wind and light dissipated, long fork grooves, a mile long, marred the earth in every direction. And where Naraku had once been, was a big pile of soot and ash.There was nothing left….except…

For a mangled puppet, wooden pieces scattered around the dirt and smoldering flames.

In disappointment, Inuyasha landed on the ground and sheathed his sword, tying the hilt around his waist. He sighed and meshed his bangs, "Ah, dammit! Why is it always a puppet! He actually killed me with one of those stupid things! When did they get so strong?" He crossed his arms with a pout and glared at the ground. "Dammit to hell. I was hoping I finally killed him. That would have been so sweet, perfect pay back!"

He jumped by a sudden chuckle and a slap on the shoulder, "Do not be too disappointed, little brother, you'll get him sooner or later. Now I must say, for only being in your normal body for a good ten minutes, you did that Wind Scar flawlessly."

An _extremely_ big understatement…but Inuyasha was shocked.

A grin slowly spread across his face, "Really? Thanks!" suddenly light headedness overtook him and he bobbed to and fro, "Oh…but I think I might have done too much too soon….ah, shit…" before he hit the ground, hands grabbed him, and Sesshomaru took one of his arms and pulled it across the back of his neck, supporting Inuyasha to his shaky feet. He smiled, eyelids drooping, "Uh, thanks…"

Sesshomaru frowned and straightened, before answering, a small lift to the corner of his mouth, "Your welcome." Slowly he turned and helped Inuyasha walk back…to frozen pack members. Their eyes were huge, glassy with unshed tears, mouths were gaping, and their legs appeared ready to collapse beneath them.

Inuyasha bit his lip, "Ah, man…I got a lot of work ahead of me don't I?"

Sesshomaru seemed confused at first before glancing over to his brother's shocked stupor friends, he nodded, "I'm afraid so…it will take some time for them to…accept this. Humans are….quite fragile creatures."

Inuyasha snorted, "You have no idea. It took me _forever_ just to get them to stop crying."

Sesshomaru smirked, "That must have been uncomfortable for you."

The hanyou smiled and shook his head, "At first I guess, but now I'm used to it. Good thing to….I think there's going to be….a _lot_ of crying pretty soon."

The older demon sighed, a slight exaggeration, Inuyasha laughed. "You don't have to stay you know. I'm a little shocked you're helping me in the first place."

"Well…since you have already died….it would be…hmm…stupid, I suppose could be the word, to do so again. So…what else am I to do?"

Inuyasha blinked, a little stunned by how Sesshomaru was acting, and even _more_ stunned…by how quickly he was getting used to it. He found himself smiling, "Well…grab your companions, that creepy toad thing and I think….Rin, right? That cute little human girl that follows you around?"

He laughed harder by the almost unnoticeable blush tingeing Sesshomaru's pale cheeks.

"Yeah, Rin, that's right. Go find her, and head back to the village. I have been stuck eating dog food for weeks, I need Ramen and maybe a deer! We'll have a celebration!" When they neared closer to his pack, Kaede fell to her knees, and Sango gripped to Miroku like a life line. Kagome looked about ready to run for it.

Inuyasha sighed, "But I guess…I have some stuff to do before then."

He removed his arm and Sesshomaru released him to stand on his own two feet.

The hanyou took one step forward and crossed his arms, giving a full blown cocky smirk.

"And what the hell is wrong with you guys? You all look like you've just seen a ghost."

* * *

**I know that's a bit OOC, but come ON people...it's ME! **

**And now...time to party! YES! YES! YES!  
**

**I DID IT! I did it, I did it, I...DID...IT!**

**HE HAS HIS BODY BACK! YEAH! It took...FOREVER! **

**But...I DID IT!**

**Now, I order you all...TO REVIEW!**

**And to check out my bud's forums. **

**JA NE!**

**Pause...**

**Takes deep breath**

**I DID IT!**

* * *


	16. Doubt, Desperation, Hope&Love

_**I was filled with determination. **_

_**I WILL FINISH THIS STORY!**_

_**No more updates on TSH or the redone one. NOT UNTIL THIS IS THROUGH! Only one more chapter after this and then...WHALAH!**_

_**shakes fist**_

_**I will finish this. **_

_**BELIEVE IT!**_

**

* * *

**

**Always There**

**Chapter 16**

* * *

It wasn't true.

It wasn't real.

Kagome shook her head and shadows started to eat away at the edges of her vision.

He wasn't there.

With the extent of her shock, consciousness began to ebb away but the miko fought against it desperately. She couldn't keep her eyes off of…

_The illusion. _

_The trick. _

_It's not real, he's trying to, he's…h-he's…_

She let out a jagged breath and her lips pulled back in pain. Tears—there had been so many, will they ever just _stop?—_spilled without her notice. She couldn't look away. She couldn't finish the thought.

They were too horrible to bear. Would anyone be that cruel?

Naraku would.

It wasn't real.

Panic welled up in her chest when Inuyasha—_no, **no! TRICK! It's not REAL! No, no, no!—**_held her gaze and took a step forward. Kagome's head wobbled from side to side and she repeated that word over and over again.

"No….no…."

His amber eyes, so vivid and bright, so…_awful!_ They were so perfect and that was just so…

They made her heart hurt.

They made her think of…

Life draining, blood spilling, and her cold quivering fingers shutting them forever.

_**NO!**_

He whispered her name. _IT_ spoke her name again, concern so evident. That was just another clue, another reason why this wasn't happening! Her Inuyasha would have never been so open with his concern, right? Her Inuyasha wouldn't hold his hand out for her, _right?_

"Oh…n-nooooo…" she groaned, hugging herself tight, continuing to shake her head and walking backwards.

_I-I've lost it. I've finally lost my sanity. It's happened…I've gone completely crazy…_

_I'm seeing him again. And he looks so real…no…_

How dare her imagination fool her like this! How dare it be…so good…better than those times before!

Her mind had remembered every little detail; the harsh line of his jaw, the angle of his nose and cheekbones, the unconscious twitch of his ears, and his _eyes_.

His eyes were the best by far. They were perfect and so…awful…

He came closer.

Her stupor snapped.

And Kagome screamed.

"NO! _You're not here!"_

She spun, and stumbled harshly to the ground. Pain pricked, and blood oozed, but Kagome noticed neither. Time could not keep up with the frantic shrieking of her mind.

_**RUN! HE'S NOT REAL! INUYASHA'S DEAD! RUN**! **RUN! RUN!**_

And she, without hesitation, did just that.

Kagome ran.

Inuyasha stood dumbstruck.

He had day dreamed frequently on what would happen when he reunited with his pack in his original form.

But this had not been it.

Heh, far from it!

Inuyasha watched, his heart flattening by pressure, on Kagome's limping form. Her shrill cry of agony still rang in his mind.

And he had seen fear in those eyes.

That was the most difficult part.

Kagome had been afraid of him.

His thoughts still centered on his love, he couldn't quite understand why suddenly he was looking over at Sango. She appeared to be saying something, yelling was a more operative word. And she seemed very angry.

But there was fear on her face as well.

This wasn't going the way he had wanted it.

Muffled and distorted, his brain tried to soak in the taijiya's words.

"You bastard!"

Hey…Miroku was holding her back for some reason…and she was struggling pretty hard…

Inuyasha finally began to shake off this weird daze—he'd deal with Kagome soon--and realized…Miroku was trying to prevent Sango from attacking him!

_What the…?_

"You bastard! You cruel, heartless, scum! Why do you find joy in other people's pain? You sick, conniving…_stop it!"_

Inuyasha blinked and his breath hitched.

What the…had he done something wrong?

"Sango…"

"Don't say my name!" she screamed and droplets of tears flew around her. Inuyasha's jaws snapped closed. "Stop torturing us…you've already won, got it? You don't need to do this anymore…just stop it…"

Sango started to sob and her strength drained away causing her to sag against Miroku's hold.

"Stop it…stop this…"

Shippo hopped on the woman's shoulder, hugging her neck, glaring forthright at the hanyou. "Y-yeah…aren't you satisfied? STOP IT!"

Inuyasha furrowed his brows, his good ol' temper beginning to flare.

Now wait just a minute! He was back from the dead. Shouldn't they be happy?

He turned to seek help form his brother but Sesshomaru had vanished. His irritation grew.

_Oh yeah thanks, leave me to fend for myself why don't ya?_

Inuyasha yelped when pain split in his temple. He whirled around to see Kaede, red faced, and crying too! She still held her bow in the air, ready to strike again.

"How dare ye! How cruel can one be? Haven't ye enjoyed our suffering enough?"

"What the hell are you—"

"Shut up you bastard!" Sango ripped off one of the monk's arms and tried to get at her concealed katana. "I'll make you pay! For killing Inuyasha and then pretending to be him! Naraku, you have gone way too far! DIE!"

And then she shrugged free from Miroku's grasp. Shippo bounded off just in time as Sango barreled towards Inuyasha, sword glinting aloft in her arm, ready to stab and kill.

Inuyasha's body seemed to be entangled in jello. His movements to defend himself were sluggish. She was going to kill him…or at least try her damn best at it! And to take the cake…everyone thought he was his worst enemy!

Talk about cutting a guy down.

Sango let out a mighty roar, lifting the weapon higher, aiming for the vulnerability of his throat…but having Miroku's staff whipping around and being pulled back against her stomach, causing her to grunt out her last breath, drop the sword, and collapse against the man's chest…didn't quite get the sword to it's destination.

But that's nothing to feel bad about, really.

Inuyasha, arms still halfway up to cover his face, stared at the gasping woman with stunned eyes.

Everyone else was staring at Miroku.

"W-why…why did ye do that Miroku?" Kaede spoke, her voice thin and wispy. She was backing away from the hanyou, and there was terror on her face as she nervously glanced in Inuyasha's direction. "Do ye not know what is happening? Naraku has disguised himself as Inuyasha… he's trying to…"

"Lady Kaede," Miroku grunted, lowering his staff to the ground and wrapping his arms around Sango's form, who was still trying to regain her breath. "Do you not realize that he has not attacked us yet? He hasn't done anything remotely—"

"He's going to get us when we're sleeping!" Shippo shrieked, tears running down his face. "He's trying to trick us!"

Inuyasha instinctively took a step back, arms still tense, when he saw the murder in Sango's glassy eyes, "Oi, did you guys hit your heads or something? In case you haven't noticed…I kind of destroyed that bastard with my wind Scar!"

"Stop playing this little game…we know who you are!"

"Yeah, I'm—"

"Yasha."

Inuyasha briskly nodded to Miroku, "Exactly." He blinked, "Hey, wait…"

All eyes fixed on the monk again. Miroku was staring at Inuyasha with a narrowed look, as if peering right through to his core.

Sure the hell was nerve-wracking. Inuyasha tried not to squirm.

"What are ye saying?"

Shippo was the only one who moved, running over to Kaede and clutching a shivering paw to her kimono.

They all waited.

Miroku slowly stepped away from Sango, now sitting on her rump, rubbing her bruised middle absentmindedly. The monk glared at Inuyasha and stepped towards him.

Inuyasha found that he was frozen. He couldn't fairly well attack one of his own companions. And he wasn't sure if he should run. Not like that was an option anyway, he wasn't scared of his own pack! That was ridiculous.

It was just…not everything was really connected in his head right now. Things were getting pretty confusing for the poor boy.

So the hanyou stood there, leaning back a bit, eyeing the approaching monk cautiously.

Miroku stopped a few inches in front of him. The glare never softened.

Out of no where, the monk punched Inuyasha's head.

"OW! Hey, what the hell was that for?"

"For being so damn cocky! It's not everyday that your friend comes back from the dead! You need to practice subtlety, Inuyasha, I swear to you." Inuyasha rubbed his head and straightened to his feet.

"Well what the hell am I supposed to do? Hug everyone? Sango tried to stab me!"

Miroku crossed his arms and shouted, "We all witnessed your murder, Inuyasha! What do you expect? Naraku has all deceived us before, why shouldn't we think he'd try at it again?"

"I, well, dammit, Miroku you didn't have to hit me so hard!" Inuyasha growled. What was he supposed to say to that? Naraku was using Sango's own brother against her, and let's not mention all the other number of crap he had pulled; it was highly understandable to think that he would try something as heartless as pretending to be their hanyou friend reborn.

But still…come on!

Miroku's mouth twitched. "I did not strike you that hard, Inuyasha. Has the days of being a puppy gotten you that soft?"

"W-wait…a puppy…are you saying…Yasha he…?"

Miroku tilted his head so his voice could reach his stock stiff companions behind him. "Yes, the Yasha that we had become so accustomed to have around…was our very own _Inu_yasha."

Now, on their travels there had been stranger happenings. So it wasn't that hard for them to accept this…

Well, kind of.

Kaede's eyes widened, "That is absurd, Miroku, and you know it. I-if a dog could be…no, it's more likely Naraku…"

Their puppy flying up into the air, transforming, and then in his place…could it really be?

Inuyasha snorted, "For the last time…_I am not Naraku_!"

No one paid him any attention. Inuyasha bit the inside of his cheek in aggravation.

Sango had the same ghostly look on her face as the old woman's as she whispered, "B-but it can't be…Inuyasha…you're…he's dead…we saw him…you…you **_died!"_** she clambered to her feet, "It can't be true. You died, Inuyasha! You lost your arm…a-and…all that b-blood…it can't be you…"

Miroku turned to the struggling taijiya, his expression soft, "It is, Sango. I know it's hard to believe. But I'm sure Inuyasha can explain it all."

The monk's words had a calming affect and the hanyou found even his temper had cooled. He grunted, "Yeah, its one hell of a story. But I'll have to tell it later. That damn girl just ran of into the forest! She'll most likely get picked off for a late snack if I don't go get her."

He didn't have time to deal with this right now! They deserved an explanation but…

Miroku smiled, "Then you better go get her."

In turn a smirk started to grow on Inuyasha's face and he nodded, beginning to raise his leg to dash off when a weight landed on his foot.

"W-wait!" cried a small cracked voice. Inuyasha looked down at Shippo, his short arms trying their best to wrap full around the hanyou's calve. "Wait…d-don't go…not yet…you…" there was a buzz of confusion in his emerald orbs. And the kitsune suddenly shouted out, chest snagging with air and pushed down sobs, "You have to prove it first! I need you to prove it…prove it…I need to know…that you're not…that you're papa. Oh, please don't leave me papa!"

Boulders of emotion crashed into Inuyasha all at once. He almost buckled beneath it. Hearing that broken sound of sorrow and desperate hope, feeling the small tremors in his son's fingers, and those stupid tears…hadn't he seen enough crying? Hadn't they all cried enough? The need was so powerful, Inuyasha almost wanted to beg and scream for it.

Please no more crying!

Shippo seized onto the hanyou's leg till his arms grew pale and muffled the lung jerking howls ripping from his throat into the thick kimono. He had tried to hard to be strong. Had tried to be a good leader, to be like Inuyasha; it had been so hard. And then suddenly to see his surrogate father drift down from the skies, to feel almost painful hope, and afterward waves of denial and doubt. That rising rage, thinking that Naraku would--- it had been so powerful and dark that…it frightened him!

And now, now having Miroku say…Inuyasha…didn't look…and his scent could never have been recreated so flawlessly like this…and he sure acted like him…but…

"Papa," Shippo whimpered. _I'm so confused. I don't know what to think! Papa, please…please let it be you…prove it to me… _

The kit stiffened when a warm palm was placed on his head and he jerked his chin up in surprise. Inuyasha tried to smile, but he knew it couldn't be done, not with seeing Shippo act this way. And Kagome too. Everyone, their emotions were so potent he could smell them in the air, feel them smacking him.

They had been pretty stupid hadn't they? They had traveled together for months, but had never opened up. Not enough to show their real selves. Had hardly even cracked open the lid.

Even with their grief, they had tried to keep it to themselves, deal with it on their own.

But Yasha had seen it all. All of them, one by one. And for being the kind of guy who kept to himself and disliked emotional conversations and conflicts, to be forced into seeing this side of his friends that he could have done without…

It ends up being too much.

And Inuyasha wanted it to finally stop. **_Stop it. _**

He didn't want them to hurt because of him anymore.

_**Please stop it. **_

Inuyasha knew that his heart was shining in his eyes as clear as day. His mask of indifference and anger, which he had grown so accustomed to wearing, had dropped.

He had changed a lot.

He had seen and heard a lot.

_**Please stop crying. **_

But the want was so strong, that he didn't care. He would later, pride would awaken later and he would blush, mutter something in embarrassment or maybe shout and then change the subject. But for now…

Shippo was staring up at him with such raw pain.

He had seen that in everyone's eyes, in the weeks he had been Yasha. To see it and not have the voice to make them stop, to be only able to fight against self pride and morals that had developed over years of torment and cruelty and give in to those puppy instincts and try to comfort them…erase that look…

But having it always come back when someone spoke his name or noticed his rosary or Tetsusaiga. Or wake up in the morning in cold sweat from that nightmare they all had shared. He sinking into darkness in a pool of his own blood, body shredded beyond repair.

He needed this pain to stop!

"Shippo…" Inuyasha balled his hand in the child's orange fur, "D-don't do that. Stop crying…"

"Papa…you were Yasha weren't you…you were him that night…right?"

That crack again, such desperation, Inuyasha nodded and Shippo's face crumpled. "R-really…?"

Inuyasha slowly clipped the boy's fingers from his clothes but before he could let go of Shippo's hands, his little paws tightened around his own. "Tell me! Was it you?"

Inuyasha growled trying to stay in control of those blasted emotions, trying to gain some dignity back, everyone was watching them! But the growl wouldn't grow, rumbling in his throbbing throat like a purr.

He nodded. "You still have it don't you?"

Shippo licked his lips, "What?"

He was going to destroy any doubt that could still linger, though his son's eyes were glowing in faith. He kept his voice low so only Shippo could hear, "You found it in my clothes, the little pocket on the right. You still have it don't you?"

It dawned on the kit in slow provision.

Shippo's eyes widened. _The ball! Inuyasha's ball! _

It was him for sure! No one knew about that except…

That was all that needed to be said.

His face broke into a grin and he nodded up, down, up, down, up, down, "**_PAPA!"_**

Shippo lunged and Inuyasha caught him, automatically crushing him to his chest. Who the hell cared now? He had his body and was now able to comfort Shippo properly. Those damn annoying fatherly instincts, stupid human emotions, were appeased.

Inuyasha hugged the kit tight, shutting his eyes and biting his lower lip. He listened, chest lifting in elation by Shippo's ecstatic laughing, mixed cries, and shouting of, "Papa! Papa! It's you, it's you! It's really you! Papa, I've missed you so much!"

The hanyou coughed, glanced at the wide eyed Sango and Kaede, the little smile hovering on Miroku's lips, and turned away, his white hair falling down around his shoulders, blocking their images. He fumbled into his Indian styled sitting, that felt good to do, and kept holding his boy.

Inuyasha never said a word.

Didn't expect he could.

And that was kind of funny, hadn't he wished he could speak all those horrible nights when he was a dog?

Of course, he was always bad with words.

Inuyasha sighed and stroked Shippo's hair.

_I guess…_

Silence was the best policy.

After a few moments, after Shippo's breathing started to go back to normal, Inuyasha stood up and started to walk over to Miroku. He head was bowed and his body already felt emotionally drained.

But there was still Kagome…

He stopped walking and felt a sudden warm load on his shoulder; Inuyasha cocked his head to the side and grinned. "Hi Kirara, where had you gotten off to?" he rasped.

The neko mewed and licked his cheek, rubbing her soft head along his neck. **_You were a tad busy. I didn't want to get involved. _**

Having grown so accustomed to speaking with Kirara over the past weeks, he smirked and said, "You were just chicken."

Then it hit him…

He could still speak to Kirara. Inuyasha's eyes widened and wakefulness swept back into his body as he whipped his head to look at the cat. "Hey I just…"

_**Don't you have someone to go find?**_

Inuyasha blinked several times and then decided to push it away. Could have been a gift, or a side affect, maybe that little pup's little instincts and skills were still in him, but this wasn't important now. The cat was right.

But he could admit it; it was nice to still be able to converse with Kirara.

"Papa? Who are you talking to?"

Inuyasha shook his head and gruffly said, "Don't worry about it." And he dropped the kit into Miroku's arms.

Shippo emitted a tiny shriek and scuttled around, trying to gain footing to jump back to Inuyasha. "Hey, w-wait!"

Inuyasha shot him a look and the kit immediately froze. The hanyou's features softened, "Stay here, 'kay? I'll be back." He waited a beat and added, "Really."

Shippo searched his face and finally nodded. "Okay."

"Be gentle, Inuyasha. Kagome's had it the hardest." Miroku said.

Inuyasha nodded, eyes glazing over, "I know." He turned but once again…someone stopped him.

"Yasha…"

"Child…"

Sango and Kaede spoke at the same time. There was still so much that needed to be explained. They had strange lives, but this was a little more than anyone could handle. But apparently the father-son moment had broken a bit of theirs doubts.

Still…

If Inuyasha left…

They would build up again. Their minds would have time to come up with another reasonable explanation, in order to protect themselves if…this wasn't what it seemed.

But he didn't have time. At this very moment Kagome could…

"_Kill me!"_

Inuyasha shook his head. "I'll be back." Their mouths closed. Their hands were still trembling. The look in their eyes weren't gone yet, but merely hidden behind a cloud of confusion. But he didn't have time. "Miroku?"

"Yes?"

The hanyou's insides were twisting with tension and energy. He had to get going. "Just…don't let Sango have the sword okay?"

The monk stared at him in shock.

_Did he just…_

_He just made a joke. _

His lips twisted up and his eyes watered…

Miroku burst out laughing.

And out of nowhere, wrapped that blasted hanyou in a one armed savage hug.

Inuyasha went ram rod straight. "Oi, what the—" Miroku was still laughing and he didn't notice the choking Shippo struggling to get freed. "Le'go!"

The monk patted the hanyou's back and did just that, wiping his streaming face. "Okay, I'm sorry, I just….oh hell, get out of here!" He chuckled and pushed Inuyasha's shoulder.

The hanyou kept up his appearance of agitation and then finally allowed the smile to break free.

After that something extraordinary happened.

Inuyasha laughed.

He ran off to the direction of the forest before seeing his pack's astounded faces.

Once the hanyou had disappeared beyond the trees, Sango and Kaede turned to Miroku. Shippo was on the man's shoulders, hugging Kirara and grinning like a fool.

"Miroku…Yasha he…when he…did he really…?"

The monk turned and Sango's heart felt full and heavy, seeing such full blown happiness on Miroku's face. Something she had yearned to see for so long. And there was that old twinkle in his eyes again too. Suddenly Miroku leaned forward and kissed Sango lightly on the lips. Her eyes widened and she pushed against his chest, "H-hey, why did you--?"

"He kept his promise Sango."

She stared at him and soon…

By those whispered words…

The taijiya started to cry.

* * *

Why did she cry so much?

Shouldn't she be dry? Shouldn't she be empty of all emotion now?

Why did she have to be so emotional? She couldn't even count the number of times she had cried, most of them being Inuyasha's fault.

_Inuyasha…_

That one word and it all rushed back at her. Kagome's insides went cold and rigid, her heart started to pound harsh against her ribs, and the world started to tilt and blur.

"Stop…not again. Calm down, old girl. You're okay. It was just…" she sniffed. "It was just a dream. You fell asleep or got a bonk on the head. You didn't see Yasha being pulled up into the air like on those alien movies and seeing…"

Kagome yelped and held her head, pulling in her knees against her chest.

_No, no, no. That didn't happen. I bet Yasha is just fine. He's with Miroku and Sango and…they're probably playing. Yeah, playing fetch or something. _

_But Naraku…_

_You were fighting Naraku. Sesshomaru had been there, he had been carrying Yasha. And he was sick, Yasha was sick. Then Naraku came…Yasha jumped down and…and he started to glow…_

"No, it didn't happen! I'm just losing my mind that's all, that's all." Kagome laughed a hysterical little chuckle. "Y-yeah, just going crazy, a normal day, my love is dead, my puppy got beamed up onto a space ship…and I'm…I'm going to sit here and keep telling myself that it didn't happen."

_It was Naraku…and if it was…he's probably killing Sango, Kaede and everyone right now! _

Terror exploded and the girl jumped to her feet, swallowing a scream.

_He's probably killing Shippo right now!_

"No! What am I doing here? I have to get back, I have to protect…I won't let that bastard kill any more of my loved ones!" Kagome grabbed her bow and cluster of arrows, swinging them on her back, picking up her feet to run. Her tears started to dry as determination bubbled and she forcibly pushed back at her insanity, of those thoughts and images.

_I'm not going to let Naraku…_

A blur fell from the trees and landed in front of her, forcing her to slide to a stop. The world seemed to rock and boom and Kagome's eyes widened, her grip loosened, arrows and her bow clattered to the grass.

"No!"

Inuyasha stood there, his older brother's outer kimono hanging down to his knees, flapping in the wind, and his arms were crossed, his expression hard and indomitable. She fell to her knees.

"No…"

Something flickered in his—_perfect…awful!—_eyes but they quickly were buried under that glare. He took a step forward. She crawled frantically back.

"Stop." He commanded and Kagome's muscles went solid.

_No, move, move, it's Naraku, he's already killed your family and now he's going to kill you! Move, girl, MOVE! What are you doing?_

But she couldn't. The miko could only sit there, her legs scraped and bloody, her clothes ripped and covered in dirt. She sat there, trembling like some cornered, clipped bird waiting for the wolf to pounce and snap its jaws.

Inuyasha didn't pounce. He stood, staring down at her with that stony face and minutes clicked by.

Slowly, her mind whispered as Kagome's eyes flicked unwillingly across the hanyou's body: _He…he has two arms. And his chest is healed…it's smooth and flat…he has two eyes…his hair is thick and full. It couldn't be him. He's just like before…it's not him…_

"Kagome."

That ruff tone filled her with warmth, almost burying the fear it also brought, and Kagome's eyes went back to his. She was no longer in control of her own body.

She was going to die.

But she had prayed for that, screamed and begged it to the heavens…hadn't she?

"Kagome…I'm not going to let you run anymore."

Like she could, her legs had turned into jelly, weak and brittle as rotten branches. Kagome licked her lips and sniffed.

The harsh contours of his glare began to melt away and Inuyasha took another step forward. Kagome flinched and he stopped. But she hadn't run that was a good sign. A little bit of fear was still there though, fear and doubt and sorrow. That had to go.

_Be gentle…_

"I'm not going to let you push me away."

Another step.

"S-stop…" she whimpered. Kagome's chocolate brown eyes glistened. "Don't come any closer…"

Inuyasha refused her request. "I'm going to make you stop crying…dammit. You've cried too much."

She looked up at his tall, straight form. "Y-you…it can't be you…I've gone insane…y-you're…"

"Don't say it." Kagome's lips were left parted. "I'm not Naraku. You saw me destroy that puppet. You saw me transform."

"Y-Yasha…" Kagome shook her head. "No…he's…"

"That was me."

He was too close! Kagome jumped up, adrenaline pitching, "NO!" She tried to turn but Inuyasha's hand whipped out and grabbed her wrist.

"I'm not going to let you run away, Kagome! Stop struggling!" Inuyasha pulled her sharp and quick. A small yip of pain left her lips but she didn't stop struggling, she kept pushing and pulling, punching his chest.

"Let me go, damn you! Let me go!"

"I'm not going to let you push me away! Kagome…" She continued in her fighting and the hanyou growled. "Stop i—"

Kagome slapped him across the face, a stinging sound that echoed across the trees.

His voice died and both their bodies froze. Slowly, a rugged red hue began to seep out on Inuyasha's cheek.

Kagome bit her lip. _Oh no…_

He twisted his head back around and his eyes were glittering with anger. "You damn wench, what did you do that for?"

The miko tried her best to keep her tone icy and strong, "I told you to let me go, it was your own fault!"

Inuyasha shook her wrist once and her brisk mask crumbled, the fear was back. _Dammit, be gentle. Remember?_ But he couldn't stop his tongue from spouting out, "I didn't do anything to you!"

"You call this doing n-nothing?" Kagome winced by that pathetic crack in her voice. _Be strong. Fight him! Its Naraku remember it has to be? "_I-if you don't let go…I swear I'll kick you."

He felt a small stroke of pride by the girl's spirited threat. Inuyasha could feel a smirk coming on, "Oh yeah…I dare ya."

Kagome frowned and shouted, "Fine!" And she swung up her knee. Inuyasha, seeing where that knee was planning on connecting, immediately released her and hopped back a foot.

"HEY!"

The woman ran.

The hanyou growled.

"Oh no you don't!"

And he leaped, colliding on top of her, causing them to tumble, and become a rolling ball of kicking legs and punching arms. Kagome yelled and grunted as Inuyasha finally made it on top of her, pinning her hands down above her head.

"You sneaky little bitch." Inuyasha panted.

Kagome glared and twisted, "Get off of me!"

"NO!"

His bark froze her.

Inuyasha tried to ignore the silky warmth of her body beneath him. He tossed his head from side to side. This was not the time for that!

"You're going to listen to me, got it?"

But his planned words whisked out like a breeze when tears gathered in Kagome's eyes. Her bravado had died. And his defenses too.

"H-hey, now, don't cry…"

Kagome shut her eyes and moved her head, catching a whiff of his smell. _Dammit!_ His scent was the same. And his appearance and his attitude. She could feel a flush springing out along the bridge of her nose by his close proximity.

_NO!_

She hated herself by her reaction.

This was Naraku. Their enemy, the bastard who had killed her true love. And now he was trying to seduce her, lull her into some false sense of security and then kill her!

She couldn't let him win.

But she knew she was weakening.

"N-Naraku…please…stop this…" Kagome hiccupped. "I know it's you, stop doing this!"

She gasped when Inuyasha lifted her upper body and slammed her back down. Her eyes popped open and her breath hitched by his rage. "I AM NOT NARAKU!"

Kagome's eardrums filled and pounded with pain by his shout.

"For the last time! I'm Yasha! O-or, I mean, I'm Inuyasha. I'm me! I was the dog. I was granted life again, got it? I'm not Naraku!" He was left fighting for breath and there was now pleading in his—_perfect—_amber orbs.

"What?"

Inuyasha lowered his head and sighed. His frost white bangs concealed half his face and he suddenly released her, standing up. Kagome sucked in a deep breath by the weight being lifted off of her. Another heart beat and she was quickly coming to her feet.

"What did you say?"

He cracked his knuckles. "Dammit, Kagome. This wasn't what I wanted. I didn't mean to yell at you or…I mean…"

Kagome licked her lips again. "What did you say? About Yasha…about…"

He then lifted his chin and her heart skipped a beat.

"I told you I would somehow always be with you. Remember? I said I would somehow always protect you…I promised."

Tears fell and Kagome annoyingly brushed them away. "It can't be…"

Inuyasha rushed on. "I wasn't meant to die, you know."

"What?"

"I wasn't supposed to die, that's what they told me. I was supposed to survive from Naraku's attack and end up destroying him. That's my destiny. But they didn't expect the enormous energy he created and my body was damaged beyond repair, so I had to die! But they said I could come back, but since you guys burned by body, a new one had to be created. And since you guys also needed me so much, they told me I had to borrow another body and wait until my new one was ready! And that's why I was the dog! But just now, when you saw Yasha transform, that was because my body was ready and I didn't have to be the puppy anymore and…"

Inuyasha gasped when she placed a finger on his lips. His eyes rushed to meet hers. Kagome was crying again. "I…this can't be real…you know? I mean…your story is so ridiculous…"

"But it's true, dammit! Remember, you found me at my funeral! And there was that demon attack where it stabbed me and…" Inuyasha desperately fought for words, irritation rising. Why couldn't he ever say the right thing? She probably still though he was Naraku or she was going insane, either one!

"_I can't take the pain…"_

"_Give me salvation…"_

"_Kill me…"_

"_I WANT TO DIE!"_

"This can't be true. I saw you die…I s-saw them bury you…" Her smile had fallen and it was almost like his hopes were dying one by one as her tears grew.

"Didn't you hear me? You have to believe me!"

She took back her hand and hugged herself. "I…I can't believe you. I have to be dreaming. I want to believe it. More than anything! But…" She shuddered back a sob. "I just can't."

"I'll prove it!" Kagome jumped and looked at him.

Inuyasha was practically hopping by the idea. It had worked for Shippo; he could surely prove it to Kagome!

"H-how…how could you possibly…"

The hanyou bit his cheek, contemplating and searching, but his heart started to fall as only a headache grew instead of an idea. Kagome could see it and she clasped her hands together, "You…c-can't think of one can you?"

Suddenly, right then and there, it struck him and Inuyasha nodded frenetically. "No, no, I got it!" He smiled in relief and whispered, "I got it…"

One of Kagome's brows rose and hope flared to life. "You do…wh-what is it?"

Inuyasha lifted a corner of his lips and pointed up. Kagome blinked and tilted her head to look at where he was pointing but she didn't see anything. She shook her head. Inuyasha frowned and pushed her shoulder a half circle and pointed again.

Kagome narrowed her eyes and closed one to better see at what the heck Inuyasha's finger must be pointing to. But all she could see was…

"The moon…"

"You nagged me for days on end, begging and finally _sitting me_ just to know why the hell I stared at the moon every night. Do you remember that?"

Kagome hiccupped and nodded.

"And when I finally surrendered…what did I tell you?"

The words came like a pledge, a pledge straight from the soul.

"Be-because it never changes…I mean…it does change shape but it never leaves," Kagome covered her face and she felt her hanyou's warm breath steam on her forehead as he slowly coiled his arms around her. She laid her head on his chest and his heartbeat filled her thoughts. "It always comes back…n-no matter what…"

Inuyasha smiled and breathed in her scent. "I like that."

It _was_ true.

No one knew about that. Not even Naraku…because…that had happened in her time.

He never could have found out.

And that meant…

Her prayers had been answered.

* * *

Kagome cried and Inuyasha never let her go.

Like before, he didn't say a thing.

It had worked.

Inuyasha expected to have to stand there for a few minutes longer but unexpectedly, Kagome twisted and lifted her arms. "Kagome…?"

She grinned, face streaked and flushed, and cupped his face, "I…I waited for you…"

Inuyasha raised a brow but before he could answer…

Kagome covered his stunned mouth with her own.

Her fingers coiled into his hair, tickling along his scalp and pulling him closer, and all Inuyasha could do was let her guide him.

His eyes closed and he drowned in her taste and feel and scent.

And he finally snapped awake and reacted.

Kagome and Inuyasha kissed and held one another like at any moment the other would be ripped away.

But soon oxygen was required and Kagome's head was lying under the hanyou's chin. She closed her eyes and snuggled closer.

"You really…do keep your promises don't you?"

Inuyasha smiled by her sleepy tone. He as well, was completely drained and sleepy. He tightened his arms. "Of course, without me you'd probably get eaten."

Kagome chuckled. "Don't make me say the 's' word."

"I didn't do anything."

"Oh yeah? Well if you were Yasha…what about the hot spring?"

Inuyasha stiffened and his face grew bright red. "Hey, wait, I tried to…I mean…"

Kagome laughed, and it was the most beautiful sound the hanyou had ever heard. He relaxed and she leaned up and kissed him again with tender love. Right as his eyes started to close, her hands trailed up and a weight was lifted off his shoulders.

The tinkling of beads made him start and he stared at his love in surprise and the rosary dangling in her fingers. "You don't need these anymore."

"B-but…wait…what if I…turn full demon or…" what was he saying? No more sit commands! But still…

Her blood on his hands.

Kagome smiled. "Don't worry. I have a new power of subjugation."

Inuyasha frowned, "Oh yeah? And what the hell is that?"

"This."

And she drowned him again.

Vaguely Inuyasha could practically hear his demon side purring. She was right…_sneaky wench…_and he surrendered to her power.

"I love you Inuyasha…and I'm never going to let you go." Kagome mumbled against his lips.

Inuyasha grunted, "I'm not stopping you." He smiled.

"And I love you too."

* * *

**_:smiles huge:_**

**_I promise to all of you now! I WILL FIGHT AGAINST THIS WRITER'S BLOCK!_**

**_It's coming! The epilogue is coming! Please don't desert me now!_**

**_I've put you through so much, my blessed readers, and I thank you..._**

**_...but just a little longer!_**

**_Then it will be done!_**

**_:sniff:_**

**_YAY!_**


	17. The End?

_**This is dedicated to the people we have lost that will always be remembered. **_

_**And the people no one knows are gone. **_

_**This is for everyone who has touched my life and I have freely given my love to (even if they don't know about this story). **_

_**And doih…**_

_**This is for you. The reviewers who have given me praise and criticism, the OMG and the frustration to get my butt in gear. And for also the readers, who enjoy my little novice and OOC story, in silence. **_

_**I write to be free. I write to bring emotion to others. But I never expected I would get so much emotion back in return. **_

_**Thank you, from the depths of my heart. Thank you. **_

_**And now, GET READING!**_

_**Lil-Yasha**_

**

* * *

Always There**

**Chapter 17**

**

* * *

EPILOUGE**

* * *

The air was thick with the smell of sweat and coming success. Exhaustion was mounting, but with the pumping levels of adrenaline filling their bodies and the wonderful thrill of battle, they could keep going for probably another hour. And the reptilian spider youkai had no chance.

Four human like figures stood before it, chests rising and falling with rapid provision, their forearms were sliced and diced with minor cuts, but smiles were alit on their faces.

One young woman, girlhood finally erased from her body, gave a meaningful glance to her companions and raised her bow, pulling back the string with a mocking slowness. The youkai's hundred eyes glittered with sudden apprehension and leaned back. Blood oozed over its eight scaly legs, and with its new position, a ray of sunlight made the visible pink jewel fragment in its forehead twinkle.

A barking chuckle rose deep in the hanyou's throat and he lowered a bit on his knees, hands twisting around the hilt of his massive fang sword. A smirk twisted his lips. His pure white bangs lowered over his amber eyes, giving him a look of danger. But to the miko who had cocked her brow, it just made him look too darn cute for his own good. She blushed and quickly went back to the matter at hand.

The remaining two warriors, full fledge humans, also got into a battle ready position. The male, black hair falling in wisps around his handsome face, pulled out from the dragon tail at the nape of his neck, slammed the end of his golden staff into the ground and wrapped his free hand around the holy beads encircling his opposite wrist. He glowed at the woman next to him, a prideful and fortitude taijiya, who steadied her massive boomerang on her shoulder, ready to fly. She smiled back and there was warmth in her eyes that now was freely shown. The monk noticed this and like all the many other times before, it sent a satisfying leap to his heart.

"You guys ready?" the hanyou ruffed.

Far off in the background, snuggled comfortably against the belly of a transformed neko demon, a kitsune yawned and shouted, "Can we hurry this up? I'm hungry!"

By those words, rumbles went off in each of the warrior's stomachs in answer.

Miroku bit his lip and placed a hand on his mid section, "Yes, Shippo is right. Let us finish this and then have lunch."

"Does PB&J sound good you guys?" Kagome asked.

From the corners of their eyes, they saw the slow bowing of the youkai, getting ready to either flee or pounce.

Inuyasha wrinkled his nose, "Didn't you bring any ramen from your time?"

"Course I did! How could anyone forget with you asking every five minutes?"

"I just wanted to make sure!"

The miko and hanyou both glared at one another but slowly smiles tilted up the corners of their mouths. Their eyes softened. Kagome giggled and steadied her bow. "Silly puppy."

"I'll get you for that later."

"Excuse me," Sango said, "but I believe there's still a task that needs to be finished."

The three blinked. "Oh yes!" Miroku laughed, "How rude of us." His violet eyes narrowed. "Let us get this over with."

"Finally!" Shippo yelled. "Come on! I'm starved!"

The four warriors turned and Inuyasha took a leap forward with a snarl, raising his sword, "Oh no you don't! You're not getting away that easily!"

The poor reptilian spider youkai froze in its weak attempt to slither away. It flipped over and lifted its spiked scaly legs to defend as Tetsusaiga sliced down. It was to no avail. Limbs and sickly green blood twisted across the sky, raining down upon the ground. The demon screamed a curdling, high pitched shrill and bucked around, trying to gain its footing, or what was left of its eight legs.

An arrow pierced through its abdomen, purifying out a perfect hole before striking the grass. "Hurry Sango!" Kagome yelled, running over while pulling out another arrow.

"I got it!" Sango spun and threw her Hiraikotsu. A whooshing sound was the last thing the youkai heard before the boomerang hit and sent its diamond shaped head flying. "Miroku!"

On cue, the monk released the tunnel still cursing his right hand and sucked in the remaining body of their enemy. With talented ease, he wrapped up his purified beads and ended the winds. "All done! And I must say, my dear Sango, that throw was magnificent."

The taijiya laughed and jogged past him, on the way, lightly punching his shoulder. "Shut up, you pervert."

Miroku feigned a wounded look, clutching the robes above his heart, "Oh that hurt! Mustn't you apologize for such a remark?" He grinned and followed the running form of his betrothed. "Perhaps with a kiss?"

"Don't make me whack you Miroku!"

"I'm only asking for an apology!"

Kagome smiled and slowed to a trot, walking calmly to her love. She watched as Miroku grabbed Sango around the waist and spun her in circles. Their laughing and soon wrestling forms (the miko was certain they would start kissing soon. The monk was definitely a bad influence. He wasn't the only one who initiated the smooching,) easily sent a glow of warmth to her chest.

"Shouldn't they try to be more professional? This isn't a game, you know." Kagome raised a brow and smirked at her hanyou. He was resting an arm on the hilt of his sword, where the tip was sunk deep in the oozing decapitated head of the thrashed spider snake.

"Please, like they're the only ones." Inuyasha blinked and slowly a blush inched along his cheek bones as Kagome gripped the neck of his haori and pulled him down. Her vanilla scent relaxed the tense demonic side within him still surging for battle and he didn't fight against her sweet chaste kiss. "Admit it. You'd love to wrestle too."

He snorted, "It would be a short match."

Kagome let out an incredulous huff, "Ah, mister tough guy huh? Think I still can't send you face first? Because I'm still capable even without a rosary."

"Yeah right." Inuyasha straightened and pulled out Tetsusaiga, sheathing it and then patting it affectionately. "I could take you down with one finger."

"I'd like to see you try!" Kagome bent down and snatched the jewel shard entrenched in the corpse's skin. On impact of her touch, the shard glittered pink and the head wisped into dust. She stood up and touched the fragment to a bundle hanging around her neck and it quickly melted into the quarter orb and added to their collection. They had compiled quite a few over the past few months and she had learned a new trick to fuse them together. It was much more useful then having the shards clinking in a bottle.

"You'd like to see me try eh? I wouldn't have to try or use any effort at all. Weak little girl, it'd be all too easy!" Inuyasha smirked, crossed his arms and then strutted off to Shippo and Kirara.

"Weak little girl?" Kagome bit the inside of her cheek and sniffed. "Well then, that settles it."

"Sure does settle i—AH!" out of nowhere a soft body rammed into his back and the hanyou was sent tumbling. Kagome jumped on top of him, struggling to pin his arms. "H-hey! Get off!"

"Not until you learn your lesson, buster! Weak little girl my ass!"

Inuyasha growled, "I told you to stop cussing. That's my thing."

"Whoever said that it was just your thi—mmmph!" Kagome then found herself flipped over and lips over her own. "Hey…not fair…" she mumbled.

Inuyasha stole her voice with another kiss and then stood up, giving a satisfied smile by her groan and her playful punch to his calf.

"And that wasn't fair either!"

"Whoever said I play fair? Now shut up and make me some ramen, woman, I'm starving!" The hanyou gulped in instant regret by the fire crackling in his mate's eyes.

"What did you just say?" Kagome whispered slowly.

"Uh…" Inuyasha took a step back. "Um, I-I said I …love you and…good bye!" He sprinted off.

"Oh no you don't puppy _dearest_! Get your butt back here!"

A few meters away snuggled comfortably still against Kirara's flank, a little kitsune rolled his eyes by all four of his companions' antics. Really, they were supposed to all be nearing their twenties (who knew about Inuyasha's age though with the fifty years on the tree and his demon blood) and yet they were still acting like stupid kids with crushes.

"Adults, can't live with them, can't live without them. Right Kirara?" The neko mewed in agreement and lowered her big head, purring out a sigh.

Shippo grunted and hopped to his feet, cupping his mouth, "Hey! Mama, papa! Didn't you hear me? I said I'm _hungry_! H-U-N-G-R-Y! **_HUNGRY!"_**

Kagome and Inuyasha, red with laughter and exertion, slowed and looked over at their surrogate son. "Well then make yourself something, Shippo!" Inuyasha yelled twisting as Kagome started to poke along his ribs again. He choked out amid guffaws, "S-stop being a b-baby!"

"Don't call him a baby, Inuyasha, he's grown a lot. HEY!" Inuyasha jammed his knuckles (being mindful of his claws) under her armpits and tickled her back. Kagome's body stiffened and she pushed against him. "STOP!"

"No way! This is revenge!"

Shippo growled and crossed his arms, planting himself down in a familiar pout with his legs folded Indian style. "Adults, can't they see I'm wasting away over here?" He looked over at Miroku and Sango who had stopped wrestling a moment ago out of sheer tiredness. Now they were just sitting side by side being entertained by Inuyasha and Kagome. "Miroku, Sango! Can you make me something to eat?"

The couple looked over and laughed. "Inuyasha is right Shippo. You can make your own lunch. I've seen you do it before." The kit stuck out his tongue at Miroku and went to his feet.

"Fine." Shippo then gave a slow evil grin. "But not until I…"

Inuyasha and Kagome beginning to slow were pushed into another match by the assailing little form of Shippo, jumping from one to another, tickling. The kit snarled and dodged all their tries to snatch him. "Can't catch me! This is for neglecting your son! I'm only a kid, you know. I can't fend for myself!"

"Stop your dribble, brat and come here." Inuyasha gripped Shippo's tail and ripped him over, rubbing the boy's orange hair.

"H-hey, stop. Mama, make him stop!"

That one small word melted her insides. One day that just started, Shippo calling her mama, and Inuyasha papa. They independently decided not to question it and soon it became habit in response to call him sweet heart or honey. Not like Inuyasha said anything like that however, that was a bit too much for his pride.

She smiled and shook her head. "Not this time. You brought this upon yourself."

Kagome stood up and gave the demons room to battle. Walking over to join Miroku and Sango, the taijiya said, "Shouldn't we be worried Inuyasha will go overboard?"

The miko giggled, "It's hard to believe, but Inuyasha really can be responsible. He won't hurt him." She sighed when she sat down.

_On the contrary, _she thought, _he would do anything to make sure nothing hurt him. Inuyasha loves Shippo, it's easy to tell. _

When the kit called him papa or asked to sleep with him after a bad nightmare, and there had been a lot of those after Inuyasha's transformation, her hanyou's eyes would soften dramatically. The guy now had a hard time saying no. Even though arguing still happened, Kagome could notice Inuyasha's gentle fatherly side growing. When Shippo got hurt, the hanyou would comfort him. When he asked to play, Inuyasha would comply, but he always made sure to be careful of his superior strange and the sharpness of his claws and teeth.

When the kit jumped on his shoulder or into his lap, Inuyasha would allow it and act like nothing happened. He spoke to Shippo with a softer tone now and gladly taught him all he knew.

And when he thought no one was looking, when Shippo hugged him, Inuyasha hugged back, ruffling his hair with obvious affection.

Her favorite part, Kagome sniffed back sudden tears, was when Shippo whispered four words in her hanyou's ear.

_I love you, papa; _he look that came on the dog demon's face every time those words were uttered, that was her favorite look in the world. Besides when he said 'I love you' to her of course.

Kagome laughed when the kitsune hopped onto Inuyasha's head and gnawed on his ear. Yep, there was a new relationship now between those two.

Between all of them.

Death definitely changed people.

"Well there is another jewel shard down. Our search is becoming a little thin. There can't be much left." Miroku stretched and plopped down on the grass. Sango nodded and her hand trailed to the monk's head, unconsciously starting to run through his hair. He looked up at her and smiled, closing his eyes and enjoying the ministrations.

"Yeah, I think now the only ones left are what Naraku has." Kagome hid a smirk by her female friend's nurturing. It had taken a while, but bit by bit Sango's shy side had broken down. It was sure to happen what with Miroku stealing a kiss from her every which way.

And now they were getting married. The date was still undetermined and it had been a long, emotional confusing argument over which getting married was a good idea. What if…his curse took him before…?

* * *

"_Sango, my love, I would rather die knowing you were mine. Please, will you give me the honor of becoming my wife?"_

_And Sango, with tears in her eyes, held his face and whispered, "Yes. Yes! Yes!_"

_Kagome and Inuyasha snatched Shippo and covered his eyes as the two kissed. _

* * *

The miko laughed softly. It was still a worry, Naraku and Miroku's curse. But in her heart and soul, there was another part of her, deep amid the worry and fear that believed it was all going to turn out the best in the end.

How could anyone not believe in miracles, what with Inuyasha and Sesshomaru now getting along?

That had been terribly surprising! It was subtle, and there was—yes--still arguing and—yes—still sword matches, but times before she had walked in on the two in a serious and even—YES—humorous conversation.

She was just now getting used to it.

_It's almost like I missed something. Like something drastic happened and I missed out. _

That was how she felt with all of these new relationships. Inuyasha and Sango now acted like brother and sister. Inuyasha and Miroku were better friends as well. Inuyasha and Kaede, he and her brother, mother, grandpa, heck even Kirara!

_Well, remember the stories he's told you? About when he was Yasha. You know yourself the way you opened up and poured your heart out to that little pup. You couldn't have been the only one. _

Kagome bit her lip. How could have Inuyasha coped with that, with all that grief and the unbearable confessions? No one could have gone through such an experience and not change in someway.

And how Inuyasha had changed.

Everything about him seemed softer somehow. The harsh indifferent mask he had always worn was chipped. He laughed now. He had serious conversations. He argued, oh yeah, he still had a bit of a temper. But he wasn't so defensive anymore.

_Because the hidden selves of all of us were opened to him, all the wounds and sorrows we carried was dumped onto him. He knows us more, that must be it. And in turn, we know more about him. _

_We're closer, than ever before. _

All the crying that had occurred, tears of pure joy and disbelief. And all the celebration when everyone discovered Inuyasha's rebirth with the pattern of shocked faces, gasps, hugs, and whoops. And also the occurrence of breakdowns and the enormous energy that came when that horrid burden was lifted, when people realized that he was back and he was alive.

Souta's exclamation of, "Big brother", her mother's hard embrace and the whisper of her love to her dear son, her grandpa's playful whack to the hanyou's head and then the ruffle of his hair, Kaede's beautiful smile as she draped his mended haori over his shoulders.

Inuyasha smiled back, he hugged back, he playfully whacked back. Inuyasha had matured.

And she had as well.

Kagome's fingers lightly glided over the love bite on the nape of her neck. She remembered being so shy around boys, especially Inuyasha, not even able to hold his hand without a half hour of self preparation. And now she kissed him when ever she felt like it. That horrible time without him, she wasn't going to waste the time she had with him now.

And he was hers forever.

_

* * *

She stepped out from the night shadows in that same cool, composed, mystery and looked at Kagome. Her dark brown eyes of the dead now seemed to brighten with acceptance. Kikyou stepped over to her young incarnate and placed a hand on the girl's shoulder. Kagome had winced, expecting a slap, she had finally stolen Inuyasha's heart after all, so she blinked in surprise by the gentle contact._

"_Kikyou…I…" Why did she come here? She had seen the older woman's spirit dragons and had quickly snuck off. That seemed backwards…but she had needed to see Kikyou before Inuyasha did. But what did she have to say? "I…"_

"_I'm happy for you."_

_Then Kikyou smiled. _

_And slowly her long spiritual dragons wrapped around her. _

"_Wait!" Kagome cried. What the heck was that about? This was going too quick. _

_Kikyou's face grew serious and she lifted off the ground. "I will be the one to kill Naraku. But I leave you to own Inuyasha's heart."_

_The woman disappeared with these final words, "Make him happy…like I never could."_

_Kagome stood there blinking in confusion. But slowly a smile beamed and her eyes filled with relieved tears. _

* * *

The insecurity in his eyes and the cute little blush on his cheeks as he asked her to become his mate was too precious. She had been confused at first. Mating? What like dogs?

* * *

"_N-NO! Idiot! I-its just…it's a custom with my father's side of the family…Sesshomaru explained it a l-little. It's k-kind of like marriage…just…more so…" Inuyasha covered his eyes in exasperation and embarrassment. "Dammit…this wasn't how I imagined it…"_

"_Yes…"_

"_I was going to do all this special stuff and…what?"_

_Kagome smiled, "I said yes". _

_It took awhile before it sunk in. "Y-yes?"_

"_Yes, Inuyasha, I will become your mate. But--!" The slow grin then halted in apprehension. "You have to agree on having a normal wedding like humans too."_

_He laughed and swept her in a spinning hug, laughter bubbled up to the night sky, echoing off the Goshinboku Tree, "Whatever you say!"_

* * *

They didn't have a determined date either. It was decided that they would have a double wedding after Naraku was killed. But although the wait was excruciating at times, Sango and Kagome both found great joys at staring at their rings (and showing off too, that was fun).

The miko's fingers spun the band, tilting it to have the sun glisten off the dazzling blue sapphire embedded in the silver. Engraved within the circle were simple but elegant words: _My heart is yours forever. _

* * *

"_It had been my mother's."_

_Kagome gasped and her head bounced up to meet the hanyou's gaze, "What, really?"_

_Inuyasha nodded, "It was the only possession she had from my father. You know, besides my fire rat fur. She wore it every day." _

"_A-and…you're giving it to me…?" Her visions blurred with tears, "B-but you can't…this must be so important to you!"_

"_It is. But it's a wedding ring, dummy, and you said you wanted a traditional human wedding too. Souta said that that means you need a ring. He said it was kind of like my mark in human terms." He grinned, obviously proud of himself, but by the stray tear falling down her cheek, Inuyasha's face twisted in concern. "Wh-what…do you not like it…I mean, I can get something different if you…"_

"_No!" She cupped his cheeks. "I love it. And I'm so honored. Thank you, Inuyasha."_

_His golden orbs glowed in relief. _

_The hanyou grabbed her hand and slowly slid the ring on her finger. Kagome hiccupped and admired the beautiful stone. _

"_Now your mine both ways, human and demon." Inuyasha stroked her cheek, wiping away her happy tears. _

"_I wouldn't have it any other way."_

* * *

There was another excruciatingly difficult part of this whole waiting thing…children. Sexual tension? Oh that was present but it was just going to have to be cooled for now. Sango and she couldn't possibly run around chasing demons pregnant. At least that's what Inuyasha and she had discussed who knew what conclusion Miroku and Sango had come up with. That was their business.

But it seems this conclusion wasn't drawn for Kouga and Ayame. They, what, already had about four kids or so? And boy did little demons grow up fast. Last time they had seen them they were hobbling and jumping all over the place.

But boy, were little demons cute too with those little pointed ears and tails.

Kagome giggled, remembering when she held one.

_

* * *

Inuyasha froze, ears twitching. He cautiously sniffed the air and slowly an evil grin grew along his lips. Kagome and the rest of the gang trudged up to him. Miroku raised a brow, "Um, my friend, are you…is there something coming?"_

_It had been a new start to the retaking of the jewel shard hunt. There had been a month or two of reminiscing and loving the restored hanyou, but now the much loved hanyou had finally convinced them to get going again after many weeks of griping and moaning. _

_Already that old groove of traveling came back to them with their leader in front and small chatter coiling around in the warm spring air. It was a beautiful magnificent afternoon with the enjoyment of reliving the "good old days". _

_And now their leader was giving a most worrisome smirk. _

"_Perfect, the ass has finally decided to show up. About time." Inuyasha muttered and before anyone could ask, he dashed off into the woods. _

_The minute the winds calmed from his sprint they picked up again when that familiar tornado headed towards them. Two of them actually and just like that, Kouga and Ayame popped from their spin and slid across the dirt. _

_The couple gave a shy smile. _

_Kouga had made a clear effort to stay as far away from the grieving miko. So when Kagome brightly smiled and ran up, clasping both the wolves' hands, the two were most definitely surprised. _

"_Kouga, Ayame! It's so good to see you!"_

"_Uh…hi, Kagome. We just…smelled you nearby and thought it a good idea to come say hello." Ayame bit her lip. _

_Kouga sent a nervous glance to the others. "Um, yeah, hello."_

_Any moment now, Kagome's brightness would darken with a snap of a lightning bolt. Any minute now…they should go before that happened. _

"_Oh, Kouga and Ayame, I have someone I need you to meet. He's a friend of ours that I think you've met before." Kagome giggled. _

_The wolf couple felt the back of their necks prick with apprehension. Or maybe that was the low whisper of, "Hey wolf breath…" hissing in their ears. _

_Who knew demons could scream. _

* * *

Shippo lied panting, strewn over Inuyasha's lap. The kitsune wiped his brow and paled when his stomach gave a mighty gurgle. The half breed's answered with a growl.

"How about a truce, kid?" Inuyasha muttered, still trying to catch his own breath.

The kit nodded with a smile, "Okay." He jumped to Inuyasha's shoulder as the hybrid stood up. "So can we eat now?"

Inuyasha smirked, "Yep. Let's get some grub."

"Finally!"

Their three human companions smiled as the two walked over to them. Inuyasha warmed by Kagome's clear love in her eyes. "So are you two finally done playing?"

"We were not playing. I was teaching the brat an important survival lesson." Inuyasha crossed his arms, lifting a smug chin.

"Oh yes, tickling is a sure important survival skill."

"I'm serious. Demons learn to fight and hunt by wrestling, it's a big lesson."

Shippo blinked, confused, and slowly comprehension dawned when Inuyasha sent him a meaningful glance. "Uh, yeah, yeah that's right! We weren't playing! Playing is for kids."

Inuyasha snorted and nodded his head in satisfaction, "See?"

Kagome lifted a brow, "Oh yeah, I see. And I suppose after such a difficult lesson you would like some lunch now?"

The demons snorted and said at the same time, "Damn right!"

Kagome glared.

Inuyasha and Shippo sent each other a panicked look, "Uh, no, um, we mean…"

"Please?"

The miko beamed, stood up and patted their heads. "Good boys. I trained you well."

A little while later, Shippo was gulping down a PB&J and Inuyasha was slurping down a bowl of ramen. Kagome, Sango, and Miroku stared in distaste.

"Like father like son I suppose." Miroku mumbled, politely nibbling his sandwich.

Sango grimaced and looked away, "Maybe too much so."

Kagome winced and shook her head, "Um…oh hey! Shippo, Rin wanted to know if you'd like to play with her tomorrow."

The kit slowed and swallowed. "Yeah? Okay, sure!"

Miroku wiggled his brows, "I'm impressed, Shippo, at such a young age and you already have women asking for you." The monk laughed as Sango pushed him.

Shippo only looked confused. "Huh? What are you talking about, pervert? We just like to play."

"I thought playing was important survival lessons." Kagome chuckled by Inuyasha's scathing look. She turned to her surrogate son, "It looks to me like Rin has a little crush on you, Shippo."

That only made the kit look more confused.

"I think Shippo's the one who has a crush." Sango grinned.

Instead of a blush or indignant remark like expected, Shippo rolled his eyes. "I don't know what you guys are talking about. Rin and I are just friends. And besides she likes Kohaku."

What once was word of taboo sent these friends laughing. Sango looked at her companions with bright mirthful eyes, "They would make a cute couple wouldn't they?"

The humans continued chuckling. Inuyasha and Shippo shrugged at each other and continued eating.

* * *

"_What is that woman's name?"_

"_Huh?"_

"_The demon slayer who travels with you."_

"_Oh, you mean Sango. She's strong…for a human."_

"_What is her connection with Naraku?"_

"_Remember Kohaku?"_

_Tension. _

"_Yes."_

"_That's her little brother."_

_Silence. _

"_He reeks of death."_

_A sad whisper, "He is dead. He lives only by the jewel shard in his back."_

"_You will need that fragment in the future."_

_Sigh. _

"_I know."_

"_He will die when it is taken away."_

"_Yeah, I know."_

_Slow regal footsteps and no goodbyes. Such strange conversations, but it was a beginning. _

_Over his shoulder, Sesshomaru's soft voice came back to Inuyasha. The hybrid straightened from his relaxed position against a tree. _

"_I will bring him back."_

"_What! Why?" Inuyasha called to his brother's walking form. _

_Sesshomaru never slowed. "Rin is fond of him."_

_And that was that. _

* * *

"Ah, that was good." Shippo patted his tummy and burped. He blushed, "Excuse me."

Miroku nodded. "Yes Kagome, that was very appetizing. You have such delicacies in the future." He wrapped his arms around Sango and nestled his chin on her shoulder.

"It was just a sandwich." Kagome laughed from her comfortable place in Inuyasha's lap.

The hanyou sniffed and yawned. "I still liked that green crunchy stuff better."

She rolled her eyes, "Fine, fine, I'll bring pickled radish next time. Happy?"

Inuyasha chuckled and kissed the nape of her neck, loving the way she shivered, "Yep."

"So what should we do now?" Shippo rolled over on his back. Kirara mewed and walked over to curl up next to the child's side.

"Shard hunting, duh. We still have a long way to go." But even with those words, Inuyasha made no move to stand up. He breathed in his mate's scent and sighed.

Kagome leaned back in his chest. "I say we rest for now, we've been walking and fighting for hours."

There was a small silence.

"Inuyasha?" Kagome whispered.

The hybrid snorted, "Hmm? Yeah, fine, whatever."

Sango grinned, "Being a dog those couple of weeks has sure made you lazy, Inuyasha."

Inuyasha opened his eyes and glared at the woman, "Shut up, Sango. I'm not lazy…I'm just…saving my energy for the next fight."

"Hmm? Oh yeah, fine…whatever." The taijiya waved her hand in a mocking dismissal.

Kagome's hand immediately flew up to Inuyasha's ear when he growled, and gently petted. His growl softened and he buried his face in the crook of her neck. "Damn wench…" he muttered. She could feel the heat of his blush and smiled when he relaxed.

"Powers of subjugation." Kagome grinned.

Miroku chuckled, "I have to say these breaks of ours are wonderful but I still haven't gotten used to them"

"Lazy pup," Sango whispered.

"Shut up Sango." Inuyasha retorted, eyes still closed.

"I like the—"

A high pitched, slightly comical scream broke off Shippo's words. Everybody stiffened and turned to locate the sound. A fine chiseled young man, a player no doubt by the way he showed the contours of his chest with his gaping kimono, ran towards them in stark terror. His mouth opened and emitted another shrill scream.

Kagome punched her mate's stomach by Inuyasha's snort of laughter muffling in her shoulder. "Be nice…"

"He screams like a girl…"

Kagome bit her lip to keep from smiling.

"What is the problem si—"

"DEMON! DEMON! DEMON! DEMON! In the village! IT IS SO….UGLY!" The man covered his eyes and shuddered, spinning in circles. "YOU HAVE TO HELP US! IT SMELLS SO BAD!"

The shard hunting companions looked at each other with excited grins.

"Looks like we've got another one."

Inuyasha stood up, Kagome in hand and Miroku did the same with Sango. They all grabbed their weapons. Shippo hopped to a transformed Kirara's shoulder, still shaking with laughter.

"W-well…l-let's go help…" Shippo looked over at the still spinning man and bellowed with mirth.

Inuyasha smirked, walked over and bopped the guy on the head. The man fell on his butt in silence and shock, a lump starting to sprout on his temple.

"Inuyasha!"

The hanyou waved his Tetsusaiga, "What? The guy was giving me a headache. Now come on, we've got some work to do!" He began to run down the hill.

Kagome rolled her eyes and followed.

Miroku was the last to leave and when he walked past the dazed man, he dug through the folds of his kimono and pulled out a few coins. He threw them down on the man's lap. "Here go, uh, buy yourself some pride."

"But I don't know where to find that." The baka said.

Miroku raised a brow and decided it best not to answer, he ran off to join a waiting Sango. As they trotted after the others, Sango gave the monk a contemptuous look. "Go buy some pride?"

He shrugged embarrassed, "It was spur of the moment."

"Okay." Sango nodded with sarcasm. "That guy sure could scream, huh?"

"Most unbefitting." Miroku shook his head.

"Hey guys!" Shippo cried from his perch on Kirara.

"What?" Inuyasha answered, sniffing the air to trace the demon's scent.

"Let's have dessert after this!"

"Shippo," The three humans groaned as one.

"Do all demons think with their stomachs?" Sango asked.

"Yeah, dessert sounds great!" Inuyasha answered to Shippo's statement.

Kagome looked back over her shoulder, "I think it's just these two."

Miroku sighed, "Most unbefitting."

They laughed.

And these unlikely companions ran off into the distance…

…ready to kick demon ass.

* * *

**OWARI!**

* * *

It's finally over. It's...finally...over? Really? No it's not!

:blink:

It is...

Wow, it is. Um, I don't know what to feel, it seems so surreal, and I'm a poet and I didn't know it.

Uh, hehe.

Thank you guys for everything. This happened for you and wouldn't have happened without you. Thanks. O.o

It's over?

Well,I guess Sayonara everybody. This won't be the last of me!

I'll be back!

Yasha-Chan


End file.
